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Sex Rise in popularity of anal sex has led to health problems for women

90sdance said:
I dont think porn works like that tho, im not sure we can have a healthy amount of it (like sex itself or food) - its more like the idea we can use cocaine recreationaly. The thing is that the pornographic baseline tends always to shift to its most extreme element. Allot of guys of my generation started watching porn as kids. Our introduction to sex was pretty heavy material, so if thats the baseline then our expectations are going to be out of whack with what most woman want. Then allot of guys bore easily with the standard material and want harder stuff, more variation, more intensity. What was the baseline keeps getting moved back. The most watched porn of ten years ago (that was already completely unrealistic) is replaced by harder and in many cases more violent content. This isnt to say people cant watch it and have good relationships, im sure allot of people do (relationships prevail through many harmful indulgences) - but it will always warp peoples desires and expectations having an overall negative effect on the culture.

I recall some time ago, i brought up the topic of a certain sexual act with my ex (it wasn't even that extreme by average standards) but owing to her somewhat unusual upbringing (like not being allowed to watch TV or have a personal computer) she was aghast at the thought of it. My mind, habituated to all manner of perversion thought her expression to be comical - but i see in her attitude now something of a past that was lost, an echo of another time. To her mind sex was sex, no intermittent thing was required of it, and she respected the act as she respected herself. Now thinking back on it i should have been embarrassed to even bring it up. It reminds me of that scene in Taxi Driver when De Nero brings Cyrill Shepard to a porno theater, and she leaves upset and in disgust, yet De Nero cannot understand why. In this time we are all like De Nero, so habituated to carnal excess that we are blind to the correct way of things. In the animal world no codes of conduct or deeper meaning are attributed to sex, and this is the way we are headed. There where perverse people before the advent of porn, but perversion was not proliferated, yet alone normalized.
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I like the analogy you use here. I have not seen this movie, but I take your point. And you are correct that social and cultural norms as per sex are definitely becoming more permissive than in previous times. You can view this as good or bad, depending on your perspective. Some people will think of it as a greater freedom, and others will view it as a deviation from the way sex is "supposed to" be. I personally have tried many different things to spice up my sex life in the past; but in the end, one always returns to vanilla sex, because the other things are intended to be just that: a spice, not the main course. You can experiment, but ultimately people tend to get tired of all of the bells and whistles and they just want to have straightforward sex. Especially as you get older and have less energy! Almost every couple I have spoken to has told me a similar story to what I have experienced in my own life.

I used to watch porn, myself, and I did notice that one gets bored of one particular topic after a while and then you need to find something else that titillates you. But it doesn't necessarily have to be something that's more, as you put it, perverse. Sometimes it's just different. I don't watch porn these days in the sense of looking at a film, but I read sexy stories, because that way I can visualize the scene in my head with whoever I want in place of the couple being written about. I can put myself and my lover in the mental picture, and that works for me better than any porn star with fake boobs, lol. None of the fictional scenarios are very outré, but I don't require it to be.

I'm not anti-porn by any means, but on another note, one could theoretically argue that porn is oppressive to women and that any feminist should be ashamed to utilize it...I don't necessarily agree with this POV either, but I can see why some people might feel this way
 
xtcgrrrl said:
I'm not sure I agree that porn is making us more perverse. I'm pretty sure that people were still sick fucks before the advent of readily-available porn, lol. :shrug:
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I dunno about that.

There have always been people into some really kinky and bizarre shit, but they were more isolated. Every depraved thing imaginable can be found online now, and I don't think we can just ignore the "nurture" side of things. People's behaviour is really strongly influenced by their environment and porn is a major environmental factor. I was introduced to porn at quite a young age and I know for sure that it has influenced how I look at the male body, especially when it comes to certain fetishized body features. It took me a long time and a period of abstinence to recalibrate my attractions to normal physiques again, but the porn physique is still heavily embedded in my sexual psyche.

