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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Distancing Talk Thread: Swirly Congregation That's 100% Pandemic-Proof

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Wife just wants me to get another job and not muck about the place on all sorts of chemicals...took 3mg Risperdone like 7 hours ago and slept still kinda tripping but I smoked Cannabis which helped. But I'm gonna take Risperdal a few days to keep me from getting stuck in the super loop. Ended up eating 5mgs DOC and 40mgs 2C-C more...smoked DMT 5 or 6 times in midst the binge. Was one of the hardest multiday affairs i ever went on. Just all that DOPr 10mgs, 50mgs 4-AcO-DMT with the 80mgs 2C-D had me awake close to two days and the dosing of squirts of DOC.in my tea it just turned the visuals and colors outta the planet. It was utter madness for a good portion I'd say.

°○•°●•°○ did have random nosebleed for 5 minutes inwhich my Wife proclaimed that your probably dying.... °•○●°•○•°

But over all I came out the better for it in the end. Stay Swirly PD Fam <3

Gotta take a break for awhile from tripping a month. My tolerance is ridiculous right now and I need my feet planted more firmly in this plane so to say. So I will just focus on the job hunt but of course come here to talk all of this jazz, because that's half the fun :D

 
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My iboga TA extract is in customs. Makes me nervous considering my relatively recent seizure. However it's going to a friend's house in his name so no reason it should be stopped. It's only been there for 2 business days. But I can't help but feel a little nervous! Looking forward to seeing that it got released.

I'm doing well anyway though. Haven't had any opiates in a few days. I've been working out, and paying attention to nutrition, haven't had any alcohol in a week, and I quit smoking cigarettes. I did get a vape for band-related situations because those are the times everyone is smoking and I really have a hard time not doing it. It's been going quite well. I still am looking forward to meeting back up with iboga, though.
 
Sooo Charlie, how was the DOPr??
10mg is a huuuge dose but I was actually planning on almost taking the heroic route with that one too but I need to be excellently prepared.

These customs of today Xork, they got my anti hangover pills as well!! The suffering that could’ve been avoided..... I would’ve been a hero among students and friends, admired, longed for, but alas :(
 
Well it was one of the most visually powerful experiences of my entire life. It was straight swirly soup of Euphoric bliss in my brain was in a state of overwhelming enjoyment. Felt ad if I'd burst for moments and kept redosing with more Phens and a little Tryptamines. It was a powerful enough trip to where I will listen to my wife and lay down my towel tripping for awhile. Maybe I will jump back in a month I'm going for, gonna take Risperdal the next 2 two weeks and become completely grounded once again.
 
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Smoking DMT while you are peaking on both those DOx and 2C-x and 4-AcO-DMT and allowed my a chance to break thru reality. Im going to have to write a 2 day story of when I found myself in a house made of mirrors and rainbows. And as they shattered did I into a those fragments branching out as conscious entities in themselves it was pretty heavily psychedelic stuff....
 
Have to promise her not to take benzos at all and I'm telling my friends that they are not ever allowed to give them to me again. Despite whatever bullspit I come up with to make it sound okay. They fuck me up so bad every few months until recently its every week. But yeah she wants me to publicly say I'm not ever allowed to take benzos and my friends are not allowed to help me with that ever again. Literally every class I can manage besides that and Dissos.
 
You and benzos are clearly bad news, I think this is a good idea. Honestly if you really want my friend opinion for a good friend I care about... I think you should stick to bupe, and psychedelics, and that's it. I think dissociatives are bad news too, and adding various opioid RCs on top of bupe gets you all fucked up and you've said she doesn't like that. Also stimulants, because of your heart (plus they're not good drugs to be doing - like I can talk, I did adderall last night, but I'm doing my best to minimize them in my life. But I still have insight about it. If you stick to your prescribed bupe and the occasional psychedelic, my strong feeling is that not only will your wife be happy and know that you're making an effort and start rebuilding her trust for you, but also as we all know, drug addiction might temporarily make you feel better but it makes everything in your life worse, and harder to deal with.

I really, really do not want to see you lose everything, man. And to be honest I think you're on the precipice. If she catches you one more time it may very well the actual last time. I know how much she means to you. Real talk, I fear for your safety if she leaves you. I worry about you every day because of this. Hiding things from your SO is impossible to maintain, it WILL catch up to you, trust me I know from experience. I hid my lifestyle from her for like 7 years of us living together, but it came crashing down eventually, and it is inevitable that it will. Especially now that she is on such high alert. Besides that, it is a betrayal every time. My ex was awful to me, but I truly did traumatize her by continually using drugs behind her back, and she had every right to be hurt and stop being able to trust me. And lack of trust is a relationship poisoner. That was wrong of me, probably the most in the wrong I've ever been and the worst I've ever treated anyone.

