Extremely heavy DMT trip,what to do?

[SoonAJunkie]

hi...a month ago I had a truly heavy dmt trip.I loaded the pipe with a lot of dmt,and smoked it.I broke through very hard. I am sure that I experienced sever ego death,but it started wearing off... The first days after that trip,I felt like the whole world was a lie. That nothing existed.During the dmt trip,I felt like shit,I got extremely tired, I wanted to sleep but didn't know what sleep is,who i am,who my friends and parents are...I don't remember the visuals at all,they were so different from my other dmt trips.I felt like I was dying and born again and again and again....



Now after that trip, I realized that ignorance is a bliss. I'm trying to be as normal as possible, I started watching football again, make friends again,get a girlfriend (that's hard hahahaha), and generally be a normal person with an average life...Needless to say that I have quitted all drugs,well,for now I'm sure I won't do any drugs,let alone dmt...My trip was so terrifying, I was god himself for 15 minutes, I knew everything I Was everything...

Can someone please tell me what to do to make the trip wear off completely.... I don't wanna feel like I don't exist,or life is a lie,it's driving me crazy....


Sorry for the long post

 

[szuko000]

try to realize that the trip was just that, a deep experience that actually had no baring on reality. Sure a very intense trip can cause one to question reality but it is just what we make of it, you are no different now then you were before. What helps me integrate heavy trips is the idea that reality is an image we create, it is no more a lie then it is not. What I mean by that is you can either view it as something fabricated or something more real then the trip you just had. The fact you wake back up into this plane means it is the one you are on for this time and that's about it.

I am sorry if that's confusing I suppose what I am trying to say is yes you had an earth shattering trip but you awake back in the same place you left. Everything is exactly the same and just remember every moment is a gift.

 

[X3DFX]

Stop trying to make the insights from the trip apply to anything outside the trip. In other words just stop touching what you saw in the trip with your mind completely.

 

[:DNA]

You are realer than your experiences. Don't worry, it will pass soon.

 

[Xorkoth]

hi...a month ago I had a truly heavy dmt trip.I loaded the pipe with a lot of dmt,and smoked it.I broke through very hard. I am sure that I experienced sever ego death,but it started wearing off... The first days after that trip,I felt like the whole world was a lie. That nothing existed.During the dmt trip,I felt like shit,I got extremely tired, I wanted to sleep but didn't know what sleep is,who i am,who my friends and parents are...I don't remember the visuals at all,they were so different from my other dmt trips.I felt like I was dying and born again and again and again....

Now after that trip, I realized that ignorance is a bliss. I'm trying to be as normal as possible, I started watching football again, make friends again,get a girlfriend (that's hard hahahaha), and generally be a normal person with an average life...Needless to say that I have quitted all drugs,well,for now I'm sure I won't do any drugs,let alone dmt...My trip was so terrifying, I was god himself for 15 minutes, I knew everything I Was everything...

Can someone please tell me what to do to make the trip wear off completely.... I don't wanna feel like I don't exist,or life is a lie,it's driving me crazy....


Sorry for the long post

This has been my peak experience on psychedelic drugs too, I have had it again and again, the experience of being god, of being the universal consciousness. The thing is, I interpret the experiences as beautiful things. The way I see it, the reality of what existence is and what we are at the core level doesn't have to diminish the importance of the life we are living now. Sure, it may not be the same a what's happening on other levels but this life is a part of what's supposed to be happening too, for some reason we're existing this way right now, so I live my life trying to make the most of how we live now, and become better at being a human and doing human stuff. And when things get tough, I can say, "well, at least I know what's happening now is what's supposed to be happening, and the pain of life is just part of the whole thing."

