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Do girls care about anything anymore?

girls don't care that you're in a band and that you play guitar n shit?

whewww - you are doing something wrong. as someone whom also used to tour the US n shit, you are doing something completely wrong. I mean, that's like half of the reason to even be in a good band?
 
Who would have thought young girls would look beyond appearances and actually care about personality?

Alpha, beta, queer or straight, it comes down to whether or not someone finds you interesting and worth their while socially.

Or you could get a real job. Bitches love dudes who are loaded and can provide more than free backstage passes.
 
pofacedhoe said:
yeah well at 30 i look at my generation and think WTF too all the time. its not generation even more just that most people are simple and dont really see a bigger picture beyond their immediate wants.
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I wonder if this is the cumulative impact of technology essentially providing instantaneous gratification in many ways.

I've seen women out in a bar or social setting flicking through Tinder on their phone; never-mind that there's actual men around.. the fixation is on the validation they receive through the app. Now perhaps the men in the immediate vicinity are unattractive, boring or unappealing in some manner and Tinder provides the opportunity to meet up with someone else close-by in the same night.. i still find the whole situation strange and amusing.

I think the bottom line here is, women have options.. endless options; all they need is a smartphone with an okCupid app, Tinder, FB etc.. and they now have access to hundreds of men interested in them where they can pick and choose; so if your not immediately interesting in that moment out at a bar or you make some minor mistake in something you say, you'll be written off because.. there's plenty more options ready and waiting.
 
malakaix said:
I think the bottom line here is, women have options.. endless options; all they need is a smartphone with an okCupid app, Tinder, FB etc.. and they now have access to hundreds of men interested in them where they can pick and choose; so if your not immediately interesting in that moment out at a bar or you make some minor mistake in something you say, you'll be written off because.. there's plenty more options ready and waiting.
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Men have "endless options" too - if you want to look at dating + technology in that way. If the option you are persuing isn't working, try something else.
I mean, i hear some men complain that women have some kind of advantage in these situations, but the way i see it, that is either
a) fair enough
or
b) a matter of perception.

Internet dating does seem to take a lot of the romance out of dating/sex/meeting people etc - but i think you'll find plenty of women and men that either want to play that game, or don't - as the case may be.
Choosing not to engage with these sorts of things can work in your advantage too, or at least potentially save you from VD ;)

OP, i think you'll find that 'girls' do care about plenty. But you're still very young, and thus are talking about girls; not women. As you get older some of the mysteries of why potential dates pass you by will become clearer - or maybe not.
But just because you see yourself as having the external elements required to attract female interest, it doesn't mean the opposite sex feel the same way. Maybe the "weird geeky or boring" guys are more fun, interesting or deep than the persona you're putting out there. Identity can be as fluid as you want it to be - you can always reinvent yourself when you find yourself in a different social environment and see how that works, whilst still being true to yourself.
That shouldn't be too hard for someone with a performing arts background, and is a great ability for musicians to possess.

Ultimately though, you're still in high school. High school dudes in bands might not instantly interest the ladies...but stick with it.
It really isnt a competition about who is "best" or has the most of whatever - it's about the person you are and what you can offer someone as a friend, lover or boyfriend.
The stereotypes of musicians getting all the girls aren't true for everyone, and the kind of girls that only sleep with musicians might not be the kind of girls you want to meet either. What i've found about playing music (i've played in a lot of bands) or following whatever path my interests take me down - is that it has opened me up to social networks of likeminded people; and friendships and relationships have followed from there.
It's not about status, it's about meeting the right people.
My 2 cents, anyway.
 
I consider myself someone who has had equal success and disappointment from girls. Though I haven't had the best of luck when it comes to pursuing them, plenty have pursued me so it kind of even things out. As such, I've never been one to adhere to social norms when it comes to guys chasing girls. I've been essentially forced to let them come to me.

Girls do care. They care about a lot actually. Even the ones around your age who seemingly care about nothing other than what they are going to eat and drink, where they're going to sleep, and fucking the guy they want; many still hold values of substance for their family, friends, education, and even finances. It's easy to think that they don't care, when you are they one they don't care about, and even then that might not necessarily be true. A girl who won't fuck you might be doing you a huge service, which I have found out from my own experience.

They are also complex creatures. A girl is just as capable to turn down a guy who has everything she wants as she is to turn down a guy who has nothing she wants. They very likely share your disappointment as at some point they have likely experienced having to deal with the guy they want, not wanting them, and probably also had to deal with the intrusive thoughts of all the other girls who are fucking him. Again, showing that they DO care. I just don't want you to make the same mistake I have in the past with both idealizing and devaluing girls. You can't think white and black about them because they are very much gray. You also have to recognize your patterns in your failures and break them if you want to have success.