I love you man, I really want to see you succeed. I mean you're my friend so of course I do, plus even if you weren't, I want the best for everyone. But aside from that, you have SO MUCH to offer the world, the world needs more people like you, who exude love and support for others. If we lose you, the world loses a bright, shining beacon of light who lifts others up. There is so much at stake here. I know you feel stable on bupe and you've told me repeatedly that you feel the best and most stable on bupe and bupe only. As I see it, you are at a crossroads, and your life from here could go in two dramatically different directions, and IMO it's largely dependent on your willingness to cut out the destructive drug patterns and stick to your medicine. Your girl is lucky to have some a loving partner, you are wonderful, and you are worthy of her, and she is worthy of you from what I have seen. But there is only so much someone can take, and be expected to take, when it comes to repeated betrayals. One important thing I learned from my ex-marriage is that for someone who is not a drug addict, watching a loved one in the grips of addiction is horrifying, confusing, hurtful, traumatizing and impossible to really understand. My ex never despised me before the years of repeatedly being caught and then continuing to lie and sneak around and mislead her into what I wanted her to see. She was still awful to me because of her own problems despite that, but once it got deep into my addiction and we had multiple rounds of catching, promises, and breaking those promises, she grew to absolutely despise me. And I really can't blame her for that, what I was doing was fucked up. In my case I am lucky it ended, but even after it ended, I stopped doing all the self-destructive stuff I was doing, for myself. And my life became SO MUCH better.

Love you brother, I hope this reaches you in a positive way, know that all I have for you is love and I'm trying to be a good friend to you right now. ❤ You're very often on my mind lately and I just felt I needed to say this to you.
 
Xorkoth said:
for someone who is not a drug addict, watching a loved one in the grips of addiction is horrifying, confusing, hurtful, traumatizing and impossible to really understand.
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Yeah. We all ultimately live for ourselves, but ruining your life also ruin the lives of your close ones.
 
Yeah I'm fucking done with benzos I will never get another RC one or fill a script and for real dont wanna be a liar it sucks and it's not even a good drug I have more fun stuff that's trippy and not gonna kill me off like this 4-HO-MET/4-AcO-DMT mix I have to play with in the coming months. Gonna wait 3 or 4 weeks to trip and then the trials with 5-Methyl-MDA at somepoint. But I actually got some amazing news relating to a trial working day at this restaurant. It's for a pretty heavy duty spot. Just hoping I get good vibes and I'm not gonna do any weird drugs at my job. If I so trip it will be on a day off all that twice a week stufd is over my receptors are so worn out.

Thankful for Weed working for me again just cant over use it but its enough with the Bupe to keep me stable. Had two Beers tonight and it was fun I havent drank much the past 5 months like probably less than 10 times. Gonna try and make positive changes. Can still have fun I just gotta leave this fucking benzos alone I feel like the biggest broken record its embarrassing honestly. I'm just gonna have to walk away and not be a sneaky fuck and get benzos behind her back I felt so horrible inside having to keep that relapse secret. Have to put that stuff behind me it's such a terrible problem to have cuz I always blackout for a couple days and my Wife gets really upset and I cant do it to her anymore she is being so amazing right now for putting up with me so I have to start being totally honest all the time why.

Keeping secrets from someone you love is a horrible feeling I'm just gonna have to block off my access to them from all channels. And I'm super motivated again I feel like the luck has started being rechanneled. Tommorow my friend is cokinf over I havent gotten to see in months I'm gonna give him some 2C-Something and be a sober sitter for the first time like ever I think. I'm gonna be smoking weed but that is it for me if I even do that.
 
@Cosmic Charlie I second everything Xorkoth wrote as I can tell he absolutely said everything he did directly from the heart. That was probably one of the most sincere and honest things I have ever seen written from one friend to another on BL and it fills me with pride to know that we care so deeply about one another here.

I have just begun to get to know you but I can honestly say that I think you are the coolest damn person on this site. I barely know you but for our recent communications but I fucking love you dude because you are all those things Xorkoth said and so much more. You're just a real ass dude and I can tell that you have a personality and soul very close to mine. That's why I truly care about you. It would rip me up inside to see the true heart of the Psych forum and somebody, who radiates so much love and positivity suffer and spin out into the darkness.

