the other side
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2001
- Messages
- 18
right now
i dont know
what to do
think
feel
act
say
to make it better
make it go away?
what can i do
to find osme faith in you?
but maybe its not you
it's me.
i need to find some faith
just a little bit
in myself.
but now?
but how?
how do you think i should feel?
i'm never good enough
and you always are.
right now you're sleeping,
and i'm up
thinking.
what does that tell you?
what should it tell me?
(i cant figure you out)
so many others want you
i'm woried
you'll want them
instead of me.
i want you too
but i don thtink
i'm good enough
or that i compare.
i wish this was easier.
i wish i could take you in my arms
and know you're only mine
only mine.
but i cant do that
yet.
i'm still afraid
you'll find someone better
because you havent stopped looking.
you're sleeping
and i'm up,
thinking.
what does this tell you?
my emotions get too involved
maybe i'm afraid of falling too fast
because this
is so new
to me.
i told you before
i'm jealous
i dont want to lose you
you mean something to me
you always will.
i just dont want to get hurt.
thats what i'm afraid of,
getting hurt -
again.
i still have scars healing form the past.
you can try to assure me
that you will be true to me
but sometimes the thing syou say
make me have doubt
and htis doubt grows inside of me
getting stronger all the time.
dont force me to teach you a lesson.
dont make me hurt you
so you can finally see
for the first time
how it feels
to be turned down
slapped in the face
broken
alone
not wanted
by the one you want most.
you're sleeping,
and still i'm up thinkiing,
writing volumes of my heart.
the first inspiration to write
that i've had in a long time.
others would give up so much
to hear the words you say to me.
but still the doubt takes over me,
because i can't call you mine.
and even though i've stopped looking around
for anyone else
you haven't.
and that feeds my doubt daily
tearing at my heart,
but who am i to say
you cant do that?
because you're not only mine
though i wish you were.
i'm writing this to you as you sleep
i just want to crawl in bed next to you
and hold you
and have you hold me.
but i'm not so sure you still want to do that.
maybe i'm thinking too much
i probably am.
i always do.
but like i said before,
i dont want to get hurt,
and i dont want that for you, either.
but i'm thinking
would you get hurt?
do you feel as much fo rme
as i do
for you?
or in time
would i be forgotten,
like the rest?
you have quite a past
but i'm willing to forget that
but do you see
that i've stopped looking at my options
because i only want you?
are you willing to do the same for me?
but right now you're not thinking about that
i am.
i'm up thinking,
and you're sleeping.
------------------
can you see through it all? can you see... me?
i dont know
what to do
think
feel
act
say
to make it better
make it go away?
what can i do
to find osme faith in you?
but maybe its not you
it's me.
i need to find some faith
just a little bit
in myself.
but now?
but how?
how do you think i should feel?
i'm never good enough
and you always are.
right now you're sleeping,
and i'm up
thinking.
what does that tell you?
what should it tell me?
(i cant figure you out)
so many others want you
i'm woried
you'll want them
instead of me.
i want you too
but i don thtink
i'm good enough
or that i compare.
i wish this was easier.
i wish i could take you in my arms
and know you're only mine
only mine.
but i cant do that
yet.
i'm still afraid
you'll find someone better
because you havent stopped looking.
you're sleeping
and i'm up,
thinking.
what does this tell you?
my emotions get too involved
maybe i'm afraid of falling too fast
because this
is so new
to me.
i told you before
i'm jealous
i dont want to lose you
you mean something to me
you always will.
i just dont want to get hurt.
thats what i'm afraid of,
getting hurt -
again.
i still have scars healing form the past.
you can try to assure me
that you will be true to me
but sometimes the thing syou say
make me have doubt
and htis doubt grows inside of me
getting stronger all the time.
dont force me to teach you a lesson.
dont make me hurt you
so you can finally see
for the first time
how it feels
to be turned down
slapped in the face
broken
alone
not wanted
by the one you want most.
you're sleeping,
and still i'm up thinkiing,
writing volumes of my heart.
the first inspiration to write
that i've had in a long time.
others would give up so much
to hear the words you say to me.
but still the doubt takes over me,
because i can't call you mine.
and even though i've stopped looking around
for anyone else
you haven't.
and that feeds my doubt daily
tearing at my heart,
but who am i to say
you cant do that?
because you're not only mine
though i wish you were.
i'm writing this to you as you sleep
i just want to crawl in bed next to you
and hold you
and have you hold me.
but i'm not so sure you still want to do that.
maybe i'm thinking too much
i probably am.
i always do.
but like i said before,
i dont want to get hurt,
and i dont want that for you, either.
but i'm thinking
would you get hurt?
do you feel as much fo rme
as i do
for you?
or in time
would i be forgotten,
like the rest?
you have quite a past
but i'm willing to forget that
but do you see
that i've stopped looking at my options
because i only want you?
are you willing to do the same for me?
but right now you're not thinking about that
i am.
i'm up thinking,
and you're sleeping.
------------------
can you see through it all? can you see... me?
