☮ Social ☮ PD Social Distancing Tripping Thread: Viruses Can't Penetrate Hyperspace

[Delsyd]

It's been years since I've done any, its just tucked away in the stash, but if memory serves me right it was around 40mg for the effects i described above. I'd have to go back and read my posts from the 2c-d thread to remember. I also used it a lot for nootropic type effects back in the day but I can't honestly say if it helped or not, tho I did enjoy the slight buzz it provided. Also the combo of amphetamine and 2c-d, which SKL and F&B are fans of, is lots of fun and resembles a roll or MDA or something similar.
Good drug, makes me want to dig out it up.

 

[Img_9999]

2C-D never really did it for me. I bought a small amount, tried it once at 20 mg which was barely felt, then twice at 25 mg with some amphetamine thrown in which was fun for a rave and a black metal show, but not really psychedelic at all.
Last time I tried 30 mg snorted, and it just fucking destroyed my nose, gave me a pretty anxious come-up, then a four hour trip in which I was in sharp nasal pain for the first hour and a half and later plateaued with some minor breathing visuals, color enhancement and just some CNS stimulation.

You already are making music, in a roundabout way. The paper is your instrument, the words are your score.

Haha, that's a good way to look at it. Gives a little extra bit of motivation. I'll try to channel that musical energy into this one thing. Learning to have a centered mind has been one of the hardest parts of my adult life, lol.

 

[swilow]

Little bit of 3-MeO-PCP today. 150mg of pregabalin. I might have a bit of 2C-D later on, might now though.

Seriously though, why do I ask myslef "what drugs today?" as soon as I awake?

This music in my ears, more Max Richter- I like the mysterious feeling in this piece off The Blue Notebooks (which is a well known album by Richter). It reminds me a bit of Burzum's ambient works ridiculously enough.

 

[TheAppleCore]

Seriously though, why do I ask myslef "what drugs today?" as soon as I awake?

LOL, I know that problem all too well.

Sometimes nothing is ever quite good enough. If I'm sober, I'm not high enough. If I'm high, I'm too high and I need to sober up. If I'm alone, I need more friends. If I've got company, people suck and I want solitude. 8(

I think I'm getting better at the whole "be here now" thing though.

 

[swilow]

I relate in totality to what you just said.

Sometimes just being a thing in a body is uncomfortable to me.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

^I'm sad because my thoughts are usually 'what downer am I gonna take today?'

Happy fact, one of my friends told me he'd tried GHB tonight. I didn't even know he knew what GHB is. I have always wanted to try it. This perhaps might be a new step in a connection related direction.

 

[swilow]

GHB is great. I've decreased my use recently and am getting a lot more from it. Once or twice a week, 1-2 grams. Its a nice drug, I love how horny I get :D

I also get talkative and motivated. And then sleepy. And sometimes wake a few hours later with incredibly energy. Codeine goes down really well at this stage.

 

[Xorkoth]

I feel like GHB and phenibut probably have a lot of similarities, having never tried GHB. Phenibut makes me super horny, very talkative, it provides this easy, jovial euphoria. Then sleepy much later on. But it's over a much longer timescale I think. Probably less intense as well, and it takes hours to come on. The energy after GHB comes from dopamine rebound, it's the reason it was originally touted as a bodybuilding supplement, you were supposed to take it to sleep and then you'd wake up with a ton of dopamine/energy. I have theorized before that perhaps phenibut's energy and euphoria comes from a similar mechanism. Some people seem to report pretty fast sedating effects, and a short duration. Personally I get very little until 3 or 4 hours in, when suddenly I am filled with the compulsion to talk and do stuff. The weird thing is, during the height of this, I can paradoxically become very sedated, but only if I lay down and close my eyes. If I get sedated because of this, it's really hard to stay awake. But I will still feel the energizing and euphoric effects when I wake up in the morning. And if I stay active, it never makes me sleepy unless I have too much, then I can't stay awake for anything. So who knows.

I tend to also think "what am I going to take today", not necessarily downers although I realize that between phenibut, alcohol and benzos (the latter being an occasional thing but sometimes to fill a void), I actually do take downers most days. But I just like to be high a lot. It's not even to cover anything up, it's just ever since I started getting high I've been fascinated by it. Definitely the core of my addictive personality, I was the same way with whatever I was into at all stages in my life. I'm like that with music now too although that's the most productive obsession I've had and I don't and never will consider it a problem. But I really need to cut back on my consumption of substances or I'm going to end up pretty unhealthy later in life. I also need to start exercising again... I got majorly out of the habit for various reasons, originally from a series of minor injuries/pains. Now I'm out of the habit and it's hard to get back in it. I am feeling much less in shape, and weaker, I don't like it. I think once it gets warm, I'm going to start trail running in the mornings or at lunch. Cardio is more important than weights and I'm not in shape with it anymore... the cigarettes have made that worse too.

 

[Img_9999]

These last weeks my most frequent high is sleep deprivation

 

[Delsyd]

Best part about sleep deprivation is catching up on sleep.
I love sleeping.