I'm trying so hard to step back from my destructive habits because God knows I've let drugs fuck up so much in my life. I'm on the same tip as you. I can only occasionally trip on days off, very minimal pot usage and absolutely no opiates, stimulants or binge drinking. Tbh... Dissociatives scare the shit out of me and I'm content to stick to tryptamines and phenylthylamines. If we both Keep our heads on relatively straight then we'll be able to reap life's rewards and more fully enjoy those cosmic moments. Everybodies gotta recognize the substance classes that they themselves just can't partake in... Love ya brother and even though Ive been trying to get my own shit under control I'm right here with ya.

Now if only the universe would bless me with some lysergamides. I guess it's time to finally wade out into the clearnet RC purchasing pool to take a chance on a 1cp-LSD vendor because my hook went MIA. I'm so naive to the process I have no idea where to start. I truly believe my recovery and ability to abstain from my harmful substance list hinges on ready access to a trip vacay when the need arises.

Glad to have found this side of BL.... As Cosmic Charlie would say everyone stay swirly... but within reason... Gotta know your poisons...lol
 
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It's true, they're almost all worthwhile substances. The classics are amazing too, but there are a number of RC psychedelics that are every bit as good, and unique too.
 
Psychedelics, it's a lifestyle. Get used to it. What are we gonna eat today? What are we gonna trip on this week? I can't wait to have a picnic in the park with my girlfriend in the summer with the birds whistling and some watermelon slices while my meditative state detoriates into some psychedelic cuddling. Aaaaah : D
 
Yes indeed, what are we gonna trip on...... so many ambiances to shoot for, I'm drowning in untried psychedelics but there are others I dearly miss.

I wonder what psychedelic you had primarily in mind when writing your post, I'm guessing a lysergamide but I could be way off.
 
I love your new avatar, Charlie. I keep thinking I'm seeing Spacejunk though, as his avatar looks really similar.
 
Xorkoth said:
The classics are amazing too, but there are a number of RC psychedelics that are every bit as good, and unique too.
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Do you all really think so? Interesting! Like which ones?

I love exploring novel psychedelics, but I can't think of many that I think hold up well to the classics, and I very much expected to when I started investigating.

Really, 2C-T-2 and methallylescaline are the ones I usually think of, and they're not that substantively different from mescaline.

DPT for sure, but I don't like it at all. 2C-E for some people for sure, but not me. 5-MeO-DMT for many, but it isn't really an RC. Maybe 4-AcO-MPT will be up there, but I only have one experience to go off of. There are tons that are delightful (5-MeO-MiPT) and unique and interesting in their own way (DiPT,) but very few for me have the whole package.

How about you all?
 
Some have certain qualities that you could not find in the original ones, shrooms, acid and mescaline may be somewhat the parent psychedelics if i have to use a metaphor. Things like DPT, DMT, TMA, DOC, etc are quite different. Yet I do feel myself more attracted to all the alternative states of the other creations based on those three. Well, that and other stuff. Can't ignore some disso use even if it is messing up my memory. Sometimes I prefer an easier substance like a 2C-x.
 
DOC is an absolute gem, for me it offers something really unique, it's sort of LSD-like and sort of mescaline-like, but different and every bit as worthwhile. DOPr also, and I'm quite sure DOB as well by the recent reports from some on here. 2C-E is, for me, breathtakingly psychedelic and has produced the most profoundly psychedelic trip of my life. I prefer AMT to MDMA in terms of empathogens. DiPT is just completely unlike anything else. 4-HO-MiPT is every bit as good as mushrooms, though less deep, and more euphoric. 2C-C and 2C-B have great place in my pharmacopoeia as recreational fun drugs. I imagine DPT will also be top tier for me. 2C-T-2 is very therapeutic and fantastic for exploring your psyche for use in intentional therapy.

I guess for me, I like variety and there are many that I prefer over the classics, for particular situations. LSD is amazing and absolutely top-tier, but it could be an "RC" and something else a "classic" if things hadn't gone down the way they did with Hofmann randomly discovering it and then it becoming popularized. Other than the fact that it is an amazingly well-rounded and wonderful substance, I don't consider it special in the way that some do where there is sort of a sense that nothing could ever possibly beat it, so why bother trying (not saying you think this Pfafffed, but it's an idea I have often had communicated to me by people who look down on RCs).
 
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