TDS Is killing yourself really the answer to all suffering?

I find Buddhism to be a very dangerous philosophy, because similar to christianity, it is an anti-cosmic religion that associates life with suffering and the world to be something that must be escaped. YOU are here for a reason and that is NOT to learn some lesson and then piss off from this "lowly" realm of "agony" into some ethereal pleroma. The truth is that YOU are here to participate in the world and enjoy it. Think of life as a participatory game, or a sandbox, rather than a place full of limitations and suffering. Simply reframe your perception of life and soon life itself will change. Ideas like Buddhism, Gnosticism, Nihilism, etc. won't help you in preventing suicidal thoughts, because they alienate you from the world around you. Gaslighting people into believing that the world is an illusion is an excellent tool to make them give up on life, isolate themselves from what is happening around them and leave the playing field to power hungry tyrants who want the least amount of resistance from the population.

If you want a philosophy then I suggest you look into pantheism, more specifically material pantheism (the notion that god(s) and all things spiritual are not transcendent or seperate from the world but actually immanent in it).

EDIT: just to prevent misunderstandings, I did not shit on Buddhism as a whole. It has some valuable teachings to live by, but this whole life=suffering idea is very unhealthy and detrimental to a fulfilled life in my opinion. And before some triggered buddhist says that I have no idea of what I'm talking about: I have read the Pali Canon from start to finish and Buddha's teachings basically boil down to that equation...
IMO you're quite wrong about the religions you're talking about, you have a Nietzschean/luciferian-like POV about religions... I'll be clear about it:

People like you tend to forget so many thing about the world, specially the historic context and the basic human nature during millenia.
Life on Earth is and always have been hard and full of suffering, the fact that you have lived a relatively easy life (a life without much suffering and pain is unusual in terms of what millions of people live everyday) doesn't mean that billions of people didn't live that during millenia and still today. Go to some country in war, and stay there for months, you surely come back different.
When people go to places like poor places of India, some people vomit, because what they see it's overwhelming, then they realize that so many people there is loving, full of warm personal qualities, they share whatever they have... and they are not suicidal at all. Most of those people is religious.
Religion was created to create another type of relation with suffering, specifically buddhism tells something that it's a basic truth: if you attach to something, you become idolatric and then you suffer, because the world is a flow, nothing remains. The central concept of Buddhism is attachment and dharma, not suffering.
Most Buddhist can enjoy life, but.. without attachment, there's nothing bad in the world, because nothing it's inherently bad, only attachment, because it leads to suffering. They don't say: "don't enjoy eating that fruit, keep your senses off, because it's pleasurable", they say instead: "enjoy it while it last, but don't expect it to last more than it really last, all passes"

