• Life Advice & Visual Arts Welcome Guest
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    🌌 Share Your Dreams! 🌌
    📸 15 Years of Photo Contests 📸
  • LAVA Moderator: Mysterier

How open are you on the internet?

Tally, I'll just copy and paste a post I already made for someone else:

Well, I bolded the bottom line but I'll clarify it a bit more if that helps. I just want to know how you guys feel about being really open with strangers on the internet and if you ARE open, do you ever worry about someone you know stumbling upon said information and using it against you in any way?

To abridge my personal response(s), I will stick with saying that I am indeed worried about whether or not I am being too open but I struggle with making a decision on whether or not I should remove certain posts because I find myself thinking, "Well, there's nothing I should be ashamed of and I'll be open and forthcoming with anyone who wants to know anything BUT there are so many unreasonable people out there and I wouldn't want my past to affect anyone else's future (i.e. my partner whose career definitely relies on having a good reputation)."
 
donkeyPUNCH said:
I'm way more open about drug related topics on here than IRL. I don't have a good reputation to worry about, and all my friends and relatives know about my past useage but I just don't talk about it as openly simply because IRL isn't the place to discuss the technical details of drug use imo. most people don't care that much.

Ps UNH you will make an excellent trophy wife if you already edit what you say for the sake of his career...
Click to expand...

Haha, I'm trying. I'm even housebreaking myself as we speak (trying to learn how to cook, I've always known how to clean, it's just a matter of maintaining everything--which I do without a second thought now--, etc.). I never thought I'd be saying or doing any of these things, especially not the part where I concern myself with my partner's future reputation. It's weird going from sticking needles in your arms to building credit via buying a house in three years 8o Sometimes I feel like I'm tripping balls, to be honest :p (should I edit that? lawl).

Back on topic though: It's nice that you don't worry, Donkey. It makes a huge difference [for the better] when a person feels like they don't have to defend their existence because of past decisions made, and I agree with you 100% about discussing drugs IRL and online in the way that I won't discuss them "IRL" unless I'm asked specifically about them while I'm more than open online.
 
I've found that if you go into details about any drug without being directly asked you often get a lot of funny looks....

and I do know what you mean about going from sticking needles in your arm to looking at houses and building a "normal" life. I'm going through the same thing with my fiance. it's just her career doesn't depend on her entire life being put under a microscope like I'm sure your man's is. especially if he's an officer, the US gov't wants no part of any personal life drama I'm sure. but either way it's definitely a surreal life change.
 
I think the key to keeping an internet low profile is to stay off of facebook...
 
Yeah, if one is concerned about privacy then not being on FB is a good way to keep things low key and safe. I love FB though--I love talking to and seeing photos of all the people I've known throughout my life--so I am not about to delete my account.

Unlike BL, I do not talk about drug use or post illicit photos on ze FB (well, I don't post illicit photos anywhere anymore) and my account is very private. To be quite honest, I think anyone that posts photos of drugs and shit on FB is just asking for it.

I've also never understood underage people putting up photos of them getting tanked. I wish I could tell some of my younger friends (think below age 18, peoples' younger siblings and such) that those photos are pretty much around for life once they go up and they will seriously regret posting them when they don't get hired for a job or accepted to a school. I just don't think sounding like an uptight grandma type goes over well in that kinda situation. I just hope for the best when I see it happen...
 
Man, the more I read my posts, the more uptight and grandmotherly I come across these days. So weird :p
 
But id rather be a free man in my grave
Than living as a puppet or a slave

images


imo; you need to be able to protect your information just as much as you need to be able to let go of em
 
you actually sound a lot like my fiance UNH.... she is always the one who's telling her younger friends that they should think about their futures more lol...
 
I just keep a fine balance tween the internet and IRL, I say alot in both
 
donkeyPUNCH said:
I can do that....
Click to expand...

yay! Second Opinion thanks you and papa, too!


