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You might be a stoner if...

...wonder if they could make a vacuum that would separate weed particles from all others.
 
nautilus said:
...wonder if they could make a vacuum that would separate weed particles from all others.
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Lol this is qft on my behalf.. aaannndd now have this to contrib:
***Forgot wtf you were just going to quote because you forgot to check before the reply page loaded, only to just now realize that the same posts are below the reply box here in which i am typing... hahaha... yeah..

so, totally relate to 'choosing weed over tylenol for headache'.. ask anyone, weed is my ibuprofen i swear lol
 
*you forget the language you have spoken from birth
Complete lack of sentence structure

*Your legs forget how to walk
(I tend to hop and make up for it "Look I'm a giant green easter bunny" I was wearing a neon green sweater)

*You forget what you were just talking about or how you even got on what you forgot what you were talking about
 
*if you come to this thread and laugh for 10 minutes cause your already stoned
 
You hesitate to own a cell phone as loosing and finding it 6 times a week gets to much.
 
*Eating Ramen noodles is a MAJOR cost effective move.

*You believe random things, statues or your cat, are staring at you

*If you can't remember the last time you weren't stoned

*You spend time trying to come up with things to write in this thread but you are too stoned to remember anything
 
*when you forget that you've already smoked up*
*when you accidently spin your weed twice*
*when you keep looking for the cone that you just packed and its already in the bong -.-*
 
you're suddenly hit by a life-changing revelation, but when you grab a pen you forget what it was. you try and remember, only to forget why you're holding a pen. you drop it, walk away (towards the TV), sit down and are hit by another revelation...

Pillthrill said:
*choose weed for a headache before considering Tylenol
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one time I actually chose weed for a sore throat....... and it worked!
 
sleeping pains said:
you're suddenly hit by a life-changing revelation, but when you grab a pen you forget what it was. you try and remember, only to forget why you're holding a pen. you drop it, walk away (towards the TV), sit down and are hit by another revelation...
Click to expand...

This reminds me of a quote about how the creative and inventive way of thinking while stoned is wasted because you can't muster up the focus or motivation to put it to use.

It's true, I can't learn any new songs on the guitar while stoned...only play those I've memorized while I was sober.
 
When you grow concerned if your stash goes less then half an ounce.

When you dealers arent concerned if you cant pay for 2 days as you normally allow them to buy pounds (be very regular)

When you bulk buy deoderiser so your parents dont smell.

When your friends remark you dont smoke "like a person"

When it takes you longer to get stoned then to have a cigerette.

When you have run out of spin before you run out of weed.

If you keep a 2 litre water bottle hidden in your garden in case you get cotton mouth.

You buy a coffee grinder because your eternally pissed that it takes so long with scissors.

If you wipe down the table you smoke at and are able to come up with 10 cones.

If you can look on your floor and find atleast a g.

If you ever cache your stash (5g here, 5 g there)

If you have forgotten about hiding in different places.

If you have run out and then torn your house apart trying to find those places.

If someone asked do you have anything in your system before you drive. And your forced to answer yes, maybe you can wait 6 months before you dont.

Your sure your body fat would make awesome brownies.

There are alot more i just have to remember.
 
From personel experience:

When you use thrush cream instead of toothpaste. ( I did this two days ago much to the amusement of my daughter).

When you sit staring at the tv wondering when the program will start, only to realise you forgot to turn it on.

When you flick ash in your beer.

When the joint sticks to your lips and the glowing red end sticks between your fingers.

When you momentarily forget your wife's name (really bad).

When you're having a bad day, then get excited at the thought of that first toke.

When you pass the spliff on, then realise you're on your own.
 
yesterday going down stairs knew no man called jerry garcia for the four clovers he sometimes was carried with down into a Technicolor miracle birth child created solely for the subsistence of none are particles grown to the limits of everything inside I slid down the hallway expecting TJ on my side but knowing that on Wednesdays TJ is committed to the oil's factory up on riverside hill apart from the rest of the story I really didn't mamas in the basement mixin up the medicine I'm on the pavement thinking bout the government man in a trench coat badge out laid off says he's got a bad cough wants to get it paid off and hip skip bip tid mig mih mie mir miw msi there were two times when general hope and spree no not now take the blue blop out of focus and put back in the things he said as he reaches over to make use of the cameras then unexpectedly the pope appears ridiculed and discovered by mass zimbi an effect terminated manasticaed pastificaed all around the singular bronx neighborhood of peoples plaza where one day a pigeon arrives signaling the start of events there were three leaders a chinese one and a russian one and a american one and they all took speed and all brushed there hair and some shit not knowing that what is required takes baths momentarily on the eternal cerebral palsy victim like two friends of his appropriately called forth to witness what has been created by the two sides.
 
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