 

[Xorkoth]

Sleep is good. I like that it's a reset button sort of. Plus it's really comfy, and dreams are cool. A lot of the time I wish we didn't have to sleep, or that sleeping wasn't a thing, because I usually wish there were more hours in my day. But some days I am really glad for sleep.

 

[swilow]

I'm not a huge fan of sleeping. I get about 6 hours most nights. I love getting up early, usually 6am regardless of my bedtime.

I'm gonna be smoking some DMT today with a friend who's never tried it. Should be something

 

[Solipsis]

Ha safe journeys dudes!

I feel so blessed to have lysergamides and other psychedelics in my life, and I can't wait to trip again

Was reading a couple pages from the book "the human biocomputer" by John Lilly which this artist donated to me from his collection.. and it is - at least those parts - about using LSD to reprogram your mind. So now I'm really interested to just lie down during my next trip and go deep into my mind's vault. I have been pretty anxious to go outside during trips the last few times... if there is excellent weather like most of this week so far I may still strongly consider getting over that.

 

[TheAppleCore]

I feel so blessed to have lysergamides and other psychedelics in my life, and I can't wait to trip again

Hear, hear.

I've been denying the %#!* out of myself with respect to psychedelics lately. I was more or less challenging myself to experience ego loss strictly via meditation, with no drug influence. I might give up soon though. Hell, it might take me 40 years, and I don't want to wait that long to have another trip.

Was reading a couple pages from the book "the human biocomputer" by John Lilly which this artist donated to me from his collection.. and it is - at least those parts - about using LSD to reprogram your mind. So now I'm really interested to just lie down during my next trip and go deep into my mind's vault. I have been pretty anxious to go outside during trips the last few times... if there is excellent weather like most of this week so far I may still strongly consider getting over that.

Oh, man. You have to go outside while tripping. I'm usually a total agoraphobic homebody when I'm sober, but I absolutely can't get enough of the outdoors while tripping. It's pure magic.

 

[Xorkoth]

You don't have to give up trying to achieve ego loss through meditation, you can just do it here and there with psychedelics too. Unless the reason for abstaining goes beyond then. In that case, not trying to be enabler. 8)

 

[TheAppleCore]

You don't have to give up trying to achieve ego loss through meditation, you can just do it here and there with psychedelics too. Unless the reason for abstaining goes beyond then. In that case, not trying to be enabler. 8)

Haha. Yes, that's pretty much strictly the reason I'm abstaining. Psychedelics tend to make it easier for me to "go with the flow" even long after I'm done tripping, so it felt like cheating to take anything during this challenge. But, I think I've gone long enough. Time for a good ride on ALD-52, sometime within the next week or so.

 

[swilow]

Ego loss through meditation would possibly freak me out a bit. What if it doesn't wear off?? At least a psychedelic has a half life Not convinced egolessness is especially desirable or useful. We are human, we have a 'thing' we label ego, it is inherent to the human condition. Some human religions seem to think ego is bad, almost sinful. I don't buy it, it's part of being human. So much of religion seems to make our nature and attributes negative but I don't want to go around thinking there's a bad part of me that needs taming or killing. It seems like self hatred. Self hatred possibly broadens in scope.

That is if the ego is even real. I've yet to read consistent or coherent descriptions of what it even is. What if its you? Or nothing? What if enlightenment is a delusion? Perhaps strengthening the ego is better, strengthening it so its powerful enough to not be an asshole? That seems better than opting out into self absorption.

That said, I experienced considerable ego loss today on DMT :D We had three smokes over a few hours, shared about 300mg all up. First one was wild for both, very humorous as twas my mate's first go. He was amazed and humbled and euphoric, me too. Next was mild for me, but strong for him, he was fixated on objects and highly amused by his walls.

The third smoke, the most material used (we were sharing a pipe, he wanted to trip together- highly recommended method, on tobacco and passed back and forth, communal and comforting) was utterly insane for both, but especially for me. I was utterly gone into a fractal universe of insects and alien shapes (very Giger), very strong vivid sense of prescence and forceful communication. Was told to tell everyone but not what I should be telling them

It was beautiful and terrifying, my name changed or morphed, the Me was abstract and confusing, I laughed and even sort of tearlessly cried, and wondered if I'd wet my pants (I hadn't!)

Rejuvenating. I focused a bit on my drug use, felt freed from some burdens.

My best mate really enjoyed it, too. He's older than me and an intriguing dude. He's large and intense, very alpha in a good way, always concerned about others. He was very protector like today, ensuring all was well, extending a comforting hand... I'm so pleased I came with him on his first sojourn into Insect World.

With my semi-rant about ego above, I just don't think there's a magic bullet or mental trick which will liberate you. Its all choices. So many choices.

Be well, my smiley, swirling companions in this momentous, spiralling, ever-changing elephant ride to eternity

 

[Xorkoth]

^Sounds great.