But, I certainly have had periods of time where I thought "man, ignorance is bliss, it was easier before I knew". Everything in life changes us because our experiences shape who we become, but all in all I am thankful that I was able to see, it brings me a lot of clarity in my life and the idea of it feels exciting and beautiful. It has shaped my beliefs. I wonder how different it could have been if I had been terrified of it and reacted by pushing down and hiding? The way things affects you largely depends on the way you react to those things and whether you can get to a healthy place with them in your mind. I hope my post provides some kind of help you for. It can be tough to integrate a powerful psychedelic experience, when you take psychedelics you have to know that you might have an experience that is going to have a paradigm-shifting effect on you. Change is hard, but toughing through it makes you stronger.

And your post wasn't long at all, fully descriptive posts are best.

 

[Waffle Sock]

Everyone except you are philosophical zombies. Reality only exists because your psyche subconsciously facilitates it. The world is but a shared thought. You are living in a simulation.

 

[chicken hoagie]

been there, done that SoonAJunkie...

Except it was with some LSD sweet tarts that we're "dipped" in liquid LSD(give or take 5-10 hits per tart) in addition to a 70mg vyvanse somewhere in that time... tripped for over 18 hours with my buddies and had to take some klonopin to fall asleep before my parents got home. Needless to say it was the most intense experience of my life, and bare in mind I have taken acid and mushrooms plenty of times before that..

I had no idea how to handle all of the stresses of my reality when I came back..I immediately left my job that I had been at for years, because I knew deep down that I always hated it, but was still a completely irrational move on my part..I was the most depressed I had ever been in my life, failing to integrate what had happened in those 18 hours of craziness..and the trip wasn't all bad either. We had a great time fooling around at my parents until neighbors seemed to have told them we we're getting a little ...wild lol. So they decided to make an early trip back from Alaska to Illinois. Told my parents I hated my life, told my friends I was always depressed, and actually tried resorting to an SSRI, zoloft for the first time.

I was just like you. Nothing seemed to make me happy and life had this sense of complete meaningless..always asking myself questions, feeling as though everything I did was just a waste of time. No enjoyment from anything that I used to be so satisfied with doing..

But as weeks and months went by, I slowly but surely started to feel purpose and motivation again. It's been over 2 years now since that trip, and my friends and I still look back on it as the craziest experience we've ever been through. It took a long time to build myself up, slowly gathering thoughts and recalling events we previously couldn't remember from the trip.. but as days went by, my introspective continued to grow..and I was soon able to man up and trip again for the first time with some mushrooms a year or so later.

and I've never felt so enlightened since then.

Remember man...without sadness;without depression, there is no happiness or satisfaction. That is what makes us human.. Only robots function on one mode of emotion and feeling.

 

[Goddess Mode]

Mm, I am familiar with this kind of DMT trip, though not as intensely as what you experienced. You've got to be careful with that stuff if you're not wanting to change your life.... Ultimately the infinite experience is the same in concept no matter which psychedelic takes you there, but with DMT it is MUCH more intense due to the severity of the trip.... I kind of feel like there are three different stages of psychedelic tripping, where feasibly any psychedelic can give the kind of experience you had, but lighter or party psychedelics like lots of phenethylamines max out at the first level (patterns, faces, objects, etc.), classic powerhouses like mushrooms and LSD max out at the second (visionary states, out-of-body experiences), and DMT maxes out at the third (more hallucinations than you could ever possibly fathom all crammed into one massive constantly transforming mosaic of madness). I actually find that the traditional entity contact kind of breakthrough that people think of personally anyway tends to lie somewhere in the second level; whenever I smoke a massive amount of DMT I tend to get a trip more like you did, but again I haven't gone all the way with it yet, though I want to.... Those high doses honestly kind of remind me of the way 5-MeO-DMT has always been described to me, including the white light, though I haven't gotten to try that yet either....

I would just have to parrot what others have said and point out that these experiences are only what you make of them.... I personally don't believe that they have any real meaning besides exposing the workings of the human mind, in which case there is truly nothing to fear from them... but even if you place your experience into a religious context, I don't see what the issue would be. Doesn't't it just show how incredible this reality really is? I mean I've never been religious in my life, but I was always under the impression that god is supposed to be infinite and that we are all made from him, so I would think that nothing about these experiences should actually be surprising from that viewpoint....

