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yuba just go!! you don't even know them!! they might be sound. and there'll be max 3 of them anyhow.

when i moved to the cottages after being in meadows there was only 1 guy there for the first 2 weeks and cos they had separate girls and boys houses i had the place i was staying to myself. tbh i was glad for more company when another girl came. then the guy left so it was just 2 of us again.

i recommended him the rehab i went to cos i reckon you can't get better care within the UK.
 
yubacity said:
Rio bro how you doing please answer
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Dude he hasn't logged in to Bluelight in over a month. I'm sure he'll reply as soon as he sees the posts in this thread :) Have you got a way of contacting him off this site??
 
n3ophy7e said:
Dude he hasn't logged in to Bluelight in over a month. I'm sure he'll reply as soon as he sees the posts in this thread :) Have you got a way of contacting him off this site??
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No i have not got shit he helped me so much during my first try at a clean life I just drop a message in the hope he replies
 
Hey guys.

Sorry @yubacity brother. How have you been? Are you in rehab?

I have 9 days clean today. I am really going to make sure I don't disappear again. Life has been a bit crazy recently and my last relapse really made my life implode. Just trying to put the pieces together again.

Now I am out of the immediate daily using cycle I am back in a familiar heads pace. I am back on 2mg subutex which I am gonna stay on for at least a couple months.

@chinup I have come round totally on the rehab idea. I have been contacting places and am waiting for a miracle to get me in.
 
Welcome back. I know there are many people on here that have been worried about you and will be glad to see you are checking in. Sounds like you had a tough go of it the last few months.

All you can do is keep trying to get where you really want to be and then fight like hell to stay there. Lord knows that it is a lifelong battle but the ones that stick with it and get through to the other side never regret doing so. Some people say that they can't live without drugs because they have done them for many years and think they can't cope without them. I don't believe that. Of course we can live without drugs and we can have a good life but we have to believe we can before we can make any progress.

Good to see you back. Keep on trying and one of these days it's gonna stick. Might not be next week or next month but if you keep trying one of these attempts will be successful.
 
rrrriiiiiioooooooo!!!! glad to have you back. and that you're set on rehab. keep contacting them. bug them every day. do everything you can. this is to save your life.

yuba- you get in rehab too. like literally in the manor there will be max 3 other people, its a huge property so you can just never interact with them if you want. and you only have 1 on 1 therapy.
 
Rio Fantastic said:
Hey guys.

Sorry @yubacity brother. How have you been? Are you in rehab?

I have 9 days clean today. I am really going to make sure I don't disappear again. Life has been a bit crazy recently and my last relapse really made my life implode. Just trying to put the pieces together again.

Now I am out of the immediate daily using cycle I am back in a familiar heads pace. I am back on 2mg subutex which I am gonna stay on for at least a couple months.

@chinup I have come round totally on the rehab idea. I have been contacting places and am waiting for a miracle to get me in.
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How you doing bruv so good to hear from you how you been. Congrats on the 9 days was getting worried about you. Had a bad day yesterday me and a few pals were out for the fury wilder fight we were on the coke got hotel rooms i started shaking on one side my hand was so bad I thought I had a stroke my pal called an ambulance. They wanted me to go in get blood tests but I worried I lose my HGV license don't need it in the UK I got the American version but my lorry license is dear to my heart it is what I spent on my heroin addiction while the business was for family. The ambulance ruled out a stroke or heart attack but bl;blood pressure and heart rate was high that because of coke once i smoked heroin with the escort i was better the paramedics think it was because of stress I'm so worried that I addicted to the gear crack pregabalin and phenibut that how the fuck can i get clean im trapped bruv . Seeing you are doing great made me so happy i never will forget your help and my offer is always there my brother
 
chinup said:
rrrriiiiiioooooooo!!!! glad to have you back. and that you're set on rehab. keep contacting them. bug them every day. do everything you can. this is to save your life.

