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Is it true that nice guys finish last? Or is mostly about looks??

To some extent, many women are attracted to assertive, confident, dominant men. That doesn't mean they have to be assholes.

The problem with "nice guys" ("nice guys" referring to this group, as genuine nice guys are much more deserving of the term and usually have no trouble getting women) is that they often bring nothing else to the table. Yes, they are nice, but that is a pretty basic requirement for not being a terrible human being. If you're not nice then you're some degree of dick. In addition to being nice, you have to be somehow charming, have a talent, have something interesting and special about you.

The contemporary Internet "nice guy" movement, the ones who get "Friendzoned" (how dare she decide who she does and doesn't have sex with! You gave her a ride to that concert!), also feel entitled to affection and sex just for being decent, friendly, and fail to understand that no woman owes them anything, unless there was an explicit agreement that in return for acting like a friend, you get sex. These aren't "nice guys" but misguided, entitled jerks.

It's not that women don't want nice guys, it's that women don't want just nice guys. They want nice guys with a bit of balls and adventurous spirit, or something. But "nice" is not a merit on its own for a romantic relationship.

Back me up on this, ladies?
 
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hendobill said:
single guy, smart, funny, respectful,sincere
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single guy - stay that way, it's better. i've been in relationships but not again till i'm 30+ (3 years) and she must be 18-23.

smart - good

funny - good

respectful - cut that shit out immedietly.

sincere - better to lie when needed.

i'm an ugly bastard (made up a little by my height 6'3") and i've done alright over the years. looks are a HUGE help but while we men ONLY (if we're honest) care about looks when we first meet a girl woman care about that and other qualities.

but ya looks are important, i had a much easier time getting laid while skinny then i do right now, working on that (in the gym every day.)
 
Psychonauticawhatever nice guys are not assertive, confident, dominant.

Nice guys frown on jerks. But they're not really jerks, they just don't suck up to people.

Nice guys go out of their way to please others, because they don't value themselves. They can't say no.

Nice guys are the REAL jerks because rather than have a frank discussion they're passive aggresive.
 
treezy z said:
Psychonauticawhatever nice guys are not assertive, confident, dominant.

Nice guys frown on jerks. But they're not really jerks, they just don't suck up to people.

Nice guys go out of their way to please others, because they don't value themselves. They can't say no.

Nice guys are the REAL jerks because rather than have a frank discussion they're passive aggresive.
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Yep. This is why I distinguish between "nice guys" (whiney, entitled people) and nice guys (guys, of whom you could say "That dude? Yeah, he's nice."). A confident, straight-up dude can be a nice guy, but not a "nice guy". Passive-aggressiveness is definitely a big part of it, as is deception.

Often they never explicitly communicate their romantic interest, but feel shafted when the woman who either hasn't taken the subtle hint, or isn't interested in a passive guy not willing to take initiative. If they were really nice guys they'd do all the nice things just because, not in exchange for an invitation to the pants party. When they don't get this invitation they feel resentment.
 
The funniest thing is when a nice guy calls a girl a slut. Cuz you know he's got feelings.

The biggest "slut" is the one you didn't get to sleep with.
 
Bear in mind there's a big difference between a nice, timid, kinda-effete guy and one that's simply inhibited, gauche, and uncomfortable around other people. The former guy is a craven pushover, while the latter only appears that way because he has an abnormally intense phobia of making a mistake or seeming like a fool in social situations or in public.

The differences between the two are many: one is a pure pansy and the other is plagued with panic; one fears standing up and the other fears standing out; one tries and fails to be what they aren't and the other tries and fails to be who they are; one is a sucker and the other is self-conscious; one is passive-aggressive and the other is perturbed and anxious; one suffers from foibles in their character and the other has a psychiatric disorder; one is fixed by personality modifications and the other is fixed by prescription medications.

The socially anxious guy's true disposition is in many cases only fully apparent when medicated; his true colors are obscured and concealed, otherwise. How he may or may not act when not anxious and reserved is anybody's guess. He might be a nice and amicable guy, or he might be an obnoxious, ill-mannered prick.

With that said, it would be unwise and ignorant to continue on with confusing the two.
 
I'm gonna call it .. Nice guys do finish last. We're hard wired to go for the masculine, dominant, protective & provider type of guy. Nice guys will be doormats, they will do anything for us, & be at our beck & call. They're too available & co-dependent...that's just not sexy.

Rtp
 
Psychonauticunt said:
To some extent, many women are attracted to assertive, confident, dominant men. That doesn't mean they have to be assholes.