Christianism is not necessarily institutionalized christianism, otherwise it would be an evolving doctrine because the Church doctrine has changed overtime so much, and there's thousands of different perspectives about the Bible and about what Christ said. It's more like the positive egregor and all of what it has been done in history actually according the words and ethic message in the new testament.
Again, considering that Christianism centers everything on suffering is just a cliché of those who never got close to the Bible or Christ. Is just like those who talk negatively about communism but have never read The Capital or the Communist Manifesto.
Considering that the context of christianism was a completely fucked up context on which jews were more or less slaves... then you understand that the message of Jesus was not really about suffering or overcoming suffering, but was more like wining the enemy doing the exact opposite that they were doing, loving instead of hating, uniting instead of separating... and so on. The idea of "common good", universal respect and love between races and cultures, was born there.
Initially that was the message, the fact that the Church did this or that in the name of God it's obviously a mistake and was violently misguided, but the message was clear, and the genuinely spiritual people who follow that religions knows that.
Now, the idea of sacrifice..
normally those who are completely self-absorbed, ego-driven and full of resentment, like Nietsche was (and consider that I've read and re-read thousands of pages of him, including the unpublished notes of his diaries), those think the idea of sacrifice is some kind of self-loathing act of giving yourself in the name of something that it's not you, so it's like denying yourself, and denying your own will just to please whatever else (like God). That's a very fucked up misunderstanding. The problem with those ego-driven philosophies fail in the same point: they think there's nothing higher than themselves.
Those philosophies or religions of what I call inner trascendence fail to see something crucial: the religions of outer trascendence don't deny inner trascendence and their personal value, they just understand that there's values, powers and realities that we cannot reach directly and their clearly above our personal will.
That means that there's a possibility of beings above whatever we could become, ever. I mean, imagine that science discovers that there's different dimensions and there are beings (like for example DMT entities) that are infinitely more powerful and creative that we could ever imagine and become (even with millenia of transhumanism). Practically those beings could be "gods", but that gods are not what abrahamic God is... not at all. Abrahamic God reaches a similar realization that hinduism mysticism: Being must be infinite, self-driven, ever conscious and creator, and probably some qualities that we cannot even grasp.
Yes, we have also that qualities but in a limited amount, and whatever it happens during history we'll never be God, because we are not everything. This could be seen in a semi-pantheistic POV but it's not necessary, panentheistim is more accurate. It would be pointless to discuss about which type of "aspect" or person-like qualities God has, because it must be all and beyond, all and beyond it's all we can think about, it's negative theology.
This is where the idea of sacrifice and love comes handy, what Christ taught is that what leads to the world of God is love, and in a way love is sacrifice. Why? because when you forget about your own ego-driven desires, you trascend yourself becoming a channel of love, trascending our self-driven animal or spiritual wishes. A rock it's not as close to God because it cannot think about anything but to being passive, an animal can love their offspring, it has some qualities of conscience, but limited. A human being that it's closer to God is a human being that is closer to love and more specifically universal love that trascends their own interests and progeny. Science is not something that should alienate us away from God, on the opposite, it's a little glimpse into what God is, because it shows the rules, the rational and (beyond-rational) complexity that everything has in an abstract way, those invisible forces are just a glimpse (what our human filter can filter about the "reality"). Ending with this, love exists without sacrifice but often sacrifice is a part of love, because it means that you are able to give life a reason that it's beyond yourself, transcending yourself, into a higher creative nexus of love. I guess you know what I mean. It's not like you need to deny yourself for loving, it means that if that needs to happen, it's perfectly ok, because you know that as being part of God and the universe, our limited/finite existence is just a glimpse of what we could be. I think that this doesn't need a promise of heaven or hell to be real, but I understand that it makes sense because if justice cannot be a reality here, it must be somewhere else, if there's people creating wars and human sacrifices, pain of millions just because s/he feels good that way, then that being must be put in their places, somewhere, sometime. In my opinion that idea of sacrifice shouldn't mean to suffer that because of the promise, on the other way, it must mean that one should not be a coward and one must fight, even sacrificing themselves, to create a world of love here, giving some reason to suffering: transcending it via giving yourself for higher values and ethics. Loving your enemy means understanding that they are wrong but they could be right, if they realized how wrong they are.

World has obviously full of good qualities and potentials (specially nowadays in 1st world countries) but suffering has been a problem for millenia and still is, ending world suffering it's not only accepting suffering as it is (like stoicism or some christian interpretation) but also transcending our own desires trying to build a better world for everyone.
 
luciferian

Luciferian is a nonsensical word that only makes sense to christtards and cringy satanists, so let me educate you a little bit on ancient polytheistic theology: Lucifer was a minor god in the roman pantheon. He was the son of the goddess Aurora whose task it was to order the fixed stars. He was depicted as an infant to highlight his purity which in turn was an allegory of the purity of light itself (his name stemming from the latin root words "Lux" and "Fer" which literally means light bringer) and as such he has strongly venusian qualities. Lucifer has nothing whatsoever to do with the devil or anything nefarious. The association of Lucifer with Satan in the bible is due to a false translation and interpretation of Helel. This confusion becomes even more problematic when we consider that both the king of babylon and Jesus himself were referred to as the morning star (an alternate title of Lucifer). Lucifer was in some cases used as an honorary title by the romans for people who became known for some notable heroic act. A person named Aurelius would then earn the title as a suffix and be referred to as "Aurelius Luciferus" (Aurelius the bringer of light).
There is no such thing as Luciferianism and any made up ideology/worldview has nothing to do with the figure Lucifer. There is no category to accurately describe my metaphysical ideas about life and reality, but the closest that I come to is perhaps a mixture of Pantheism (god being immanent in his creation and simultenously taking on different forms to experience himself) and Kaula philosophy (I plan on getting a formal initiation as soon as I can manage to beat my drug addiction and spend a few years in india). But I assume this is too complex for such a black and white thinker such as yourself, so keep calling me luciferian/satanist or whatever the heck makes you sleep better at night lol. Everything you think you know about me is completely wrong and you have proven your utter ignorance about me by claiming that I live an easy life. You have not the slightest clue about the pain that I have experienced in my life.

