Are certizine and diphenhydramine like antipsychotics in causing stimming beh

[Scrofula]

I had pancreatits in 2006....brutal abdominal pain and a week in the ICU. Cried? Hell yes I cried!

Thank you beek. Yeah the best I heard was finally getting wheeled in to my room, knowing the second shot of dilaudid was coming and I could finally maybe sleep, and the nurse barking orders, like "get the fuck out the way! Pancreatitis!"

Of course, it also means we have something in common with John Ashcroft. Which is weird.

 

[d1nach]

This is going to sound really ignorant but have no idea what your pancrease is.

 

[Scrofula]

Me its 3 am in the morning i dont remember how i got here sitting watching hannah montana jacking off with some lanolin nodding in and out on my kinolopin while im at the formotta inn.

You're fifteen hours into the future? PDT is GMT -7, so another eight hours puts you as another New Zealander. I'm suddenly picturing you as a 350 pound Maori. With the tats.

I understand you're trying to self-medcate, it's just there are better options than something with such strong anti-cholinergic effects. I mean, weed is a much better alternative, at the least. Still very anti-cholinergic if you like the time-slowing-down part.

 

[d1nach]

I like that it makes me fearless so i can do whatever i need to do like chug down milk fluids and food when im feeling like i cant. It makes me feel like an animal for just a few hours which says "what the actual f*** has your dumba** been doing you need food and water and electrolytes now"

 

[Scrofula]

This is going to sound really ignorant but have no idea what your pancrease is.

An endocrine/exocrine organ located under your stomach. It's known for producing insulin, but it also has a major role in producing digestive enzymes. For reasons that doctors like to blame on alcohol but I deny still, those digestive enzymes can become activated too soon, ie., while still in your pancreas. So you start digesting yourself.

It tends to hurt a lot when that happens.

Prognosis can be pretty dire actually. Long hospital stay is normal.

 

[d1nach]

Hi everyone today i set a rule i worked from 3:42 to 11:42 - cleaning doing chores around the house and stuff i didnt want to do around the house going hard until i felt tired logging everything.

Then 11:44 stopped logging and cleaning stopped checking for any emails or answering any nonfriend and family member calls till tommorow.


I feel infinitely better now balancing resting and working so that i feel confident in myself but not to where im snapping due to stress.


I really appreciate all your input. K

 

[d1nach]

I love this alot more than just getting messed up i remember my day and when i look back im proud of what i did instead of guilt feeling discusting like when you are able to buy cake so u eat twelve cakes and vomit all over cause cake tastes good yo. I honestly have no idea wtf ive been doing with mylife just getting high and watching stupid videos of fights and watching porn

 

[Scrofula]

THat's a pretty fast turnaround, in just nine hours. Good for you.

 

[d1nach]

I accidently clicked on a vlog of one of my favorite female artists i listen to messed up for comfort when im scared and when she said she doesnt get high and started talking about women and how she feels and how when she considers getting tipsy its two glasses of wine not bottles it really just felt like o was in a fishbowl and someomeone just took a hammer to it because i saw she was not high i was high but she was happier then me which goes against everything about how i see things from a strictly biochemical and math based equation that can be measured and quantified. So i actually spent all day just listening to her vlogs then all the vlogs of all the pornostars and other females i would use in my endless hedonistic drug fulled delirium and i realized i felt just as happy listening to them talk about womens rights or what they feel or lwhat they bought they like and why or a random story as when i am watching their porno or listening to them sing.

 

[Scrofula]

So which did you do, a dozen bendadryl and listen to shit-metal, eight benadryl and chores for nine hours, in which you checked email and made phone calls too, or listened to a pop star on youtube?

 

[d1nach]

Yea basically today i am on which i took approximately 6-8 hours ago orally without tampering in two doses 120 min apart
55 mg of adderall xr
Modafinil 200 mg
Lithium 750 mg
Diphenhydramine 175 mg
Dxm 40 mg

With

(8 g of green tea
240 ml ( coffee ground extracted ) (*this is equal to 16 cups of coffee which is way beyond what is recommended by the fda and is potentially fatal in some ) in three divided doses each 2-3 hours apart through polarity fractional distilation and color run through extra fine filters to produce a oil layer a nonpolar layer and a brown water layer. The brown layer adjusted by using a buffering system which i did during a brief break where i also used those few minutes to emulsify oils mayo and butter to thinly stain my shirts and seperating fibers from plants i could chew to keep my mouth hydrated.