 

[ros1816]

Has anyone ever thought of taking ibogaine - that might put you off drugs forever and sort you right out. I cant find it anywhere for less than £150 which is a lot of money.

It sounds like your DMT experience has put you off the Dr Rugs but it has also put you off life which is ruubbish.

 

[ros1816]

Is there any chance the dmt was actually ibogaine?

 

[xammy]

I'd like to hear how OP is doing nowadays. His post makes me afraid of doing DMT, because I have read similar stories about people feeling the same way you do after the breakthrough experience. Was this your first real psychedelic ego death or have you done high doses of other psychedelics before?

Hope you're feeling better. I feel weird a few days after high dose LSD trip but after that I'm back to normal.

 

[Goddess Mode]

About ibogaine: Not even slightly. Two drugs completely different worlds apart in effect, duration, dose, and administration. It is a good option for breaking addiction though, though no one I've known to take it has stopped taking the good drugs.

 

[pmoseman]

I'd say you've given raw sensations the unfit significance of believing that you knew everything.

If you had known everything then life must ultimately must be futile and unfulfilling.

Drop the false belief, your judgement of what is everything has no meaning. It was a hollow experience and life lies outside of the false boundaries you have created.

 

[malakaix]

I think every psychonaught has at one point or another reached this level of realization; for better or worse..

I had an experience almost five years ago now with DMT that impacted me at the most fundamental level of my being. I witnessed myself as a reflection of consciousness beaming out into infinity, time ceased to exist.. there was no end and no beginning, the very nature of reality unraveled through spectacular paradoxical form before collapsing in on itself into an infinite point in space and time where all of duality came into a single moment that encompassed everything.

Five years on, and i can't say the experience has left me.. perhaps i'm the exception here; but i still struggle with my own existential issues.. the experience liberated me from myself and allowed me to pursue my own interests without conviction, however unless you are willing to accept total responsibility for your life.. not having that pre-existing structure of values, morals and beliefs to fall back on that was stripped from you can leave you in a place of void. Much like a prisoner been released from years of imprisonment been unable to adjust and integrate back into society.. the freedom so desperately sought after quickly becomes it's own form of shackles around your life, because you're overwhelmed with the agonizing truth that nothing actually matters... which is why it's important to identify and establish value; this will provide the platform for purpose and meaning.

Im still searching for what i value in life.. i've been lead down the path of extreme hedonism, money, power and sex, and for a time i didn't understand why i was drawn to this but you can't truly know what you value without experiencing both sides of the coin; you're now in a position to question what you really value in life without constraint.

 

[pmoseman]

Consider the cure for cancer. If you knew everything you would know the cure for cancer and that would certainly be fulfilling.

It would be an amazing life, you would have the Nobel prize and essentially have as much money as you desired and lots of prestige and success in many other areas of science as well. You would have significant answers to philosophical questions. The list goes on. You would rewrite history.

You must believe that you skipped over the more obvious knowledge, like knowing how to win a Nobel prize, and went straight away into learning that the Nobel prize, saving lives, and having a good life are completely insignificant.

Nobody skips over learning how to save all of humanity unless they are just a self-absorbed douche-bag of mega-proportions. You only had the illusion of "getting" everything.

The idea that everything is meaningless only supports your delusion of intellectual perfection. Life is significant and you are inept in dealing with it, so you convince yourself it isn't important; otherwise, why would you be unable to stop it?

 

[theacidtest]

Experiences like that will always be difficult to integrate, particularly if you went into the experience not expecting some sort of life changing realization. While I've never had a DMT trip quite that intense, I've tripped on LSD hard enough that coming back to earth was a difficult experience in some ways. A good psychedelic experience can totally alter the way you look at reality forever. I'm sorry I don't have any better advice, more of just an affirmation that what you're experiencing is normal.

