its strange how people experience drugs so differently. I would never describe benzo's as really being "euphoric" so much, but a lot of people seem to. Maybe it's like with opiates, what I consider euphoric is probably considered an unpleasant side effect to some.
yeah see Ive never seen benzos as euphoric either while some people swear by them. to me it has always been opiates. im on a hell of a drug cocktail now though but I take everything as prescribed and have officially set up a medication schedule and with the schedule I feel amazing all day and sleep like a baby at night. I wake up every morning at 10AM and immediately pop my first 20mg Ritalin LA (long acting). I then enjoy the focus and slight buzz (cause even after 3 years of daily use I still get a mild to moderate euphoria). then at 1 pm I pop my second 20mg Ritalin LA. then I ride that out till anywhere between 3 and 4 (never later then 4) and at this point I take my 20mg Ritalin IR (instant release). this usually lasts me till about 6pm before I start to notice the crash and once I feel fully disgusting and uncomfortable, I pop my 1 mg Ativan (though I plan to switch to klonopin soon because it is more formulated for daily use while as Ativan should really only be taken on an as needed basis, not daily). I then let the Ativan take its full effects for an hour or so until the stimulation from the Ritalin and the feelings of the crash have completely subsided. at this point the only symptom of my Ritalin crash left is the depressed mood. well at this point it is now 7pm and my pain is at its absolute peak (I have severe TMJ) and I then take my 2 Vicodin 750s. I used to take my Ritalin and vicodin at the same time but often found the vicodin cancelled out the effects of the Ritalin and since my pain doesn't even get to a breaking point till around 7pm, I decided to wait till 7. well by about 7:15-7:30, my pain has now pretty much completely subsided and although this isn't why I take it, I feel a moderate amount of warm blanket opiate euphoria. usually 2 750s isn't enough to make me feel euphoric, but the Ativan potentiates it and makes those two pills feel like 5. I then enjoy the next couple hours happy and pain free and then at 9pm I take my 50mg trazadone and 10mg zyprexa. I take the trazadone for sleep and the zyprexa for bi polar disorder (and even though the zyprexa isn't used for sleep, it is a strong non narcotic sedative that will knock anyone out). I used to take the trazadone and zyprexa right before bed but after being on it for 3 years, I have a tolerance and the drowsy effects usually take about 3 hours to take full effect). at midnight, starting to feel drowsy but still not quite ready for bed, I pop 2 more vicodin 750s and my pain which has slowly been returning once again disappears and again I get a moderate sense of euphoria. finally between 1 or 2 AM, I am very sleepy and go to bed, and with the combination of meds, I find that I am asleep in no more then 20 minutes. then up at 10AM again the next day to do it all over again. on a side note, its AMAZING to me how much money I save on those 3 narcotics with a legitimate prescription versus going through a dealer. I take all of my meds exactly as prescribed now for legitimate reasons and although dependent im not addicted (I don't have strong cravings or desire to use for a high) but a couple of years ago I used to use these meds to get high and would go through dealers. I used to pay 30 dollars for 10 20 mg Ritalin LA's, 40 dollars for 10 20mg Ritalin IR's, 15 dollars for 5 1mg ativans, and 20 dollars for 5 Vicodin 750s. so for ten Ritalin LA's, 10 Ritalin IR's, 5 Ativan and 5 vicodin I would easily spend 105 dollars. now for 48 dollars total a month, I get 60 20 mg Ritalin LA's, 30 20mg Ritalin IR's, 30 1mg ativans, and 120 vicodin 750s. basically I get 900 dollars worth of pills on the black market for 48 bucks a month. wowza. anyway, sorry for the long rant, Ritalin makes me want to write and write and write but I will never understand anyone who describes benzos as being euphoric. opiates and amphetamines to me are very euphoric but even if I take like 5mg of Ativan or 100mg of valium, all I notice is I can barely keep my eyes open, my body is relaxed and my head feels sort of light, but theres deffinately no euphoria. maybe if I mixed it with alcohol, but last time I mixed benzos and booze it was DISASTOROUS. took 2mg of Ativan (two pills) out of a full bottle of 30, drank six beers over the course of like 3 hours and went to bed. when I woke up there was vomit EVERYWHERE, along with a completely empty bottle of Ativan, 6 empty beers (for a grand total of 12) and 3 empty bottles of wine. needless to say im very lucky to be alive and also needless to say I will never use this combo again.
