Ok, so I'm not completely clean (I'm still taking my daily regimen of benzos, and I'm also pretty stoned right now...) but I've been off meth for at least two weeks now. Somewhere along the way I lost count of the days, but it's definitely been a couple of weeks. Fuck, I think this is the longest I've stayed off meth in the whole year! 
There's an NA meeting tonight, but I don't think I'll go for a couple of reasons: 1) I'm still at Lydia's place in Auckland, and by the time I get back to my home city, the meeting will probably be nearly finished. 2) I'm starting to feel that NA isn't for me.
NA takes the "abstinence" approach when it comes to drugs (hell, even alcohol and tobacco at my group!), whereas I prefer harm reduction. I want to get my drug use under control, and use safely, rather than stopping completely. I see no problem in smoking an occasional bowl of weed or popping an E. And I will probably be on some form of medication for the rest of my life, so total abstinence won't really work for me.
But I'm glad I'm finally off meth. Most of the withdrawals have faded (with a little help from my friends clonazepam and triazolam), although I've still got some restlessness and cravings going on. If somebody offered me a baggie right now, I don't think I would be strong enough to refuse that. Hopefully in time I'll gain more control over this drug, because I'd actually love to go back to using it occasionally, instead of every day of the week like I used to.
Lydia and I are thinking about becoming "fortnightly warriors" with meth. We're planning to do a tiny amount (like a point) once every two weeks. I hope it works out, but I understand how addiction works and I know how difficult it can be to lower your intake of a hard drug once you've become addicted to it. But we'll see how it goes! If we start using more frequently, we've both agreed that we'll stop using for good.
There's an NA meeting tonight, but I don't think I'll go for a couple of reasons: 1) I'm still at Lydia's place in Auckland, and by the time I get back to my home city, the meeting will probably be nearly finished. 2) I'm starting to feel that NA isn't for me.
NA takes the "abstinence" approach when it comes to drugs (hell, even alcohol and tobacco at my group!), whereas I prefer harm reduction. I want to get my drug use under control, and use safely, rather than stopping completely. I see no problem in smoking an occasional bowl of weed or popping an E. And I will probably be on some form of medication for the rest of my life, so total abstinence won't really work for me.
But I'm glad I'm finally off meth. Most of the withdrawals have faded (with a little help from my friends clonazepam and triazolam), although I've still got some restlessness and cravings going on. If somebody offered me a baggie right now, I don't think I would be strong enough to refuse that. Hopefully in time I'll gain more control over this drug, because I'd actually love to go back to using it occasionally, instead of every day of the week like I used to.
Lydia and I are thinking about becoming "fortnightly warriors" with meth. We're planning to do a tiny amount (like a point) once every two weeks. I hope it works out, but I understand how addiction works and I know how difficult it can be to lower your intake of a hard drug once you've become addicted to it. But we'll see how it goes! If we start using more frequently, we've both agreed that we'll stop using for good.
)