LucieQuinn
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jun 12, 2021
- Messages
- 39
I have severe borderline personality disorder due to past trauma and abuse. I was very isolated and sheltered in a foster home growing up, which makes my relationships with ppl not so healthy. i am also an opiate addict.
I have a hard time making friends and the only friends i have righgt now arent even, in fact. An older man and my gay next door neightbor. They barely text me back sometimes and when i invite them over they sometimes say that i ignore them after a while. I try to be the best friend that i can be, not desperate for company, but ever since my best friend died a month ago, ive been desperate for human interaction, and sortof reaching out to anyone who's there because im so alone and afraid and in grief.
My question is...
does it ever get easier? Being alone all the time? I believe in all my despair that i will be a loner for the rest as i live, try as i might to make friends and seek love.
I'm 31... I should be used to this by now. If it werent for dope, id die of loneliness & grief!
I have a hard time making friends and the only friends i have righgt now arent even, in fact. An older man and my gay next door neightbor. They barely text me back sometimes and when i invite them over they sometimes say that i ignore them after a while. I try to be the best friend that i can be, not desperate for company, but ever since my best friend died a month ago, ive been desperate for human interaction, and sortof reaching out to anyone who's there because im so alone and afraid and in grief.
My question is...
does it ever get easier? Being alone all the time? I believe in all my despair that i will be a loner for the rest as i live, try as i might to make friends and seek love.
I'm 31... I should be used to this by now. If it werent for dope, id die of loneliness & grief!