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MDMA Recovery (Stories & Support - 4)

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ADubbs said:
unless the meds just make us worse in the long run! That's my biggest fear....I'll become dependent on them for sleep then I'll be worse off than if I just tough it out.

Came across this study today....states that people with low serotonin appear to be susceptible to loud noises, which I definitely am now. Also states when people go on SSRIs that they're tolerance to loud noises goes up...interesting.
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Have the study handy for me to peer over?
 
Hi guys - thanks to all that have supported me over the past few days.

I seem to be coming out the other side and anxiety levels dropping to something manageable. My diazepam schedule looked like this:

Day 1: 25mg
Day 2: 20mg
Day 3: 10mg
Day 4: 5mg

So far today completely benzo free, but fuck it was scary in those first few days. My panic attacks in the first days of the MDMA LTC could generally be knocked on the head with 5mg of valium, so to have to go to 25mg without having taken any for ages shows the state I was in.

Stay away from the stimulants guys - they are bad news.
 
..... and after going through this, never again will I complain about the lingering tinnitus, eye floaters and slight cognitive issues. What a walk in the park they are compared to the terror of fully-blown anxiety.
 
Go Easy said:
..... and after going through this, never again will I complain about the lingering tinnitus, eye floaters and slight cognitive issues. What a walk in the park they are compared to the terror of fully-blown anxiety.
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Full blown major depression is far worse than fully-blown anxiety and i have experienced both. The thing with anxiety is that it is easily manageable, especially with medication. Depression on the other hand is a tricky beast to tame because many meds just do not do a thing for it!
 
Mikek11 said:
Full blown major depression is far worse than fully-blown anxiety and i have experienced both. The thing with anxiety is that it is easily manageable, especially with medication. Depression on the other hand is a tricky beast to tame because many meds just do not do a thing for it!
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Agreed mainly because with depression the emotional numbness makes life feel so empty and hopeless. Whereas with anxiety at least there are things in the moment that can be done to calm things down right away. And with depression its tough to make yourself feel better asap in the moment.
 
So i just got back from the neurologist. I'm going to be doing more cognitive tests, an EEG and an MRI. I have a feeling all tests will come back normal. He thinks that the issue is psychiatric. The way he describes it is that these tests are looking at the brain at at a much larger scale than what we need. The 'damage' or changes that we talk about on here are too small to be tested for. Basically that's how I dumbed it down for myself to understand. He also said what everyone keeps saying which is that time is the healer.
 
fnono33 said:
So i just got back from the neurologist. I'm going to be doing more cognitive tests, an EEG and an MRI. I have a feeling all tests will come back normal. He thinks that the issue is psychiatric. The way he describes it is that these tests are looking at the brain at at a much larger scale than what we need. The 'damage' or changes that we talk about on here are too small to be tested for. Basically that's how I dumbed it down for myself to understand. He also said what everyone keeps saying which is that time is the healer.
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I had an MRI and it came back normal. Also my doc reiterated what yours said, MRI's won't show the type of damage we may be experiencing. The neurologist I saw had no idea what X was...great....but she reiterated that Remeron is a very mild AD.

at this point I'm done with doctors unless it's to get something else prescribed. This week my bruxism had been stronger/worse.
 
Serotonin neurons only make a very small part of brain cells. That's why MRI shows no results.
 
Would recommend Fish Oil too, my concentration improved dramatically after 2 days!
 
Amml said:
Serotonin neurons only make a very small part of brain cells. That's why MRI shows no results.
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Even then, it's not thought that the actual brain cell body (soma) is damaged itself, mostly just some of the nerve terminals that are the "branches" of the tree, if you will. Fortunately the branches are trimming themselves or growing all the time anyways.
 
Cotcha there was an earlier post you made about antihistamines and maybe stating away from benadryl... I was curious as to why? I sometimes took it for sleep before all this and thought about it again but if I should avoid it then I definitely will
 
Cotcha Yankinov said:
Even then, it's not thought that the actual brain cell body (soma) is damaged itself, mostly just some of the nerve terminals that are the "branches" of the tree, if you will. Fortunately the branches are trimming themselves or growing all the time anyways.
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That's true, the nerv cell itself is not damaged. But unfortunately it needs a lot of time until the axons reinnervate.
 
Amml said:
That's true, the nerv cell itself is not damaged. But unfortunately it needs a lot of time until the axons reinnervate.
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Think I'm hindering my axon recovery by using remeron? I get bad anxiety just thinking about it! I feel the same if not worse than I did a month ago, ugh. My tinnitus is definitely louder which sucks.
 
Some non-LTC sufferers have issues with Benadryl and Benadryl as well as other anticholinergics (M1 blockers) have been shown to be not so good for old people, the histamine part is okay but some people have issues with the other part, the anticholinergic part. If it's helping you sleep I wouldn't worry about it though. Some people just get the opposite effect and can't sleep on it.
 
I think it's still pretty unlikely that LTC sufferers or severe MDMA abusers are suffering issues because of axon loss, I wouldn't worry too much about that. I think I would focus on what helps your sleep the most. Lower doses of remeron like 7.5mg mostly just work through blocking histamine receptors anywho.

Only maybe half the serotonin receptors are on serotonin cells anyways. And there are many types of "bad" anxiety provoking serotonin too.
 
Cotcha Yankinov said:
I think it's still pretty unlikely that LTC sufferers or severe MDMA abusers are suffering issues because of axon loss, I wouldn't worry too much about that. I think I would focus on what helps your sleep the most. Lower doses of remeron like 7.5mg mostly just work through blocking histamine receptors anywho.

Only maybe half the serotonin receptors are on serotonin cells anyways. And there are many types of "bad" anxiety provoking serotonin too.
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Thanks Cotcha. You're posts always calm me down which I appreciate. What are your thoughts on down-regulation, and the similarities of symptoms between LTC sufferers and long term SSRI users? There seem to be many similarities.
 
Of course, and always guys and girls feel free to ask any questions in here or PM me.

I think the similarities between LTC sufferers and long term SSRI withdrawal sufferers are interesting, the brain zaps especially. I think what may be happening is that there are longer term compensations for alterations in serotonin activity. For example, maybe after a big reduction in serotonin signaling after MDMA use (from receptor downregulation and other natural homeostatic mechanisms like pre-synaptic autoreceptor activation) or SSRI withdrawal results in some synapses reorganizing, and it takes a while for them to reset. That both an LTC sufferer and an SSRI withdrawal sufferer suffer very similar symptoms, but that we know SSRI withdrawal sufferers aren't experiencing any actually brain injury, is very reassuring.
 
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