Could use a recovery story right about now. My visual snow is worsening. I just had to pass up a job because of it. I'm struggling a great deal. Anyone recovered from mdma induced hppd?
Im not sure how severe your HPPD is but I only have tinnitus+VS and I can say that when I am busy I dont really notice either. Im only going to speak about VS here since I have absolutely no other "HPPD" symptoms. So im sorry if you have other things but this is what ive noticed with VS
My VS worsens with stress but when I am busy and/or less stressed I dont notice it.
Thats my theory, but im no doctor.
I think there is a balance between avoiding all stress completely and overworking/stressing yourself. I still go to college and all and I think that helps. Too little "stress" in this LTC leads to understimulation/boredom for me. I think when too unstressed I get low dopamine or something. Idk just my theory.
Though my capacity to handle stress has gone down I think having work or school helps.
Im of course no therapist either and I don't know what kind of job you declined but--
Do you think the VS is *seriously* hindering your life that bad that you can't do whatever that job required. Do you think that if you went to this job (and could handle the mental stress etc) it could even potentially help you?
Ive been in classes seeing all the VS on the board and everything but somehow it doesnt really get in the way of me paying attention. Its like my brain has adapted.
HOWEVER, sometimes this adaptation randomly gets "bent" (not broken) and I percieve the VS as having gotten worse even if it hasnt actually gotten worse. And after experiencing going into these bouts of VS "noticing" (or floater noticing) ive concluded this is a matter of neuroadaptation. Again, im not a therapist or doctor, but this is my personal experience. Whilst the neuroadaptation is shaken up due to say stress or obsessive thoughts it feels like itll never go away and life is ruined etc. But eventually somehow it just goes away without me actually realizing it. Its still physically there but its not emotionally bothersome.
Also--another thing for some perspective and this isnt intended to "put down" your situation with VS but just helped me--- think of all the blind people in the world. Shit happens. Remember, you are still alive and can at least *see*. Even blind people somehow eventually adapt to their situation.
PS-- I am feeling positive today so that could be the reason I am not "caring" as much about this so there is that mental state component too. When in a better mental state, I care less and less about these things as my mind gravitates towards thinking about other things like all the cute girls out there etc....
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