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Did I blow it with a "unicorn"?

Just really concerned about generally having unhealthy thoughts about women.
 
It’s like an onion. The more you peel the more it stinks.
 
So, after going through this thread, I have questions; is it more attractive to be the girl with weird passions, or is it more pleasing to meet a girl with normal passions?
I like music, art, sex, too, I just have a lot of quirky passions that are a turn off to the average guy. But now I’m thinking I should be perhaps less quirky.
I put a bio up on that free Facebook dating site for just under 12 hours, then I closed it, about 6 months ago. The creepy stalker Swedish guy I attracted took awhile to get rid of.
Also, I always include pictures that are not my best. No sense looking better than I might everyday.
Thoughts?
 
Man I really wish I didnt fail my suicide attempt last year. Fuck men who disrespect women and view them as objects....
 
I think to blow it with a unicorn you actually have to meet said human and actually fuck it up. mNot just have an online fancy for them and not pursue.
 
G_Chem said:
Frankly too these posts are frustrating, as I think Wizard said, when you obsess over a gal like this calling her a unicorn and really not respecting her disinterest in you, it shows you look at her more as an object you obtain than a person. How do you think she’d feel to know some guy she rejected is years later still wondering the what ifs on whether it was ever meant to be, when you simply crushed on her over IG.
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Fiori di Bella said:
You remind me of fans/groupies of musicians and actors who believe that if only they were able to spend time with the star, that person would drop everything and everyone, and hit life’s restart button with the fan/groupie.
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Man, I have to be honest, I read through all of these replies and I really fail to see how OP is objectifying women or "disrespecting" his love interest. OP claims he stopped talking to this particular woman as soon as he got the hint, which is a sign someone actually respects women. And just speaking as a woman myself who has had many bad experiences being objectified and dehumanized in college, OP does seem to take into account her thoughts and feelings, which shows that he sees her as a human being. I really don't think it's fair to gang up on someone and scrutinize them in this manner just because someone has abnormal feelings of unrequited love, and I know there's a lot of valid hysteria today over misogynistic and entitled young men, whom have unhealthy views about women, but to try to pigeonhole OP as such when he only gave a personal account of his situation, and don't know what he's actually like in real life really isn't fair and could do harm to such a person (he mentioned attempting suicide in his last post!) OP mentions struggling to get over a girl he had good vibes about, because he is having trouble finding someone else who excites him, and it's natural to feel this way, even if it's unhealthy. It has nothing to do with his character and it just isn't productive to compare him to obsessed groupies.

Now OP! I do think everyone is right about you idealizing her. Even if you don't think she's perfect, you feel like she might be perfect for YOU, and you don't know that for sure (and I think you recognize this, but it's hard for you considering you've struggled to find women who excite you, as you mention) And in this type of situation I think it it totally natural to idealize, considering you never really met her in person, never will have the chance, and given the way you feel about this it's making those thoughts stew. It sounds like you're trying to keep these thoughts in check, which is great! As for finding women you like...continue putting yourself out there. Someone mentioned lowering your standards, which helps some people, but it really depends on the person. Just based on what you posted I assume you tried doing this before and it wasn't your cup of tea. If that's the case, by all means, keep going for what excites you! People say to be yourself, but if you're having trouble finding someone you like, you may want to revise your strengths and find ways to stand out over others. Luck does play a factor in finding someone as well, so put yourself in as many situations as possible!

Best of luck OP, and I hope you're getting help with your mental health and suicidal thoughts! You matter!
 
ToriTransmundane said:
Man, I have to be honest, I read through all of these replies and I really fail to see how OP is objectifying women or "disrespecting" his love interest. OP claims he stopped talking to this particular woman as soon as he got the hint, which is a sign someone actually respects women. And just speaking as a woman myself who has had many bad experiences being objectified and dehumanized in college, OP does seem to take into account her thoughts and feelings, which shows that he sees her as a human being. I really don't think it's fair to gang up on someone and scrutinize them in this manner just because someone has abnormal feelings of unrequited love, and I know there's a lot of valid hysteria today over misogynistic and entitled young men, whom have unhealthy views about women, but to try to pigeonhole OP as such when he only gave a personal account of his situation, and don't know what he's actually like in real life really isn't fair and could do harm to such a person (he mentioned attempting suicide in his last post!) OP mentions struggling to get over a girl he had good vibes about, because he is having trouble finding someone else who excites him, and it's natural to feel this way, even if it's unhealthy. It has nothing to do with his character and it just isn't productive to compare him to obsessed groupies.

Now OP! I do think everyone is right about you idealizing her. Even if you don't think she's perfect, you feel like she might be perfect for YOU, and you don't know that for sure (and I think you recognize this, but it's hard for you considering you've struggled to find women who excite you, as you mention) And in this type of situation I think it it totally natural to idealize, considering you never really met her in person, never will have the chance, and given the way you feel about this it's making those thoughts stew. It sounds like you're trying to keep these thoughts in check, which is great! As for finding women you like...continue putting yourself out there. Someone mentioned lowering your standards, which helps some people, but it really depends on the person. Just based on what you posted I assume you tried doing this before and it wasn't your cup of tea. If that's the case, by all means, keep going for what excites you! People say to be yourself, but if you're having trouble finding someone you like, you may want to revise your strengths and find ways to stand out over others. Luck does play a factor in finding someone as well, so put yourself in as many situations as possible!

Best of luck OP, and I hope you're getting help with your mental health and suicidal thoughts! You matter!
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Well i do appreciate a different view point, obviously I’m not a woman but when this thread popped up I did actually ask a number of women in my life about this topic. They all seemed disturbed by the idea of someone they talked to only a couple times would then continue to obsess about them years later. He said himself years later he’s still thinking about their sexual compatibility, that’s not right by any stretch of the imagination and is clearly a sign of obsession.

In the end I backed off as did others because he mentioned his suicidal thoughts. While I feel for him in that regard it doesn’t negate the fact that he crushed over some girl that didn’t know him, went for it and got denied, then continued to dwell on the what ifs and thinking “just maybe” and even worse contemplating whether they’d still be a good match in bed is just plain weird. To me, and many others, that’s not respecting her wishes. She made her wishes very clear by ghosting him.

-GC
 
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