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Boyfriend doesn't come via vaginal sex....help!

Ok l33t......the solid pumping thing.....is just that....no stopping no changing position no reducing speed or anything....just a jack hammer for 10 to 15 minutes.....I have never ever had this before...the guys ive been with come in a couple of minutes if they do that!
They only last longer if they stop and then restart etc
He gets tired when he does this too ....most of the time he just stops
I do think you guys are right about the porn tho.....cuz he has got me to do stuff off the porn he likes....he asked me to bend over the back of a chair ass in the air so he could look at me and masturbate before sex....that's fine occasionally but not all the time....I'm not a porn star and don't like all this open anus stuff
I think I will stop finishing him off by hand or mouth after sex and see what he says.....then suggest re the abstaining from porn see what happens....surely he would like to be capable of quickies with a woman??? Guys I've been with loved them....so did i
 
Sarah Daisy said:
Ok l33t......the solid pumping thing.....is just that....no stopping no changing position no reducing speed or anything....just a jack hammer for 10 to 15 minutes.....I have never ever had this before...the guys ive been with come in a couple of minutes if they do that!
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Get him to mix up the tempo. Real slow movements are teasing and they give you time to appreciate all the texture and sensations so much more. Personally I find it harder to resist cumming when the pace is real slow as opposed to a faster pace. You can squeeze him using your muscles when its slow too, that's always ace.

He must get as bored as you do only staying in one position surely. Nothing to stop you from taking control, throwing him down and riding him.. or posing in another position, inviting him in. If it continues to be a one way sexual dynamic then you should make the ultimatum really.. it's a two way thing, not a masturbation session.
 
l33t said:
Yeah I guess I need to "harden my skin" like you... You do understand that you have nothing to contribute except to judge me ? low self esteem issues ? Just because I talk like a teenager and I have come to different conclusions than you and I am passionate about life and not a dead boring judgy person ( probably opiate addicted ? you do sound like one ) like you doesnt make me a teenager or inexperienced. Or do you want to tell me that if I was sexually experienced I should also have a hard penis skin ? LOL Do you think that all people grow up and become and talk in a boring way and come to the same conclusions ? You do understand that you coming here just to say that you think I am teenager and inexperienced makes you much much worse than me trying to explain to the OP that I know this hard skin penis dick is mostly BS ??? Or do you want to prove me otherwise ? Or do you assume everyone lives in the USA and cut their skin ? Nobody really does that in Europe.... you also fk the thread and you dont respect OP? Just saying
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spoken like a sexually frustrated teenager with more angst than sexual parters.

and OP, no disrespect but I didn't include any input because most people already stressed what I consider the biggest problem...porn.
 
l33t said:
Bro, what have you done to your head ?????? How on earth did you manage to make that skin hard ?!?! I have been masturbating and having sex almost daily for years straight and I have never never ever noticed ANYTHING like that. Do you actually rub the penis head while you masturbate ?!? I have seen some guys masturbate like that on porn and I always found it weird. Maybe you are one of those guys that only get stimulation from the head and/or not/more by playing the "base" ??? No matter if I masturbate all day long for weeks my penis head skin will still be soft and the most sensitive part of my body ! It never changes sensitivity or thickness. Just by touching it firmly/hard, mine hurts, its that sensitive. It has always been the same.

Sorry man I am not weirded out because you are gay but what have you done to your penis head! It just sounds painful ! You must have ( originally ) a very insensitive penis head to start with or something ? But yo ushould definitely know what you are describing is not a general case, i talk all these stuff with my friends I dont know anyone who gets a rough head skin after masturbating a lot.
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When did I say anything about my own dick?

Maybe you should stop posting while you're high because you're imagining things that haven't happened.
 
I don't want to divert away from BL in any manner, but give the r/nofap subreddit a read through. It sounds like a very similar story to your OP. It might give you some ideas on how to help your man with what sounds like both deathgrip and a porn addiction.
 
Don't know my post has turned into an argument btw two male posters!
From the beginning of this relationship I have shown him EVERYTHING......why can't he be lead sometimes!! I want be fucked properly by a man....I'm sick of doing the fucking!
Most women want a dominant male who knows how to satisfy himself in bed....I know how to satisfy myself...my orgasm is my responsibility not his....and vice versa
Why doesn't he change position himself etc.....its him that doesn't get satisfied during actual penetration not me! I've tried everything before....nothing works so I think he should do what he needs to do

Just can't find a solution to it really
It's like he's in a porn movie....I get him hard...he fucks me for a but....then pulls out and I finish him by mouth or hand. ..in my face etc......exactly like a porn lol!!
I may be boring but I prefer ordinary spontaneous sex! !
 
Sarah Daisy said:
Don't know my post has turned into an argument btw two male posters!
From the beginning of this relationship I have shown him EVERYTHING......why can't he be lead sometimes!! I want be fucked properly by a man....I'm sick of doing the fucking!
Most women want a dominant male who knows how to satisfy himself in bed....I know how to satisfy myself...my orgasm is my responsibility not his....and vice versa
Why doesn't he change position himself etc.....its him that doesn't get satisfied during actual penetration not me! I've tried everything before....nothing works so I think he should do what he needs to do

Just can't find a solution to it really
It's like he's in a porn movie....I get him hard...he fucks me for a but....then pulls out and I finish him by mouth or hand. ..in my face etc......exactly like a porn lol!!
I may be boring but I prefer ordinary spontaneous sex! !

How do I find r/nofap subreddit....new to this site
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Have you told him all of this?

This is not reddit.
 
He watches porn all the time and jerks off all the time and had done for 10 years plus before I met him!!
 