UNH: i am very open on bluelight in particular; not so much on facebook or other social networking sites where i'm "friends" with people i went to school with or my family.

first, unlike the typical bler, i don't engage in illegal activities - no drug use, etc - so i don't feel that i share anything here that could impact me negatively in my "real" life.

second, and most important, i feel that my experiences even the ones i'm deeply ashamed of, could help others. when i've gone through tough issues it was always comforting to read similar stories so i didn't feel so alone in my struggles... so, i feel indebted to those that were open and i share my issues with the hope of helping someone else down the line.

IRL, i'm painfully shy and guarded. i internalize a lot of my issues. IRL, i feel like there's constant pressure to be a happy, cheerful person. but on bluelight, i feel a sort of camaraderie with most members and feel okay admitting that a lot of times, i'm a real fuckin' Debbie Downer.

in addition, with my experience in getting to know bluelight members, i find most to be so interesting, emotional, thoughtful, tolerant and deep. IRL, when i'm required to be social with my boyfriend's friends' wives/girlfriends, it's chatter about shit that i don't really care about like breast implants and shitty chick-flicks. on bluelight, i feel like i can be candid and honest.
 
User Name Here said:
I am only 22 (turning 23 in three weeks) but I am marrying this man within the next two years and we have already started planning every facet of our lives out accordingly.
Click to expand...

lol l’homme propose et Dieu dispose... or in other words, if you want to make God laugh tell him your plans...

back on topic, I'm open on the internet but I wouldn't post a picture of myself. Maybe i'm paraniod, but it does seem the world's a small place and it's not that what I have to say is particularly interesting or shocking, just that I prefer to remain anonymous.
 
I'm more open online, but then again holding on forth online never feels "real". Sure, that's idiotic, but typing something you wouldn't say in person on a board where nobody knows who the hell you are, even if they've corresponded with you or seen your posts for years, still lacks the punch of saying to a friend or even a disinterested party like a therapist. Then again, there is a great deal I won't talk about in person or online, so maybe the overall effect is even.
 
My family, friends, nor colleagues are not on BL. If they were I doubt I would stick around. I don't talk about this forum.
I am not worried about someone figuring who I am out and reading my shit. This is why I don't reference BL on facebook...unless it is to another member. I am honest here just as I am IRL.

why a pre-nup?
 
I'm pretty open on BL. FB and other sites, not so much. I've only told select individuals about this site and have no plans on telling others, based on how easy it was to tell who I am. :p

But yeah, I treat BL like I would RL--I don't go running around screaming about my issues, but if someone wants to hear about it in a thread, even though it'll be there forever, I'll mention it--Maybe it'll help somebody.

As I've heard my entire life: Never write what you do not want read.
 
Perpetual Indulgence said:
why a pre-nup?
Click to expand...

Because shit happens and it's best to be prepared. We're both incredibly mature and I seriously doubt that IF it doesn't work out, it will result in some sort of immature battle over property and such. However, people are dumb animals--even the best of the best--and I've seen too many seemingly solid marriages crumble and fall. I would never dream of taking anything away from him but I've seen a lot of women do just that, and I can't imagine he would want to take anything from me, even if we were to completely fall apart. It's just better to be safe than sorry. It doesn't mean either of us are worried about anything at all though. If we were this early in the game, there'd be no point in getting married (although people do that anyway and we all know that marriage is little more than a pretty title for many couples as a lot of people don't seem to seriously think through what an actual marriage entails both emotionally and legally :p).

Anyway, I'm just digging this whole taking our time and enjoying the moment thing we've got going on. We know we're getting married but we're not in a hurry as there's no reason to meet a deadline that doesn't exist. Hell, I'm only turning 23 in a couple of weeks and he's 27. No rush to the alter here. I would much rather take an extremely methodical, well thought out approach to everything because we're at a point where serious decisions are being made and I see too many people rush through this part only to end up screwing things up.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top