I won't address the rest of your post due to time constraints and also partly because I just don't feel like picking apart the fallacies and strawmans in your text.
 
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let me educate you a little bit on ancient polytheistic theology
Won't lose my time with you considering that you see fallacies and strawmans without pointing them out and you consider more important to study a culture as perverted and full of shit as the Roman polytheistism before studying for example, babylonians (you say at least something about them) or sumerians, or even mixed old jewish culture" which shows much more clearly the figure of lucifer than the Romans. We don't need to get into history of the gods because the real development of the practices and beliefs are what build the realness. So then, if you see neo-Gnostics very different from old-Gnostics, well, it's obvious that they are different, but they share a common point: their attitude towards salvation through knowledge first. Those who defended these beliefs later were Austrian, Germanic and French and especially English occultist groups that ended up giving rise to the disgusting Theosophy, which are one of the groups that have made Luciferianism resurface (or be born, according to your historiographic and etymological worldview), all more or less related to the Golden Dawn, Freemansonry and similar groups.

You talk exactly like luciferians, that there's nothing bad about it, it's just a symbolic figure to talk about enlightenment and knowledge and so on, or well, as the Teosophist related put it: Lucis Trust.

There is no such thing as Luciferianism and any made up ideology/worldview has nothing to do with the figure Lucifer.
Ok, it has nothing to do with it, as you say, that could be because it's all made up by cringy satanist as the different societies I've cited, they made up things, if you like, but they (re)create an egregor that's fully working nowadays.

I come to is perhaps a mixture of Pantheism (god being immanent in his creation and simultenously taking on different forms to experience himself) and Kaula philosophy (I plan on getting a formal initiation as soon as I can manage to beat my drug addiction and spend a few years in india).
If you want that, I wish you very good luck, specially with the drug addiction problem. I also hope you don't get disillusioned or frustrated with the Kaula thing, there's so many people getting into indian philosophy and most of them have not see how it really work, they haven't been there so I guess it's some kind of neo-romantic exotism (yeah, I know, black & white..). If I could I would live as an anthropologist, if it was XIXth century and not XXIst. I say it seriously, I studied a lot of anthropology in college and loved it, so I do like to study different religious and cultural traditions, it's not like I wouldn't do, but everything has a context.
But I assume this is too complex for such a black and white thinker such as yourself, so keep calling me luciferian/satanist or whatever the heck makes you sleep better at night lol. Everything you think you know about me is completely wrong and you have proven your utter ignorance about me by claiming that I live an easy life. You have not the slightest clue about the pain that I have experienced in my life.
What I could see easily is that, by your tone, you still have a lot of pain to resolve.
I edit because I think you could not take this "lovingly": I have nothing against you, I don't think you're an asshole, nor I want to discredit you nor your ideas or perspectives. I do believe, firmly, that there's a fight in the universe, at least in our little world, I think there's people who willingly get in the bad path, and some others, the most of them, do it without realizing what they are doing. I didn't judge anything about you, in terms of think about if you are this or that, you're a perfectly free human being and it's very positive that you get into non-mainstream thoughts and philosophies, as if it was a response (or not, I don't know) of your suffering. The thing is that you could have read my text as an attack, and honestly, it wasn't at all my intent, so then, take it as you consider. I'm bored of online wars even if it's about fascinating stuff.
 
