CBDizzle: I am so sorry to hear about the trials and tribulations in your life. I am grateful that you had the motivation to reach out and post here on this chronic pain thread... BL is my main source of support and encouragement around my chronic pain issues, as my lifestyle mirrors yours in some ways.
I retired early due to my pain issues... every time I am active, I pay for it by needing to prop up my knee and ice it. Sometimes the pain is so bad that it takes a few days to get back to functioning at my baseline. Ironically, my latest injury occurred in California... I read that is where you live. I don't know if you saw my post, but I was so awed with Venice Beach and the 3rd ST Promenade area of Santa Monica on a visit in May of this year, that I walked and walked. I ended up in excruciating pain right in the middle of a walk looking at the stars in the sidewalk in Hollywood. I hobbled back to the bus, back to my AirBnB residence, and just cried.
I injured the tendons/ligaments surrounding my arthritic knees by walking incorrectly due to the existing pain. Every day I pray that this latest injury has healed, but no. Today, I had to mow my lawn... it was getting out of hand. I actually am laying here, with ice on my knee, and have just finished watching TMZ... that is the closest I will get to Cali in a while, I am afraid. I also enjoy Dateline, and try not to miss the local and national evening newscasts... I watch the Justice network at times... a show called Southern Justice actually lifts my spirits... I guess I can enjoy other sub cultures of America via my television. The point is: I isolate often... I just don't have a reason to go out often, and I guess I am dysphoric due to the pain constantly dragging my mood down. People don't seem to want to be around me... other than family. I did not have that problem before my pain issues became such an everyday part of my life. So, thank you for posting!
RTP: I don't think it was me that discussed ketamine lozenges to you... the only form of ketamine that I use is a special topical ointment that is made in a compounding laboratory here in the US. Ketamine is the main ingredient, and the lotion also includes gabapentin and several other ingredients. It is very expensive, and of course, my health insurance does not cover it... it does not cover any custom prescription created in this compounding pharmacy. However, I will be applying it shortly. After I get done icing my knee, my next step is to apply the lotion. Along with my pain medication, this makes my knee pain bearable enough so that I can get up at least for short periods of time.
Thank you for your post... I may need to discuss my depressive issues with my doctor. I am so happy for you that you found an anti-depressant that works for you! Did you have to do a trial of several first, or were you prescribed Effexor right from the start?
I recall your posts when I first joined BL when you would run out of your pain meds early, and then you would use Lyrica to hold you over. I honestly did not think I would be in that situation myself in such a short period of time, but here I am... and with the Feds breathing down the doctor's necks, I am on a much lower dose than was allowed even two years ago, and will probably never be able to have it raised. I am realistic... I will probably ride this merry-go-round every month until something changes.
I am grateful for BL so that I process these feelings and thoughts, move through them, get and give support and encouragement, and get my mood somewhat positive. My mood is pretty good right now, after reading BL, as well as the fact I did finish mowing my lawn (yea!), and the ice has decreased my pain in my knee.