Sarah Daisy said:
He watches porn all the time and jerks off all the time and had done for 10 years plus before I met him!!
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So? It's normal for people, even women and men who are in a relationship and having sex with a partner regularly, to watch porn and masturbate.
 
PriestTheyCalledHim said:
So? It's normal for people, even women and men who are in a relationship and having sex with a partner regularly, to watch porn and masturbate.
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Defining it as normal, and therefore healthy or without possible consequence, because one assumes that the majority of people engage in the practice themselves seems a bit.. weak.
 
PriestTheyCalledHim said:
So? It's normal for people, even women and men who are in a relationship and having sex with a partner regularly, to watch porn and masturbate.
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When I used to watch a lot of porn, my use declined once I entered a relationship. It sounds like this guy is a porn addict and it's negatively affecting his partner.

I mean, if you're jizzing all the time over fantasy women non-stop, then how are you going to get off with your partner?
 
Exactly I'm not against porn.....but he won't watch it with me! Only likes watching it alone! Says he doesn't want me fancying the guys on it!
He has no sex drive for me but has plenty for porn....I stay at his fri to Sunday and we gave sex once
All my other partners we'd have had sex loads more than that
If I try spontaneous sex he puts me off by saying he can't just perform there and then and what if he can't get it up!!
He also sometimes goes semi soft when I'm giving him a BJ or hand job.....and it's not because I don't know how to do it right.....that really puts me off :0(
 
Well it sounds like he has been fucking his fist with a rage of passion for a long time.

If someone masturbates with a strong grip or with toys it can make it difficult to cum for some people. Some people get over it, some don't.

I have never not came because I was nervous. I have been with some women I was not attracted to and found it easier to pull out and cum on their face then to cum in them sometimes.

The other thing is that he might be holding out trying to perform well and by the point you came he has lost his sensitivity. That could be the only way he is not fucked sexually.

I hate to say it but things are the way they are. I really don't think it is good to go in a relationship trying to change someone. Sex is a big deal. I really do not think you can expect people to make changes it an area so personal.

It is alot easier to get someone to do the housework than to get them to change their sexual habits. For example if I wanted anal from a woman who is not into it (and this is just an example) I could try and try and be like "Just the tip to start with" and pester her and all that it is just gonna make her uncomfortable. So this dude can't bust in you. I really doubt you can change that.

It seems like he masturbated for way to long the wrong way. It is ok to jack off but you cant grip it hard to hard core porn all day every day and make fifis and fuck flesh lights and expect a normal sex life if you just wank all the time. It is gonna change the way you orgasm.

Me personally, I avoid masturbation. I try to have sex instead. If I need to get off I do. I try to use a looser grip than I used to. A tight grip makes it more difficult to cum. I am not saying masturbation is bad, but in the OP's case that guy obviously wanked too much and too wrong.

So yeah I would go ahead and say your relationship is fucked unless you are cool with the way things are.
 
Sarah Daisy said:
Exactly I'm not against porn.....but he won't watch it with me! Only likes watching it alone! Says he doesn't want me fancying the guys on it!
He has no sex drive for me but has plenty for porn....I stay at his fri to Sunday and we gave sex once
All my other partners we'd have had sex loads more than that
If I try spontaneous sex he puts me off by saying he can't just perform there and then and what if he can't get it up!!
He also sometimes goes semi soft when I'm giving him a BJ or hand job.....and it's not because I don't know how to do it right.....that really puts me off :0(
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Have you tried talking to him about any of this, or saying how you want sex the way you posted about before?
 
Yes a whole ago now I did.....but he gets very defensive and responds with "its the way I am and im not changing ....all men watch porn...." or well if your not happy with what i do then let's call it a day
But he gets pissed off if I watch porn or even if I think a guy is nice on tv!!
He accuses me of cheating a lot and is always accusing me of looking at other guys in the street!! I've never cheated and im just walking down the street like everyone else!!
It's ok for him to look at women tho....he does it all the time....I dont say anything tho....its natural up to a point but not nice in front of me!
He's really jealous and trys to control me
He hates my ex husband and always says if he finds out I've spoken to him or been in his house with him he will beat him up!! My youngest child lives with my ex so I have to only see him when ex is out....its really hard
He's a very angry aggressive man....he tells me if he catches me cheating he will kill me and the guy....literally! !
He threatened to snap my neck once because I had a small tattoo done and didn't tell him till afterwards!
He is always ill with something or other every day too and very moody
He is very hard work
 
Sarah Daisy said:
Yes a whole ago now I did.....but he gets very defensive and responds with "its the way I am and im not changing ....all men watch porn...." or well if your not happy with what i do then let's call it a day
But he gets pissed off if I watch porn or even if I think a guy is nice on tv!!
He accuses me of cheating a lot and is always accusing me of looking at other guys in the street!! I've never cheated and im just walking down the street like everyone else!!
It's ok for him to look at women tho....he does it all the time....I dont say anything tho....its natural up to a point but not nice in front of me!
He's really jealous and trys to control me
He hates my ex husband and always says if he finds out I've spoken to him or been in his house with him he will beat him up!! My youngest child lives with my ex so I have to only see him when ex is out....its really hard
He's a very angry aggressive man....he tells me if he catches me cheating he will kill me and the guy....literally! !
He threatened to snap my neck once because I had a small tattoo done and didn't tell him till afterwards!
He is always ill with something or other every day too and very moody
He is very hard work
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Yikes! 8o

He sounds mean and like someone you should not be in a relationship with. Stay safe, and get out while you can. Do other people who are close to you like family or friends know he's abusive and controlling like this?
 
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