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Won't lose my time with you considering that you see fallacies and strawmans without pointing them out
Because my time is precious and I happen to have a real life outside of the internet, rather than debating and arguing with strangers I don't even know or care about.

and you consider more important to study a culture as perverted and full of shit as the Roman polytheistism before studying for example, babylonians
You are the definition of sciolism. You throw around the word "study" a lot without actually being able to back up any of your claims with actual, credible sources. What I said about Lucifer is a documented fact and not some religious nutjob conjecture like your baseless assertions and labelling anyone who disagrees with you as a "luciferian". Lucifer was evidently a minor roman deity and has nothing to do with Satan. PERIOD! Even bible scholars these days admit that.
In light of all that, the only person who seems to need some good amount of scientific studying is you.

a culture as perverted and full of shit as the Roman polytheistism
Oh yes, Ovid's poetic masterpieces such as the Metamorphoses, Fasti, Seneca's moral essays, stoic philosophy, or Cicero's De Natura Deorum are very clearly products of a perverted culture that promotes a harmonious coexistence with nature and its non-human inhabitants. So perverted.
You're talking shit about a culture that you don't even remotely know. It's obvious by the way you superficially and polemically write about it. As I said, pure sciolism and an ignorant display of the Dunning-Kruger effect. But fine, have it your way.

which are one of the groups that have made Luciferianism resurface (or be born, according to your historiographic and etymological worldview), all more or less related to the Golden Dawn, Freemansonry and similar groups.
Prove it. Prove that these groups worship lucifer. Name me just one freemasonic lodge that states that they worship a being called lucifer. The truth is they don't. The only "proof" that exists are lunatic, psychotic david-icke-alex-jones conspiratards who claim that these groups are devil worshippers without giving any factual evidence for it and using a name that has nothing to do with Satan and everything with roman polytheism. Go and do your homework.

You talk exactly like luciferians
Even if I do: so what? I don't give a shit about it. I don't even care about your uncalled for opinion. I don't even know what you want or expect to hear from me.

but they (re)create an egregor that's fully working nowadays.
Prove it with verifiable facts.

I also hope you don't get disillusioned or frustrated with the Kaula thing
Oh come on, spare me your "concern". You probably didn't even know what Kaula is until I mentioned it. No, a half-assed google search doesn't make you knowledgeable on it. If you wanna argue about Kaula philosophy, go and read the Kularnava Tantra before you come here with another uncalled for "opinion". I know what I do, I know what I'm looking for and I do NOT need a babysitter who warns me about things he very obviously doesn't understand.
If I could I would live as an anthropologist
No, I'm also not interested in your alternative life-story *yawn*

What I could see easily is that, by your tone, you still have a lot of pain to resolve.
Oh look, he is also a kitchen sink psychologist lol.
I don't think you're an asshole
You don't get it: I DO NOT CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU THINK OF ME! I also do not care about anything else you have to say to me. Go and find a hobby. I really don't care what you think about my philosophy. Ok, I'm a luciferian if you like. Are we done now???
 
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Lucifer was evidently a minor roman deity and has nothing to do with Satan. PERIOD! Even bible scholars these days admit that.
In light of all that, the only person who seems to need some good amount of scientific studying is you.
I clearly explained it to you, but you seem not to understand abstract symbolic thinking, or you are (much likely) playing dumb, not to adress the real problem.
Oh yes, Ovid's poetic masterpieces such as the Metamorphoses, Fasti, Seneca's moral essays, stoic philosophy, or Cicero's De Natura Deorum are very clearly products of a perverted culture that promotes a harmonious coexistence with nature and its non-human inhabitants. So perverted.
Look, guy, I studied philosophy and I have a good library with a good amount of the classics, the last book I've read, in fact, is Marco Aurelius thoughts.. my long term gf is quite an expert in ancient poetry and we talk about it. I did a long work about Epictetus and now I'm working in a master's thesis that would involved talking about stocism regarding how to search one's true vocation.
Their culture was totally perverted, because their culture is not just their cultural peak, but all the complete cruelty, inmorality and perversion that they created. You talk as people like Caligula was non-existant, and like the roman circus wasn't even real.
Prove it. Prove that these groups worship lucifer. Name me just one freemasonic lodge that states that they worship a being called lucifer. The truth is they don't. The only "proof" that exists are lunatic, psychotic david-icke-alex-jones conspiratards who claim that these groups are devil worshippers without giving any factual evidence for it and using a name that has nothing to do with Satan and everything with roman polytheism. Go and do your homework.
You are not even reading what I'm writing, I said they are related to, they don't straightly worship Lucifer, because, above all, luciferianism doesn't need to be a theistic worship but a symbolic, occult one. Luciferianism is not worshipping Lucifer or Satan as a god, that's absurd and childish. I explained before what means to worship symbolic luciferianism so you can go and search it.
You are behaving aggresively, with the typical reaction of those who don't want to address the problems or discussing, but just to discredit their POV.
In anycase, you can see (you surely know..) how the creator of modern Luciferianism, Aleister Crowley and Teosophy have strong ties.