I wish people in high school would just focus on high school. There is so much time to worry about this shit afterwards. Trust me, at 38 years of age I know about that all too well. You have a lot going for you, and think there is a lot of bearing into what a poster said about some guys having a 'specific' kind of attraction and others not having it. I never had that 'it' factor when it comes to getting the girl I pursue. I acquire their attraction in other ways and perhaps this is the case for you as well. I think my success with girls has come by playing my strengths, and chasing them isn't one of them. I think if you focus on your music, school, and tour, essentially making yourself unavailable, you just might gain the interest of girls who wish you were.
 
First reply here Had to stop bye and say Dude Get an older Girl/Woman. If a few high school girls got ya down. Forget about them and find yourself a few older Flings. Some hot mama or a stripper/college chic that will wear ya out and praise the ground you walk on. Don't ever let anyone get ya down There will be plenty of time for that shit once your older and you get ur first Marriage and divorce out of the way and shes got the kids and all of ur stuff. That's all I was with throughout my teens and 20s. 5 to 15yrs older because its sounds like where your at
 
Give it some time brother. Playing an instrument will definitely get you laid by all types of women; some of which can be undesirable even if they are 'hot'. Don't focus on the self-centered types. There's a lot of really good chicks out there man. It's not all about success or anything like that, it's about self confidence and knowing yourself. Keep doing what you do, put some work in, and you will find yourself in a meaningful relationship if that's what you want. If you just want some ass, step your game up. Girls like nice guys too, they just want them to be confident more than anything.
 
Yeah I think the keyword here is "girls" and even then the original poster is still making some huge blanket statements.

I mean its obvious from the post that this dude is in High School, so right away that means you are talking to a very limited amount of girls who are all still immature and trying to figure shit out. And even then maybe this has more to do with the type of girl you are hitting on. Maybe instead of going after the hotties you should try to find someone with common interests, find a chick in a band or something. You talk about going out to get numbers with your friends but at that age its not like you can hang out in bars or anything so I am curious where you plan on picking up chicks.

Anyways, as another lady said in the thread, its not that women only care about themselves, its more like the really hot or "popular" ones def tend to be self centered. I suggest you try finding a down to earth chick, there are PLENTY of them out there.
 
spacejunk said:
Men have "endless options" too - if you want to look at dating + technology in that way. If the option you are persuing isn't working, try something else.
I mean, i hear some men complain that women have some kind of advantage in these situations, but the way i see it, that is either
a) fair enough
or
b) a matter of perception.

Internet dating does seem to take a lot of the romance out of dating/sex/meeting people etc - but i think you'll find plenty of women and men that either want to play that game, or don't - as the case may be.
Choosing not to engage with these sorts of things can work in your advantage too, or at least potentially save you from VD ;)

OP, i think you'll find that 'girls' do care about plenty. But you're still very young, and thus are talking about girls; not women. As you get older some of the mysteries of why potential dates pass you by will become clearer - or maybe not.
But just because you see yourself as having the external elements required to attract female interest, it doesn't mean the opposite sex feel the same way. Maybe the "weird geeky or boring" guys are more fun, interesting or deep than the persona you're putting out there. Identity can be as fluid as you want it to be - you can always reinvent yourself when you find yourself in a different social environment and see how that works, whilst still being true to yourself.
That shouldn't be too hard for someone with a performing arts background, and is a great ability for musicians to possess.

Ultimately though, you're still in high school. High school dudes in bands might not instantly interest the ladies...but stick with it.
It really isnt a competition about who is "best" or has the most of whatever - it's about the person you are and what you can offer someone as a friend, lover or boyfriend.
The stereotypes of musicians getting all the girls aren't true for everyone, and the kind of girls that only sleep with musicians might not be the kind of girls you want to meet either. What i've found about playing music (i've played in a lot of bands) or following whatever path my interests take me down - is that it has opened me up to social networks of likeminded people; and friendships and relationships have followed from there.
It's not about status, it's about meeting the right people.
My 2 cents, anyway.
Click to expand...

Great post spacejunk and the other guy who spoke about the use of technology.

I've been single for about 3 months now and have been using Tinder. It is both good and bad. It certainly has taken the emotional investment out of dating - for both parties. Before when you were limited to who you could chat to at a nightclub or what person a friend could hook you up with, people were more willing to give others a chance and to ride things out and see what happens. I think that dating apps like Tinder do make people seem expendable a bit. Everyone (both men and women - providing that they are at least somewhat attractive) can simply start swiping and get talking to someone else. Some weeks it gets to the stage where I simply don't have the time to go on 3 dates with different women. That said, every girl I have been out with has had the same options and has had plenty of choice when it comes to men. More than both genders had before this whole online dating thing took off.