This is born out in how gay men idolize certain body types, and men who have those body types can literally be with any sexual partner they want. That's not nature, that's nurture. The innocence of an organically developed attraction that arises unexpectedly is lost on many because of porn. If it weren't for my recalibration, I wouldn't have met and ended up sexually relating with some really great guys because they were not on my "porn body radar". If you go on profile sites, there is soooo much objectification: "uncut dicks only" "guys with muscles only" "beards and masculine features only" "must be dom, must be able to do X Y Z sexually". They are seriously just placing some porn fantasy order. And let's not even start in on how men behave in bed. I've been with enough guys to be able to say that many are running the porn script in their brain. When you get them to slow down to practice grounded intimacy, they start freaking out. Omg, why are you asking me how I like to be touched! Why are we talking at all?! Why are you looking at me in the eyes?! This is boy psychology runing rampant after receiving all of its primary sex education from porn.

I can't say porn is making people more perverse. Maybe it's just showing us a mirror of all the gnarly shit that exists in our society. But I'd definitely say that porn is hindering people's ability to form healthy connection, even if the connection is just sex.
 
Anal has just never sounded like a good time to me. Like Ive took opiates all of my life. Im too concerned about how great itd feel to get some shit out not cram more back in. Plus when Im in my 60's I wanna still be able to cough in public and still keep my shit together. If I am allowing you to marinate in my mouth and vag but you still wantin up my ass...we just aint meant to be bruh....buh bye
 
90sdance said:
sodomy has always been around but i think the popularization of it, like all kinds of fetish and paraphalia is partly down to the nature of depicting sex in media and the development of tech (when you satiate peoples desire to look at normal sex long enough thel eventually want new and increasingly more perverse stuff).
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So how do two men have "normal" sex without resorting to "perverse stuff" ?
 
90sdance said:
The thing is that the pornographic baseline tends always to shift to its most extreme element.
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As I've said before on this topic, I hear a lot of people say this but I actually don't think that it's true.

The internet has come a long way since 2007 - which means that trends in online pornography have changed, too, with a newly released survey on the subject revealing some interesting truths about society and sexuality.

In honor of PornHub's ten year anniversary, the pornography purveyor has released 10 years worth of information about who is watching porn, how they're watching, and what they're watching.

While some of the survey results are unsurprising - 'MILF' is one of the sites most enduring categories, for example - some of the statistics might catch you off guard, such as the fact that Kim Kardashian was the most popular porn star of 2008 (her infamous sex tape was released one year prior).
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www.dailymail.co.uk

Decade-long pornography survey reveals surprising statistics

PornHub has released the results of a ten year survey that indicate technology has played the biggest role in changing how people watch porn. Of course, many viewers' interests have remained firmly in tact.
www.dailymail.co.uk www.dailymail.co.uk

"Amateur" is perhaps the most popular genre of all genres of pornography...not quadruple penetration gang bangs or whatever you'd expect from a domain of content that is supposedly constantly pushing its users towards escalating extremity of content. From wiki (yeah I'm citing wiki, suck it)

Like traditional magazine and VHS/DVD-based pornography, Internet pornography has long been a profitable venture. However, with the rise of Web 2.0 ventures and amateur pornography, websites based upon the YouTube platform of user-generated content and video sharing have become highly popular. By January 2008 a search for "porn" and "tube" returned 8.3 million results on Yahoo and 8.5 million on MSN.[24] (By October 2017 searches for "porn" and "tube" returned 23 million results on Google. By March 2017 searches for "porn" and "tube" returned 1420 million results on Google.). Video hosting service "tube" websites feature free user-uploaded amateur pornography,[24] and have become the most visited pornography websites on the internet.

Since the content of these websites is entirely free and of reasonably high quality, and because most of the videos are full-length instead of short clips, these websites have sharply cut in to the profits of pornographic paysites and traditional magazine and DVD-based pornography.[24][25] The profits of tube-site owners are also squeezed in an increasingly crowded market, with the number of sites constantly growing.[24]
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xtcgrrrl said:
I'm not sure I agree that porn is making us more perverse. I'm pretty sure that people were still sick fucks before the advent of readily-available porn, lol. But I do agree that the fact that porn is so easily obtained can be a problem for people who don't exercise self-control with it. My ex husband was addicted to porn to the point that he had difficulty cumming with anyone "normal." AKA not a porn star. And he needed to watch porn in order to finish, sometimes. Porn is a fantasy. But if you overindulge in it, you can become dependent on it for sexual gratification, and it can warp your perspective of regular women.

i'm no longer attractive to my ex because I'm 42. He only "dates" 20-somethings that he obtains off of Seeking Arrangement.
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I had to look this up and found:

"Seeking is the luxury dating site for successful and attractive singles"

So essentially old men and young women then 🤔.