The problem with "nice guys" ("nice guys" referring to this group, as genuine nice guys are much more deserving of the term and usually have no trouble getting women) is that they often bring nothing else to the table. Yes, they are nice, but that is a pretty basic requirement for not being a terrible human being. If you're not nice then you're some degree of dick. In addition to being nice, you have to be somehow charming, have a talent, have something interesting and special about you.

The contemporary Internet "nice guy" movement, the ones who get "Friendzoned" (how dare she decide who she does and doesn't have sex with! You gave her a ride to that concert!), also feel entitled to affection and sex just for being decent, friendly, and fail to understand that no woman owes them anything, unless there was an explicit agreement that in return for acting like a friend, you get sex. These aren't "nice guys" but misguided, entitled jerks.

It's not that women don't want nice guys, it's that women don't want just nice guys. They want nice guys with a bit of balls and adventurous spirit, or something. But "nice" is not a merit on its own for a romantic relationship.

Back me up on this, ladies?
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One thing I learned is that being nice makes women being on control and when I´m not interested what happens is exactly the opposite.
I´ve had relationships that I was nice, helpful, caring etc. Women just say they appreciate this but on real life, nice men are screwed IMO.
I have always been nice to women, believe I have nice looks and am genuine and careful.
With time that only spoils the relationship for us and, of course, ladies will deny that because woman are not conscious of that behavior they develop with time.
Now, like I said, if I am not that interested, oh boy, women are all into me. I hate to say that because it seems it´s not true, but unfortunately that is how I see things from so many relationships.
 
Erikmen said:
Now, like I said, if I am not that interested, oh boy, women are all into me. I hate to say that because it seems it´s not true, but unfortunately that is how I see things from so many relationships.
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On a related note, being in a relationship - even if your girlfriend is at home - increases positive attention from women at bars and such by about 200-300%. I guess it's the absence of any insecurity or desperation, and full confidence.
 
def not about looks. I'm considered a good-looking fella by many (i really am not trynna brag im just offering an opinion with details) and I can tell you that the way girls work is probably 40% looks and the rest is their own standards whether it be a nice-guy/bad-ass/etc..

Girls don't throw themselves at me. They flirt with me but I dont trust these hoes and I fall pretty easily and don't like getting hurt so I just rock back and let things happen instead of forcing anything.

Possibly my reputation for being a "druggie" which i'm actually far from and the fact that I don't drive yet cuz I'm too lazy to get my license could be affecting this but as of now it's not all about looks for me.

Girls like confident, funny guys. I've seen some fellas with a very sexy girl who cheated on her for a non-attractive girl and I was like wtf. So It's really all dependant on what a girl looks for in a guy coupled with looks that are definitely not always the deciding factor
 
The differences between the two are many: one is a pure pansy and the other is plagued with panic; one fears standing up and the other fears standing out; one tries and fails to be what they aren't and the other tries and fails to be who they are; one is a sucker and the other is self-conscious; one is passive-aggressive and the other is perturbed and anxious; one suffers from foibles in their character and the other has a psychiatric disorder; one is fixed by personality modifications and the other is fixed by prescription medications.
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Nailed it. Couldn’t really put it into words but its very true.
 
I think if you are not dominant, funny etc. it would be no good to try. You really have to roll with what you got. If you are a psychopath then you can act like anyone at any time. Normal people can't. see this as a resource. Be yourself
 
If you're not dominant lay off the porn and video games. Start lifting weights. Try a sport. Hang with badasses. Take some risks. All this will boost confidence and testosterone. No point in staying the same if it's not working.
 
Too bad there aren't as many "nice" women.

Recent studies (which I don't have citations for) indicate that the single most attractive feature that a man can have (of course, it's really a fairly big, somewhat wide, and very hard dick) is a flat stomach, but even more important than that--not just for sex but definitely for marriage--is how much wealth and how high an income a man has. Being powerful in addition to being rich is also a plus.

"That's just the way it is. Somethings will never change."--2Pac.
 
Dresden, women make up for their lack of physical, mental, and emotional strength with cunning. They have to because there's no way a woman could step to a man as an equal. So yes, there are no "nice" women, even my own mother and sister. You have to love and accept women for what they are, not for some fairy tale bullshit.
 
I've got loads more cunning than the average woman ever will. Besides, being a "nice" person never hurt anybody, man or woman.
 
Yes they do. Only if you are nothing but nice. Girls might not want to admit it. Im not saying be a complete dbag 24-7 but you gotta be both at the same time. Its a fine line to walk
 
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