Then i spent 8 hours cleaning the house using a dry cleaning method i came up with that involves using buffering systems alcohols ph indicators and color uv indicators to remove strong acids and bases and help disinfect

One method i came up with was using repeating polymers of carboxylic acid and weak bases in equilibrium using a gas phase organic solvent to water proof surfaces and create buffers against changes in ph. And using anhydrous calcium carbonate to measure the formation of certain dioxides like sulfur dioxide and thinly staining the rooms in my house with paper towels some near the floor some way up top then loging them by color change in the accumulated oils. Also i made sure nothing was on the floor that could harm my dog by removing all the larger peice of papershreads with a abnormal brightness and removed all the hard water insoluble stuff on my floor that adheared then placed a new protective coating on it to insure no nonpolar organic solvents are slowly building in my room while i practice what i love studying to try to figure out how the trees turn green or why a banana rots. Then i labeled all my different types of oils i could identify in my room and sorted my collected samples by their properties.

I did all this while listening to sasha grely talk about how

 

[d1nach]

How they are banning books and that is bullsh*t. And tessa violet (singer) talk about women writes and how it feels to just be used as a pretty face. And doddie ( singer) about how she struggles with depression and eating disorders and hannah winton ( youtuber) about womens rights and random stuff she likes she bought and views of books she read and her critical analysis of lolita and stuff going on and just because she doesnt have some fancy degree doesnt mean she cant think for herself and how doctors dont know they are just people like you or me

 

[Scrofula]

Are you aware that modafinil and lithium will both interfere with Adderall?

Hopefully the aqueous fraction of your coffee took the water-soluble caffeine. That your lithium doc knows about, who tells you what to drink so you don't fuck up your kidneys too soon.

But I'm glad you support those girls. I don't know any of them, but I'm sure they're good people.

 

[d1nach]

I feel since i spent so many days basically just eye f***ing her and using her voice like a tool when i felt bad. I desided its only fair i watch every one of her opinion videos. But i feel physically sick i cant stop shaking and crying because i feel like i spent thousands of hours focusing on trying to study science of how the world works but i feel painful overwhelming sense of knowing nothing at all.

 

[Scrofula]

" feel like i spent thousands of hours focusing on trying to study science of how the world works but i feel painful overwhelming sense of knowing nothing at all."

Hey, are you sure you aren't a graduate student in his sixth year? (That's how they feel)

Maybe you should try putting her music on instead?

 

[d1nach]

Atleast i dont feel stupid alone.

Nope i dropped out of college first semester because school gave me panic attacks which made me yearly attempt suicide.

I had a full scholarship because of my gpa and its so annoying when you to explain to people you have this thing wrong in your brain and you dont understand why but it makes me want to die when i do this and they say but your so smart people your smarter than me your smarter than most of the kids going in here they dont want to be in here they just suck it up and do it. X has a severe learning ability and he can do it why cant you.


I hate it when people make generalizations like that it makes me like when hannah talks about women and how society buts them all in a box and labels them and tell them how they are instead of actually listening when you ask them whats wrong society just dismisses it as just another overly emotional woman being hysterical over nothing or not really listening and instead when you ask whats wrong you really mean why arent you functioning how i want when i know you cant fix whats wrong all i want you to do is put down your phone for five minutes and listen to me to make me feel like someone sympathizes with how i feel. I dont want to tell you why im crying only to lectured on how well why didnt i do this or that and you wonder why i ignore you when im upset when i know your just to tell me why i ended up on the ground like a annoying baseball fan trying to tell me what i should of done after i get out trying to go to the next base and fall on my face.

 

[d1nach]

I actually took down all the pictures of chemicals around my room and replaced them with the pictures of the people who discovered them, the artists i listen to, do the things i watch on youtube, the pornstars fully closed i watch. I feel so physically sick i cant stop shaking or bursting out into tears because i feel like everything i feel like ive been trying to just get high to feel good and know i feel like i cant predict how ill feel based on how much of a drug i take.

 

[Scrofula]

I've heard stuff like that before but I don't technically have anything wrong going on in my brain. You should answer back, "Well Picasso had a normal brain like yours and I don't see you starting new art movements or selling your shit for millions!"

I used to have a photo of Albert Hoffman in my room in college. I liked his approach to science.

He doesn't wash his hands, gets his research chemicals in his mouth, trips a little. So he eats a lot, and trips hard. What does he do? SHARES. When they (white people) find magic mushrooms who do they call? Albert. He's ready to lend his scientific expertise.

 

[d1nach]

So, after thinking more about the input i got by you people I realized how much I really was using women for sex. i am npt sexually active but id watch porn video after porn video for hours only watching each for like 1 - 2 minutes with no care to are they doing it because they are poor and being exploited or getting payed unfairly so I picked one sasha grey video watched it completely without checking my phone or checking the time or without masterbating. Then now im just watching one of her interviews about what she thinks is important

 

[Scrofula]

Remember, You can't masturbate without U.

These things are important. And I think that sasha chick is pretty rich.