 

[malakaix]

The idea that everything is meaningless only supports your delusion of intellectual perfection. Life is significant and you are inept in dealing with it, so you convince yourself it isn't important; otherwise, why would you be unable to stop it?

Well, fundamentally it's neither significant or meaningless.. but it can be interpreted to be either. A depressed person will see the world as a meaningless reality void of substance and depth, while a person with self-fulfillment will perceive life as significant, meaningful and beautiful. In this circumstance, the impact from such a mind shattering experience brought on by DMT has left the individual in a sort of existential crisis..

I'm not sure if you're post was directed at me, but perhaps i am inept with dealing with it.. i do consider life to be significant, but i can also appreciate the meaningless of it and that in itself is calming.. because i have no expectation to live up to except for the one i create.. and i am aware of that, and that awareness gives me the freedom to define life and create value where i see fit, independent of everything else.

 

[pmoseman]

It was not directed at you but it seems to apply.

Your value system is derived the same way as mine. You work for essentials like food and beyond that you can have your pick. Stay in your room ordering take-out and pissing in bottles or go out water skiing everyday. Whatever you can afford to do.

Whether life is significant, insignificant, both, or neither, is not something you know.

This experience of depression following drug use is not an existential crisis. Questioning your place and redefining who you are with new knowledge is not necessarily depressing; it can actually be fairly exciting. The drugs themselves are responsible for the user to feel like shit, obviously; they alter your mood directly.

 

[phuckingnutz]

I'd say you've given raw sensations the unfit significance of believing that you knew everything.

If you had known everything then life must ultimately must be futile and unfulfilling.

Drop the false belief, your judgement of what is everything has no meaning. It was a hollow experience and life lies outside of the false boundaries you have created.

Consider the cure for cancer. If you knew everything you would know the cure for cancer and that would certainly be fulfilling.

It would be an amazing life, you would have the Nobel prize and essentially have as much money as you desired and lots of prestige and success in many other areas of science as well. You would have significant answers to philosophical questions. The list goes on. You would rewrite history.

You must believe that you skipped over the more obvious knowledge, like knowing how to win a Nobel prize, and went straight away into learning that the Nobel prize, saving lives, and having a good life are completely insignificant.

Nobody skips over learning how to save all of humanity unless they are just a self-absorbed douche-bag of mega-proportions. You only had the illusion of "getting" everything.

The idea that everything is meaningless only supports your delusion of intellectual perfection. Life is significant and you are inept in dealing with it, so you convince yourself it isn't important; otherwise, why would you be unable to stop it?

It was not directed at you but it seems to apply.

Your value system is derived the same way as mine. You work for essentials like food and beyond that you can have your pick. Stay in your room ordering take-out and pissing in bottles or go out water skiing everyday. Whatever you can afford to do.

Whether life is significant, insignificant, both, or neither, is not something you know.

This experience of depression following drug use is not an existential crisis. Questioning your place and redefining who you are with new knowledge is not necessarily depressing; it can actually be fairly exciting. The drugs themselves are responsible for the user to feel like shit, obviously; they alter your mood directly.

Damn P., you are without a doubt the most literal person I know of..."I knew everything" I was everything"....if he says he was and did just go with it.
I mean the OP has this major trip followed by a personal crisis...at least he perceives it as such, and all you can do is try and show everybody what a big brain you have...all the while, deriding and chastising all who dare disagree with the "Great and Powerful P."
Drop the pretenses and join the human race brother.

I know i'll probably get banned or reprimanded for this, but it was worth it...

 

[pmoseman]

I really don't think you should be reprimanded for anything you said.

I think it is to be taken literal. Wishing to return to gnorance and having 15 minutes of knowing and being everything sounds literal to me.

The word ego-death is used to describe any number of phenomena and this was clearly a psychotic break and the person is suffering amnesia and should really seek out some medical care and social support for their illness.