"Satan is also mentioned in a handful of other places in this book, outside of the chapter dedicated to him, but in most instances what we find are variations of phrasings like ‘the existence of the Devil is a fiction, which no theology is able to demonstrate’ (Blavatsky [1877]/1988, Vol. I, 472). In the eleven years between this work and her celebrated The Secret Doctrine, Blavatsky changed her views on several topics. Earlier, she dismisses the concept of reincarnation, but now she comes to staunchly advocate it (Hammer 1999, 226–7). Satan, too, is seen in an entirely different way. She now affords him two chapters instead of one, and he becomes an explicitly positive symbol. Blavatsky argues that Satan – or Lucifer, or the Devil, as she often uses the names interchangeably (e.g. Blavatsky 1888a, Vol. II, 510–3) – brought mankind spiritual wisdom, and is ‘the spirit of Intellectual Enlightenment and Freedom of Thought’ (Blavatsky 1888a, Vol. II, 162).6 Like the Romantics, she draws a parallel between Satan and Prometheus (Blavatsky 1888a, Vol. II, 244)."


You also probably know that for her Lucifer didn't thought in a evil way, it was just "evolution", and it was thought, neutral thought, the same that he brings us with his light, so then you know... then that creepy guy, Crowley said created the Gnostic Catholic Church. Before that he entered the Golden Dawn on wchich all the founder members were freemasons. He joined them because he was attracted by some translations that were done by some people there and specifically translations about the first modern times author's that wrote about "Secret Chiefs" that totally resembles Gnostic esoteric teachings about Archons.

Oh come on, spare me your "concern". You probably didn't even know what Kaula is until I mentioned it. No, a half-assed google search doesn't make you knowledgeable on it. If you wanna argue about Kaula philosophy, go and read the Kularnava Tantra before you come here with another uncalled for "opinion".
I said it sincerely, but you're acting passive-aggresively so I think it's better to stop here. I don't need to know anything about Kaula anything, why you became interested in that? I could end up interested in what siberian shamans do and go there, but I wouldn't expect anyone to know about it.
But I will follow your advice, as soon as I really can, and I'll read it, then we could discuss, but I hope you'll a less aggresive tone.

You don't get it: I DO NOT CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU THINK OF ME! I also do not care about anything else you have to say to me. Go and find a hobby. I really don't care what you think about my philosophy. Ok, I'm a luciferian if you like. Are we done now???
yeah man, good luck
 
Personally suicidal idealization keeps me justifying my adicction, which also affects how I redefine suffering and misery. I know I have zero radical determination to terminate my existence right now, because there is not a substantial reason to give up on life because knowing it’s potentialities.

Every unbalanced brain affected by substance abuse is a unique mystery.

There is no answer from that kind of questioning since there’s no way back from that kind of choice.

But there a reason you today decided to put all this on perspective.

As you do, I’m struggling with similar thoughts, not getting a single clue of what’s happening, i just want to be happy, why and when it becomes impossible, I don’t know.

I only know that keep abusing is a way to make those suicidal idealization into reality, but in a slow denial loop, of suffering and misery self attribution.

For me, push my actual despair void into its limits, it’s not logical option to terminate with it.

I’m aware there is no way back while turning suffering into agony decision is made. This brings me nightmares at times.