I'm going to visit my family for my dad's 60th birthday, flying out today. My brother is picking me up from the airport and I'm gonna hang out with him and his wife tonight. I asked him, hey bro, are we gonna drunk tonight for St Patty's day?

His reply: "well we're not gonna get sober tonight, I can tell you that much."

 

[Solipsis]

Why do you want to achieve ego loss by the way? It seems a bit overrated in certain ways. Not to be blasé about how intense and extraordinary it can be, but I'm talking about it being some sort of goal...

I used to be quite interested in it, to be honest... and me and my best tripping buddy have been to retreats and practiced zen buddhism / meditation including with a group. We tripped and meditated a lot, and we could in some sense cease to exist or be present although I guess not so totally as can happen during a trip - I am not claiming to have been a pro at this.... but my point is: much later I started wondering why it would be so worthwhile to spend that focus and attention in order to "tune out" so much. It made sense in an almost escapist way but not anymore now.

If you ask me you are much better off with practising more mindful meditation and staying present, not treating your ego like some sort of enemy. I mean it needs to shut up now and then but just integrating it and keeping it balanced seems perfectly fine and wonderful to me.

GHB is nice :D i probably abuse it a bit too much which is why I would never get a significant amount anymore, but in december I had a little bit and enjoyed it.

Oh i haven't read swilows post yet, will do that now - might be relevant to the above..

I think the ego embodies a lot of our drives, some of which we seem to think we have transcended or ought to? At least I have thought about it like that for quite a while although I have not paid attention to these kinds of topics much these recent years. It won't go offline permanently, I think a fear of that is one of the many defense mechanisms that are basically the control-freakiness of the ego right down to the existential level. The last defenses I always found the hardest, feeling like I was leaving the earth and only connected with a tether... then I started worrying about what might happen to my body if I "left", the pure unknowns associated with a total surrender.
The hardest I have ever gone ego-less was that fateful second time I ever tripped, on mushrooms, and part of it was so bad and dizzying that I actually accepted my fate not knowing if I would end up insane or dead. That kind of surrender is ultimate. It really changed me, but I don't see the need to go there that hard again, though I have since had mystical episodes like that including a rebirth experience which did not last for many hours like that superheavy time.

I used to want to 'unlock my full potential' with that kind of approach, but I don't feel right anymore doing that to myself... Whereas I have plenty to actualize, I feel like I have realized enough for some time... the exploring I still do can still involve bettering myself and listening to what feels right / what I need in my life rather than the bad habits pursuing what I want.

Perhaps wanting to go there reflects that you have things you feel you need to let go of? (tac)

 

[Kaleida]

I've been denying the %#!* out of myself with respect to psychedelics lately. I was more or less challenging myself to experience ego loss strictly via meditation, with no drug influence. I might give up soon though. Hell, it might take me 40 years, and I don't want to wait that long to have another trip.

That seems like more trouble than it's worth, haha. Does it have to be entirely drug-free? I've experienced complete ego death once through the combination of meditation and cannabis, and it's easy for me to get there partially now. I almost feel like it can't go all the way again though, not readily anyway, like the first time was only so intense because it was unexpected and just happened to cross some threshold that way. It was completely for real that one time though, on either side of it briefly I even had very strong tryptamine-like visuals, both geometry and visions. I can also get those quite a bit more easily now while doing this too, but they're far less vivid or complex generally.

Ego loss through meditation would possibly freak me out a bit. What if it doesn't wear off?? At least a psychedelic has a half life Not convinced egolessness is especially desirable or useful. We are human, we have a 'thing' we label ego, it is inherent to the human condition. Some human religions seem to think ego is bad, almost sinful. I don't buy it, it's part of being human. So much of religion seems to make our nature and attributes negative but I don't want to go around thinking there's a bad part of me that needs taming or killing. It seems like self hatred. Self hatred possibly broadens in scope.

That would be some pretty hardcore mediation. X) Personally, I tend to think that neurochemical cascades triggered by situational events are less likely to last a long time than ones forced out by drugs. For what it's worth, my cannabis + meditation complete ego loss experience lasted all of like a minute at most, I pretty much tranced myself into an obliterating rush and then just floated right back down again.

Egolessness isn't useful. Seeking ego death just for that part where "you" don't exist is barely different than using heroin to shut out the world, pretty much only being elevated in my mind because it's at least incredibly interesting. If you ask me, it's the process that has value. It's when going into the experience that people confront themselves and overcome their fears, and it's when coming out of the experience that people view the world and their lives with a fresh perspective. And even when something genuinely extraordinary does happen while "you" aren't there, it remains without any context until you return to analyze it.

No, egolessness isn't useful. But I would argue that ego loss is.

^Sounds great.

I'm going to visit my family for my dad's 60th birthday, flying out today. My brother is picking me up from the airport and I'm gonna hang out with him and his wife tonight. I asked him, hey bro, are we gonna drunk tonight for St Patty's day?

His reply: "well we're not gonna get sober tonight, I can tell you that much."

Sounds like a blast, try not to do too much damage.