On coke and meth right now. After 2 long months without touching tweak, I relapsed. How strange that I can handle its power now, I can stand the heart racing and have come to terms with the paranoia. I hate this drug, yet due to recent events it calls to me as I feel as tho I've hit rock bottom. I'm glad that the stash I hid from so long ago is very meager, as I am certain it will surely soon run out so that I will have none to use in the future. I guess that even tho I relasped into a state of self loathing and moderate depression, there's hope for me yet. I've given into the darkside, but I know I will be able to crawl out of this pit of regret that I've dug so deep in the hardened earth known as my psyche. My sanity will no longer be a lost and seen as a pariah of underlying dementia to the unwashed masses of prolatariat consumerites who sit on the shoulders of the voiceless demogogue that they call democratic enslavery and sinful defiance of the holy severed head that commands them to obey the decay of modern granduer. I'm not sure if this life is even real anymore due to the fact that the nonexistant retaliatory mendicants rejoice when they see me fail in my every aspect of daily life. They scoffed and laughed when I had that car wreck which I now have to go to court over as it was seen as my fault and now the passenger from the other car claims to have whiplash so the case has now turned into a medical issue. My car came out basically totaled, while the other drivers car had no much as a scratch. Its all a scam, they just think I'm some rich fuck that they can hit up for money like everyone else tries to. Their all out to get me, I swear it. Everybody wants to fuck with my life in whatever way they can. Their all gonna pay for it soon, as I shall have my revenge when the day of reckoning comes to pass. I shall leave them all in a pile of flaming death, as I tear a swathe of chaos across this horrible world. Have you seen this barren land laid to waste, ravaged scorched and frozen by their neglect. I am the formless one I came to save, you are the chosen ones you'll be my slaves! Decay of granduer, from riches to rot! I know I'm insane, theres no turning back, never again shall I take part in smoking crack, if some one offers I'll give em a smack....to their face I'll say "no way, I'm goin clean" cold turkey is the way you gotta do it, hard as it may be you betta go through it and just goddamn do it. Destroy this horrid nation outright, you motherfuckers know I ain't goin down without a damn fight, aight? I am not the master of layin the so called smackdown, I'm just a fool who knows how to get down. Turn your world upside down and you'll understand where I'm comin from. Just stop n take a minute to recollect the inject of your heroin advantage, sent from the gods of opium derilect directive synergies, you know that their really your sworn archrival enemies. This gift I've been given, shall be driven like a car to the nearest bar and totaled like a modulator at a stoplight, rearending a truck called sanity outright. Kill your gods and democrats, destroy them one by one with your cerebral gat!