Then again I have a female cousin in her 40's who is very successful (at least, in the financial sense) and she recently snagged a boyfriend in his early 20's. She recently posted some pictures of them together on her instagram page, and the dude has a sort of scared, uneasy look on his face 🤣
 
negrogesic said:
I had to look this up and found:

"Seeking is the luxury dating site for successful and attractive singles"

So essentially old men and young women then 🤔.

Then again I have a female cousin in her 40's who is very successful (at least, in the financial sense) and she recently snagged a boyfriend in his early 20's. She recently posted some pictures of them together on her instagram page, and the dude has a sort of scared, uneasy look on his face 🤣
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Apparently even politicians use it! lol...

Matt Gaetz allegedly used this site to pick up chicks to do ecstasy with :ROFLMAO:
 
CFC said:
Make Trad Great Again! It needs a sexy makeover imo.
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The Left decided to embrace fatness, disability and anti human climate commie cult. So, the right is hot dudes who lift, read and clean their room, and cute girls who want kids. The fatties with green hair can whine about capitalism in their fossil fuel free tents.

The New Ideology will be the Form of the Left with the Essence of the Right.
 
negrogesic said:
I had to look this up and found:

"Seeking is the luxury dating site for successful and attractive singles"

So essentially old men and young women then 🤔.

Then again I have a female cousin in her 40's who is very successful (at least, in the financial sense) and she recently snagged a boyfriend in his early 20's. She recently posted some pictures of them together on her instagram page, and the dude has a sort of scared, uneasy look on his face 🤣
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our tech overlords have create platforms (like seeking or only fans) to normalize prostiution to destroy families and propagate widespread degeneracy to control the population.
 
90sdance said:
These fetishes are most definitely proliferating both in terms of popularity and intensity (im not sure what that daily mail article was supposed to prove).
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It was posted to suggest, not necessarily prove, that some of the most popular pornographic content online is falls into pretty banal categories, not "weird shit" like you're arguing
 
Well I think this is in the correct sub-forum at least. It's called people having intercourse. (sex) Oh no. Duh. lol.
It's what they do. :alien:
 
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90sdance said:
Well the game is to shift the very definition of things like banality isnt it - normalize this or that, give a little porn to the kids here and there, keep it low key, the culture changes - legislate for this or that ect. As has been pointed out already what was normal ten or twenty years ago has changed. I find it funny how you and your associates always put hyphenated comas around terms like ''weird'' or ''wrong'' - almost like you dont believe in any such categories. So just our of curiosity, what if any expressions of sexual desire do you find unacceptable ?
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Well, as long as it's done between consenting adults, I don't really have a problem with any of it. Yeah, on a personal level I can find much of it weird, even fucked up, like "race play", certain varieties of extreme BDSM etc, but I advocate for a live-and-let-live philosophy regarding sex, based upon my libertarian principles on social matters.

I put "weird" in quotes because some of the things that you're characterizing as "weird", like anal sex, isn't really weird to me at all. That, like MILF porn or amateur porn etc, is also banal IMO (or banal, if you will)

Furthermore, you seem to be framing this whole issue as something that a malicious intent is behind. Look at how they're "keeping it low key", so that "the culture changes"...towards what end? If it's simply to make money, then that's simply the latest iteration of a capitalist drive to maximize profits, following a pattern going back centuries. Nothing new or unusual at all about that, the only new thing is the technology that enables it. Every time there's a change in the social or sexual landscape, like the "sexual revolution" of the 1960s/1970s, people want to characterize it in a sinister way, rather than view it as just another change in the social/sexual landscape driven by impersonal technological forces like the birth control pill or the washing machine, etc. That's exactly what's taking place with the internet IMO.

I actually do agree strongly with the proposition that the internet has had a negative effect, in certain ways, on human interactions and interpersonal relationships. But what I don't agree with are the people using such matters as a trojan horse to smuggle in social conservatism (or ideologies even further right) under the guise of a genuine concern for people's mental health
 
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