To the OP:
Women certainly do care. I'm almost 30 and I can tell you there are SO many women out there who can hold a decent conversation, are interested in finding a man who is compatible with them and who are not self-absorbed and self centred.

In your situation there appears to be two things working against you. 1) your age and the age of the girls you chase. Obviously, teenagers are going to be a bit self-absorbed and have difficulty with flirting etc. You guys just haven't had the whole experience with it that adults have had. Further. teenagers are definitely overly self-conscious, self-focused and less socially aware than adults. It is a matter of experience and also just part of your psychological development. 2) if you have all these impressive things going for you and yet you are still struggling with girls, then maybe you haven't gotten to the stage where you a good at talking to women yet. A lot of it is learnt through trial and error and practice. When I was a teenager, I sucked at talking to women. Even girls who were interested in me, I blew it. It was a mix of not knowing how to act, what to say and not reading situations right. Also, ignoring the girls who were interested in me in favour for the ones that I thought were 'super hot' - even though the girls who were interested were perfectly fine. Now, conversation is so much easier, I have much more self-confidence in myself, I am a more interesting person than when I was younger with more going on, I have a greater empathy and understanding for what women (and people in general want) and I am WAY better at showing that I am interested.

Someone before was talking about this 'alpha scent' or something similar. I think there is a lot of truth in that but it comes down to being self-confident and knowing what you want. Lots of women want a good guy. However, many perfectly nice guys are timid and afraid to either chat to women or to try and seduce them. If you can talk to women confidently, flirt with them, let them know that you are attracted to them, whilst still being interesting, listening to them and being respectful too them - then you are way ahead of the game.
 
Youre young, youre in high school, you dont have enough life experience to understand women. Especially not young girls transitioning into womanhood. You sound entitled, like you believe you deserve this swarm of beauties around you simply due to your status and social connections. Its quite possible young women can see right through your subtle flaunting of your lifestyle and access, and understand your underlying motive, which kind of kills any mystery about you and reduces you to the position of any other guy trying to bark up their trunk. Perhaps you should accept that other people have very different standards than you, and that some people value things that you dont, and dont value things that you do. Its quite presumptuous to assume they dont "care about anything" just because their framework for gauging attraction is different than yours.

You really need to learn to connect with women more, and understand what it is they need in a given moment, before assuming that what they need is what you have. I would suggest you commit the remainder of your boyhood to discovering the mysteries and wonder of feminine power. Study your waves of feminism and seek the wisdoms of ancient sexual yoga. This moment will make perfect sense to you years from now.

:|

Felonious Monk said:
You're like 17. Work on yourself and it'll happen. Girls that are 17 don't have to care about anything, they're still children.
Click to expand...

Yah it sounds like youre assuming way too much, in regards to how the women around you think, and perceive you in general.

axl blaze said:
girls don't care that you're in a band and that you play guitar n shit?

whewww - you are doing something wrong. as someone whom also used to tour the US n shit, you are doing something completely wrong. I mean, that's like half of the reason to even be in a good band?
Click to expand...

I was thinking the same thing. Srsly dude, fuck you for being a musician and not taking advantage of that properly.
 
Ever think it was your personality?

You seem like an insecure, arrogant, self-indulging asshole.

You are not defined by your job. Get a personality and some humility. They--well, hopefully at least one, will come...eventually.
 
Too many douche-bag guys out there giving too many girls attention. So, too many girls become over-valued. A lot of 4-6's think they're really 10's, but they're really not. A lot of these girls can't pick up a decent guy, and they wonder why & become confused. A lot of folks (both men & women) get really confused like yourself.

So, it disrupts the whole bell-curve. Thanks to the douche-bag guys :) They're the one's that started it :D
 
Girls these days are useless, fuck em and duck em don't wife no ho

It's too bad because a lot of the older guys I know have wives who seem like decent enough people, older female relatives are OK etc
 
Teabag Johnny said:
Too many douche-bag guys out there giving too many girls attention. So, too many girls become over-valued. A lot of 4-6's think they're really 10's, but they're really not. A lot of these girls can't pick up a decent guy, and they wonder why & become confused. A lot of folks (both men & women) get really confused like yourself.

So, it disrupts the whole bell-curve. Thanks to the douche-bag guys :) They're the one's that started it :D
Click to expand...

Maybe too many people are judging each other solely on looks while simultaneously obsessing over their own exterior and putting on a front to attract a "9" or a "10" that people forget that relationships are about way more than looks and the front comes down fast. Men are equally guilty of this.

Maybe if you stopped treating women like a number on a scale you'd get a date.

treezy z said:
Girls these days are useless, fuck em and duck em don't wife no ho

It's too bad because a lot of the older guys I know have wives who seem like decent enough people, older female relatives are OK etc
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pshh whats older, 25?
 
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