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  • EADD Moderators: axe battler | Pissed_and_messed

Tell a shit joke

A Glasgow man - steaming and skint - is walking down Argyle Street.

He spots a guy tinkering with the engine of his car!

"What's up Jimmy?" he asks.

"Piston broke," he replies.

"Aye, same as masel."

Basically a native now, K. Innit ;)
 
For those of you who like to keep up with the differences between vegetarian, pescetarian, demi-veg, quasi-veg, flexitarian, vegan, palaeolithic, macrobiotic, gluten-free, low-carbohydrate, high-fibre, Kosher, Halal, I-Tal, Lenten fare, biosynchronous and other diets, I have great delight in bringing you: The ASCIItarian diet. ASCIItarians still eat m**t, but "star out" certain words when typing them, such as b**f, p*rk, l*mb, c***k*n, b*c*n and so forth. There is a branch of very strict ASCIItarians who even go so far as to star out m*lk and ch**se; with controversies raging over y**st and h*n*y.
 
one will make your day.. and one will make your hole week
 
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i can cut wood just by looking at it.

Its true i saw it with my own eyes
 
The only gift i got at the christmas family get together this year was a grain of rice......

Thanks a lot Uncle Ben!
 
A few of my friends have hemorroids . The rest are perfect assholes.
 
A wee boy goes into a cake shop and points in the window and says "Is that a cake or a meringue?"

"No, you're right," says the baker, "it's a cake."

herbavore said:
A few of my friends have hemorroids . The rest are perfect assholes.
Click to expand...

=D
 
Q. What's the difference between a packet of Polos, and Wales?

A. One's a mint with a hole in it, the other is a hole with a Mint in it!
 
Anal sex is a lot like spinach: if you're forced to have it as a child, you won't enjoy it as an adult.
 
Why did the Mexican throw his wife off a cliff?



Coz he hated the bitch...
 
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