Also? One time I had a lot of unrequited love for a guy, for years, when I was a lot younger. He friend zoned me after I told him I was into him, and I just waited around being his friend like a sick puppy. One night after we went raving with a bunch of people, he and I had sex. When he said he wanted to, it was like a dream come true. But the sex ended up being lousy, and then it made us connected in a way that actually felt off. He started to reveal more and more about himself to me privately, and I actually got kind of turned off by him. By then, he had seen me following him around for years and assumed I really liked him... but I ended up rejecting him! It was a "be careful what you wish for kind of situation".
That is all to say... maybe you're barking up the wrong tree and you don't fully realize it because you're viewing this person with rose tinted glasses. Or maybe you don't have rose tinted glasses, but life is still saying "no" to you for your own good, and you'll never know why. Can you trust in that no? I think if you can find that trust, you will start to feel better. Trust that it didn't work out the way you wanted, for your higher good! Sometimes missed connections are a blessing in disguise. Or maybe not. But either way, you need to gradually navigate how to invest your energy elsewhere... like in loving people who actually love you back!!