Daily reformulate my own life preconceptions helped me not to keep speeding up my self destructive preconceptions and to find force to speak out what makes me feel bad and not let it grow exponentially in my soul and mind.

Hope you find a way to relief what are you feeling. I wish you to rejoice the joy of life again. Everything will be ok.
 
It might be an end to YOUR suffering - or not....cause no one truly knows what happens when our physical bodies die with 100% certainty.

With that said it may end your suffering but it's what your family and friends inherit, along with the guilt of feeling like there must be something they could have said or done, why didn't they realize it was so bad, how could they have missed the signs etc....so no you don't end your suffering you just give the gift of it to everyone who has ever cared about you. That's what I have to remember sometimes because like right now shit gets dark!

On a related but different note you asked if it would end all suffering and while this may be a bit sarcastic in nature I hope you see it for what it is intended to be which is a smartass reply and hopefully a way for me to make you chuckle or smile or even smirk, please don't think I'm not taking you seriously. I am. Most days lately I am right alongside you so maybe I am just saying what I need to hear. ....back to your question

" Is killing yourself really the answer to all suffering?"

no, you killing yourself does nothing to end the suffering of the starving children in Africa who are suffering

or the people suffering due to the hell in Ukraine it doesn't help those suffering from mental illness or chronic pain or any chronic medical condition

If you think about it, it really doesn't even end your suffering you're just not aware of it because you're dead.

switching gears again (thanks ADHD) after struggling with my personal beliefs about god and my theories about what the reality is over the last year I have taken a liking to the idea of reincarnation and soul contracts. The idea that we never truly die because energy never disappears it only ever changes form and we are energy that is life. And earth and our life here is just one in an infinite short phases of my journey to learn and grow and change and idk become enlightened? The theory goes something like we actually chose our parents and certain important people before we came down here because we wanted to have certain experiences to gain greater insights of ourselves - but one of the rules when we come to earth is that we lose the knowledge of our greater selves - we don't rember any of that until we return to ourselves after death. And I keep thinking if it's true I don't want to be mad atyself because I didn't level up and did essentially the same thing as throwing the controller down and walking out of the room only to come back in later and someone else is playing and I realize how close I actually was if I'd only given myself a little more time. Thinking of it that way helps me to not take everything so seriously either - I have to believe there is a bigger purpose or vision to all this then me being born, raised in the same religious cult my parents were born a d raised in to, growing up to disappoint and hurt my parents as they watch me fail over and over, struggling my entire life to just want to belong somewhere and never achieving it, breaking men's hearts because they fall in love and I don't have the capacity to return it to them in the same way, having the joy and what J believed was my purpose for awhile - my 4 boys arriving and the good times I have had with them and then the heartbreak of being so hopelessly addicted I miss most of their day to day lives and society sees me as scum and I see me as scum, hurting them over and over despite my best intentions and how much I want to NOT hurt them more than I have ever wanted to not hurt someone. So yeah , if this is all there is then what's the point????

When I get in those dark places what runs through my head is how if I ended my life then, yes, it would hurt them but it would be the LAST time....it wouldn't keep happening and then they could move on with their lives all of them my kids, my parents, if I have any friends. But I do try to counter argue myself.

I know that even though it FEELS like I have always felt this way, and am going to feel this way again probably, that this urge and it's intense emotions and self depracating thoughts and despair WILL pass - usually by the next day even. Usually in those moments because I have felt that way so many times before it's easy to conclude I have felt this way for so long and I'm going to again so it's permanent and I'm so tired of this feeling when in reality it's fleeting.
When I was 17 a childhood friend of mine who I was having an affair with (despite him having a one year old daughter and a son on the way, got hit and killed by a car on his way) walking across the street to buy me cigarettes. Cigarettes I demanded from him because I was young and selfish and wasn't concerned about him or his wife being on her way home and how that may have been his hesitance. There is a teenager out there somewhere who never got to meet his dad, in part because of demands I placed on another person. There is a daughter out there somewhere who doesn't remember how much her dad adored her, who doesn't remember him at all - and I contributed to that.....that's a lot to take in at 17 years old. It took me most of my 20's before I could really grasp that his death wasn't entirely my fault,that the responsibility didn't lie solely with me.

