Resolving not to use stimulants (amphet/meth) any more

[Neuroborean]

Strangely, drugs like meth have never really given me more "motivation" or really "more energy". Sure they make me awake, but I'm not necessarily alert.

Most of my motivation goes toward sex on meth. lol

The only class of drugs that has ever made me feel like getting up and cleaning or doing responsible chores is opioids. And the energy flows naturally & isn't "forced" like stimulants feel.

it happens the same to me.. I remember once writing and enormous wall of text while on a-php and probably that happent to me more than once while on other stims... but... I don't like the kind of stimulation most of them give me, some of them make me feel dumb or brain-dead, like NEP or lately 2-fma. I'm a bit frustrated cause I discovered that I have undiagnosed ADD and I wanted to find something that works for me, 1p-lsd microdoses do work but I feel them too strong for everyday basis. As you said, stims feel forced and don't increase my motivation, I just get hung on whatever I'm doing, preferably the easiest thing like scrolling... like a robot. Shitty drugs.

In the case of kratom, it helped so much but this last year/months is not doing the same, I'm now tapering to do a loooong t-break, of more than a month. When on the honeymoon and first year I've never felt so RIGHT and normal.. in all my life. I guess the dopamine was flowing properly. Kratom energy and motivation feels not forced at all, is completely all-emcompassing and it seems to come from the deep, so to speak. Never tried other opioids and I prefer it that way.
btw, yohimbe is a great stimulant that is very underrated and most people don't know how to use it. very low doses are the trick, and building a tolerance.

 

[JohnBoy2000]

I went to my local 7/11 today.

The girl hadn't seen me in a few weeks and said "your face looks different.... younger".

Using amphetamine or meth since last february regularly, then nothing this last month my appetite returned, the gaunt appearance is reducing.

I notice that as well specifically around the naso-labial fold lines.

Hell of a thing, what that crap does to your body.

 

[n3ophy7e]

I went to my local 7/11 today.

The girl hadn't seen me in a few weeks and said "your face looks different.... younger".

Using amphetamine or meth since last february regularly, then nothing this last month my appetite returned, the gaunt appearance is reducing.

I notice that as well specifically around the naso-labial fold lines.

Hell of a thing, what that crap does to your body.

Great to hear your body is recovering well. How about your cognition? Are you feeling better in that capacity?

 

[JohnBoy2000]

Great to hear your body is recovering well. How about your cognition? Are you feeling better in that capacity?

It was taking a while for sure. I was spending time with my parents a lot for emotional support over the last few weeks.

As of today just over 4 weeks out, it does feel like I'm beginning to come around more completely now.
Being more present, more with-it (more cognizant).

However I'm "set up" at this point, neurally, cognitively, the meth-psychosis felt not only like meth excess, but that there was potential neural damage (though I will concede that's purely bro-science).

But compared to how I normally feel, it felt like I'd done real damage.

And real damage takes longer than just the drug half life to wear off.

So yes at 4 weeks, much much better, I'll give it another 1 or 2 weeks to put the rubber stamp on it and say complete recovery, but at this point I'm almost certain I will get there.

.........

I had done meth in the past, 1 year ago, 18 months ago, binges, and the come-down was never as severe.
My neuro/cognitive development since then (as per blog) seems to have generated a neural state that's much more sensitive to external chemicals.

So just got to be super careful about any/every consumption of such in future (i.e. avoid everything at all costs).

 

[n3ophy7e]

It was taking a while for sure. I was spending time with my parents a lot for emotional support over the last few weeks.

As of today just over 4 weeks out, it does feel like I'm beginning to come around more completely now.
Being more present, more with-it (more cognizant).

However I'm "set up" at this point, neurally, cognitively, the meth-psychosis felt not only like meth excess, but that there was potential neural damage (though I will concede that's purely bro-science).

But compared to how I normally feel, it felt like I'd done real damage.

And real damage takes longer than just the drug half life to wear off.

So yes at 4 weeks, much much better, I'll give it another 1 or 2 weeks to put the rubber stamp on it and say complete recovery, but at this point I'm almost certain I will get there.

.........

I had done meth in the past, 1 year ago, 18 months ago, binges, and the come-down was never as severe.
My neuro/cognitive development since then (as per blog) seems to have generated a neural state that's much more sensitive to external chemicals.

So just got to be super careful about any/every consumption of such in future (i.e. avoid everything at all costs).

Very good to hear you're feeling better upstairs as well as physically. Yep it's a very harsh reality that as we age, the comedowns get more harsh, the damage gets more profound and the repair takes longer. Still...the human body is still pretty damn amazing huh

 

[Nas47]

it happens the same to me.. I remember once writing and enormous wall of text while on a-php and probably that happent to me more than once while on other stims... but... I don't like the kind of stimulation most of them give me, some of them make me feel dumb or brain-dead, like NEP or lately 2-fma. I'm a bit frustrated cause I discovered that I have undiagnosed ADD and I wanted to find something that works for me, 1p-lsd microdoses do work but I feel them too strong for everyday basis. As you said, stims feel forced and don't increase my motivation, I just get hung on whatever I'm doing, preferably the easiest thing like scrolling... like a robot. Shitty drugs.

In the case of kratom, it helped so much but this last year/months is not doing the same, I'm now tapering to do a loooong t-break, of more than a month. When on the honeymoon and first year I've never felt so RIGHT and normal.. in all my life. I guess the dopamine was flowing properly. Kratom energy and motivation feels not forced at all, is completely all-emcompassing and it seems to come from the deep, so to speak. Never tried other opioids and I prefer it that way.
btw, yohimbe is a great stimulant that is very underrated and most people don't know how to use it. very low doses are the trick, and building a tolerance.

Never tried yohimbe,vut is old scool med.probably strong and with side effevcts too.rememberbin old days-cantaridaes extr.-spanish fly tabl.some sort.powerfull aphrodisiac here.discontinued long times ago

 

[Neuroborean]

Never tried yohimbe,vut is old scool med.probably strong and with side effevcts too.rememberbin old days-cantaridaes extr.-spanish fly tabl.some sort.powerfull aphrodisiac here.discontinued long times ago

I read a lot about the side effects, I guess it depends on the person, I can see how some people talk about the side effects but in my case wasn't even a thing.
It's a must to dose low, half a teaspoon of bark, make some tea, and work your way up to whatever feels allright to you. Some initial anxiety-like feelings and perhaps headache due to dehydration in the come down (which is softer than anything else I've tried) can happen, not always.
Is pretty potent for being a plant but it's not like an RC poison so to speak.

 

[wareika]

speed sucks - its garbage - always has been and always will be

nothing good comes from it

I put this comment on my desktop

I've been building that same view over time, i think. Thanks for saying it more explicitly. For me it's that it promotes meaninglessness. Which is corrosive to life & intelligence. And the closest thing I can imagine to the nightmare realm.