yuba- you get in rehab too. like literally in the manor there will be max 3 other people, its a huge property so you can just never interact with them if you want. and you only have 1 on 1 therapy.
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Thank chin up I so trapped I will have the medicated detox I can't see a way I can get off all the different stuff will find out tomorrow if they provide it and one to one therapy is the only way I can do it no way I will ever open mouth in a group . My eyesight in the last few days has gone so weak don't know why. How are you, my friend is the purging under control
 
they can do medical detox cos the vast majority of their clients are alcoholics.

i didn't purge yesterday, haven't today but just about to have lasagne. i will try and keep it down cos i've been on my feet decorating my new office all day.
 
chinup said:
they can do medical detox cos the vast majority of their clients are alcoholics.

i didn't purge yesterday, haven't today but just about to have lasagne. i will try and keep it down cos i've been on my feet decorating my new office all day.
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Eat little bits mate the fuller you get the more urge you will feel to bring it up
 
@yubacity - sorry to hear you're struggling mate. Do you have a detox planned? Are you using every day?

@chunup How have you been? Still sober?

I am 18 days clean just on 2mg of subs. I am really disappointed with myself today. Was meant to go for an interview at a B&M but I was so depressed and concerned because at another local B&M store I would shoplift there A LOT when I was using, and I am worried about getting recognised.

It's not a disaster as I have other interviews lined up and I wasn't crazy about this one, its more just the fact that I let my head get the better of me and didn't go and do what I planned to do and I am really beating myself up about it. I need a job ASAP since I only have one more paycheque coming from the cinema and after that its just paltry Universal Credit that wont even cover my rent.

However, I realise if it wasnt for my clean time I wouldn't have interviews at all. I wouldn't even be looking, and things are getting better. I am bouncing back - just painfully slowly.
 
Rio Fantastic said:
@yubacity - sorry to hear you're struggling mate. Do you have a detox planned? Are you using every day?

@chunup How have you been? Still sober?

I am 18 days clean just on 2mg of subs. I am really disappointed with myself today. Was meant to go for an interview at a B&M but I was so depressed and concerned because at another local B&M store I would shoplift there A LOT when I was using, and I am worried about getting recognised.

It's not a disaster as I have other interviews lined up and I wasn't crazy about this one, its more just the fact that I let my head get the better of me and didn't go and do what I planned to do and I am really beating myself up about it. I need a job ASAP since I only have one more paycheque coming from the cinema and after that its just paltry Universal Credit that wont even cover my rent.

However, I realise if it wasnt for my clean time I wouldn't have interviews at all. I wouldn't even be looking, and things are getting better. I am bouncing back - just painfully slowly.
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My brother if you struggle let me know what your rent you have been there for me let me help you . This fucking tory goverment kicking the poor in the nuts i was at traffic lights today and a line of people at the chemist mobility scooter the old . I could not resist and opened the window and said this what the working class get for voting for the cunts Brexit Brexit we don't give a fuck now wallow in your misery. I'm just so fucking angry I went to the Pakistani butchers yesterday to get lamb chops and a man walked in and asked for citric acid and they kept asking what you want it for and i exploded and said why the fuck you want to know . Fucking pricks they old friends of my dad we used to get meat from them since I was a kid i apologized today said sorry uncle.

I'm just angry at my own hell my wife misses my kids but she doesn't want to leave me here. I'm of the gear for 17 hours so far then of to the rehab to get off the pregabs and fuck off out this country.

My brother don't let pride get in the way of help you need I was clean for over a year because of you ash and chin up let me help you
 
urgh can totally get not wanting to apply for a job somewhere you used to shoplift, even if its not the same shop, you don't know what info they share between shops in the local area.

what other interviews do you have? just try and come across like you actively want the job and know what it is, scrub up well, etc. i really hope you get something. must be super scary. definitely good you're clean now or it could be horrendous- you'd easily end up homeless.

@yubacity you finally going to rehab?!? i really hope so, and that it helps.

why on earth were they asking for citric in a butchers?

i'm not sober- i did quite well in august and early september. then shit. and i've been purging. but its caught up with me now and my stomach has had me bedridden most of the past 3 days. moving house soon. just need to get the final bits sorted and work out when to move the cats.
 
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