A month after he died I tried to take my own life and had my mom NOT listened to her gut feeling I would be dead. I didn't write a note or tell anyone anything I just swallowed two bottles of Tylenol and when I started getting sick I told everyone it was a stomach bug. My mom had to get an ambulance and police officers to come out to our house and handcuff me to a stretcher and sedate me so they could take me to the hospital and run tests and she did all of that based on mother's intuition. Even then it was over 24 hours later and I rember the doctor coming in to tell me how my liver enzymes were supposed to normal beat 400 or something and how mine were at 40,000 and how they were going to do everything they could but I might get my wish and do before they life flighted me to the nearest children's hospital I needed to say whatever I needed to say to my parents because he wasn't sure if it was too late. It was the first time I ever saw my parents as actual people and not just parents and while it didn't make me wish I was dead any less, it did show me that my actions do affect other people and I was sad for them....until I pulled through and then I was angry for a long time. But that's a whole nother story ... Anyway I said all of that to say....after I physically recovered I was sent to the psych unit and one of the things I remember because I still do it....is that one of the techs who at the time could not understand anything happening that could make a 17 year old girl with her entire life ahead of her want to end it, she told me to keep a record from this point forward she said to make an entry every single time I feel happy, or inspired, or am in awe of something or someone, any time I am grateful, or anything good happens to me or I get to watch or be a part of something that makes me feel alive. She said any time someone says a kind word to me, or tells me my contribution to something or that something I said or did helped them or impacted them or inspired them make an entry of it, write it down, keep an excel, put it on a scrap of paper and put it in a jar somewhere but document it and I have done my best to do that. So when that dark cloud rolls in and looms over me and tells me that I am miserable and worthless and my life is a waste and always has been and always will be....I have proof otherwise. I'd encourage you to do the same.

Hell by the time you finish reading this book of a post it will have passed lol.









 
Like the title says, I want your opinions.
Why is life worth living if everything is fucking misery, suffering and dreadful events.
Why shouldn't I kill myself?
I'm in a dark spot rn and every now and then I keep having suicidal ideations.
Anyone care to refute me?
I have discovered that most suffering is caused by other people.

Change your crowd, and find a hobby that’s not loaded with toxic people. They’re everywhere obviously.

It’s your life, just don’t make it worse for anyone else out of anger.
 
Like the title says, I want your opinions.
Why is life worth living if everything is fucking misery, suffering and dreadful events.
Why shouldn't I kill myself?
I'm in a dark spot rn and every now and then I keep having suicidal ideations.
Anyone care to refute me?
IME, There are no "shoulds" in life (humans construct meaning, but it's not really there).

My humble advice is, try to enjoy and live life the fullest and highest possible, now that you are already here.

When you are dead you will have your rest, bliss and peace time. Can't you wait a little bit? Lol.

Also, psychedelics can be a god-send im this tough moments. I know some people are against of taking psychedelics unless one is in a positive state of mind, but honestly I think is worth the risk if someone is in the verge of suicide. (Also the best psychedelic trips I had was when I was quite desperate with life in a "nihilist" kind of attitude).
 
IME, There are no "shoulds" in life (humans construct meaning, but it's not really there).

My humble advice is, try to enjoy and live life the fullest and highest possible, now that you are already here.

When you are dead you will have your rest, bliss and peace time. Can't you wait a little bit? Lol.

Also, psychedelics can be a god-send im this tough moments. I know some people are against of taking psychedelics unless one is in a positive state of mind, but honestly I think is worth the risk if someone is in the verge of suicide. (Also the best psychedelic trips I had was when I was quite desperate with life in a "nihilist" kind of attitude).
Ikr, thanks 4 the advice. I was in a darker place cpl months ago. Thx anyway 4 ur input.
 
I find Buddhism to be a very dangerous philosophy, because similar to christianity, it is an anti-cosmic religion that associates life with suffering and the world to be something that must be escaped. YOU are here for a reason and that is NOT to learn some lesson and then piss off from this "lowly" realm of "agony" into some ethereal pleroma. The truth is that YOU are here to participate in the world and enjoy it. Think of life as a participatory game, or a sandbox, rather than a place full of limitations and suffering. Simply reframe your perception of life and soon life itself will change. Ideas like Buddhism, Gnosticism, Nihilism, etc. won't help you in preventing suicidal thoughts, because they alienate you from the world around you. Gaslighting people into believing that the world is an illusion is an excellent tool to make them give up on life, isolate themselves from what is happening around them and leave the playing field to power hungry tyrants who want the least amount of resistance from the population.

If you want a philosophy then I suggest you look into pantheism, more specifically material pantheism (the notion that god(s) and all things spiritual are not transcendent or seperate from the world but actually immanent in it).

EDIT: just to prevent misunderstandings, I did not shit on Buddhism as a whole. It has some valuable teachings to live by, but this whole life=suffering idea is very unhealthy and detrimental to a fulfilled life in my opinion. And before some triggered buddhist says that I have no idea of what I'm talking about: I have read the Pali Canon from start to finish and Buddha's teachings basically boil down to that equation...

I agree with you on Christianity and Buddhism. Im not a pantheist though if anything i lean towards existentialism
 
I have a friend who told me, of all things, that fraternities and sororities are all about bonding to become something greater than ourselves (which of course means not encouraging drinking oneself to death just to gain acceptance). I never understood that until recently.

As for Satan/Lucifer I am under the impression that hell is defined as distance from God's love so I would conjecture that Satan/Lucifer (or evil) is a kind of personification of that personhood and being in ourselves - that is, being in a state of distance from God's love that is palpable.

I don't know much about Hinduism but I did read a prayer of Indira's Pearls, which was very helpful in the sense of getting me to let go, float in the ether so to speak, and see spiritual connections with people I've known my whole life and people I love that are no longer with us. I don't know that I ever want to do that again, but I know there is a path forward if I'm willing to take direction and take another look (however much I tell myself I don't want or need to) at the wreckage of my past.
 
I wanna go back in time and slap myself from 2-3 months ago, Life is bloody fucking amazing. Even with its Highs And super duper lows, it's a constant struggle, maties.
I'm slowly getting better and better,
Cheers
Love yall'
nico xoxo
glad to see you are doing better
i hope my body can heal soon as well, really need a miracle. psych med adverse reaction and withdrawal syndromes are no joke and since they directly work on neurotransmitter receptors it's likely gonna take a damn long time for my brain to rewire itself and regulate those receptors again.
 
glad to see you are doing better
i hope my body can heal soon as well, really need a miracle. psych med adverse reaction and withdrawal syndromes are no joke and since they directly work on neurotransmitter receptors it's likely gonna take a damn long time for my brain to rewire itself and regulate those receptors again.
Thanks brother
I know wd is rough shit but give it some time, I've had a 10 year morphine IV dependency which I was finally able to break free from this year. Also my massive crack cocaine addiction which had me act like a fucking lunatic. I don't even smoke cigarettes anymore. I care about my body now, im learning to love myself and to cope life without substances. I still am dependent on clonazepam which is rougher to get clean from but one step at a time.
Everything will pass, time heals
I send u a hug dear brother.
regards
 
glad to see you are doing better
i hope my body can heal soon as well, really need a miracle. psych med adverse reaction and withdrawal syndromes are no joke and since they directly work on neurotransmitter receptors it's likely gonna take a damn long time for my brain to rewire itself and regulate those receptors again.
Which antipeychotic did u have adverse reaction from btw?
 
Which antipeychotic did u have adverse reaction from btw?
I'm under the impression that it takes decades to recover from the damage we do to our bodies over years and years of drug and alcohol abuse, but you never know. Maybe you say something and someone else never forgets it, and says to themselves or you - there's that guy - I remember him. Nothing like going to a 12 step meeting and seeing guys who were basket cases 10 or 20 years ago who walk and talk like fine aged brandy mellowed in the cask, all smooth baby. It doesn't matter what your job was, who you killed or got killed, what drugs you took or didn't take, everybody served, and some of them survived and thrive. Talk about lighting the way, ey?
 
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