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Writing Challenge: Write your self-portrait!

Raz

Raz

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 11, 2002
Messages
7,329
Location
In an igloo made of asbestos and chicken-wire.
Judging by the number of posts in the Pics of Our Poets thread, there is a healthy desire amongst the lot of us to have ourselves plastered all over teh intarnets....well, this is basically the same thing but with a Words slant...I want you to write a self-portrait; write a piece about yourself, a piece which tells us something about your personality. It can be poetry, a short story, the script of the movie of your life, go nuts!

I have written a piece that I'll post up here this week, but it's currently sitting in an exercise book at home because I forgot to bring it to the internet cafe with me...d'oh! In the meantime, why don't y'all start us off and I'll add mine in a couple of days time?

:)
 
When I walk through doors
My manbanana gets caught
On the hairpins of soulwatchers
It is so large
I had to file it as a deadly weapon
There are no apples big enough
To feed the hunger in my groin
To cage the lion in my loin
To inflate the value of my coin
When I take my pants off
It goes boing boing boing
One day I will respect women
But for now
I see them as cows
Full of milk and prosperity
We dance in the moonlight
I will milk thee.

I will milk thee.
 
An unborn dreamer, with hopes-not lies
The failed schemer that roams the skies
My primordial ooze slithers and shakes
To the tune of wist its private dance makes
Optimism clairvoyant, disaster-blind
The sight of my failures is in your mind
Tense for most peaceful relaxations
Giddy for the prospect of influencing nations
All sweeps and surveys underscore
A lust for adventure, nothing more.
 
boing boing boing

hehe.. :)

As threatened, here is my contribution; the first two verses came really easily and I think they're quite good....I'm not so happy about the last two, I think they're a bit crapola....critique at will!

******************

I am the unbroken man, made new every day like the sun in the sky.
I know too much to rage because it all comes undone, so sweetly undone.
How many lives I've lived to come to this place, to reach such heights of enlightenment where love is as free as the air and as nourishing.
How evolved I am.

I am the self-possessed child, consumed in awe of a world that performs tricks for me.
How curious I am of such curiosities, creatures that breathe for our mutual amusement.
Everything is experienced for the first and best time, and no shadows exist in this burning house of glass.
I have so much to learn.

I am the monster without depth of perception.
An angry throwback consumed by flawed introspection.
I hide in the dark and wail at the stars, because they are more than I am.
I think I'm more special than I am.

Every facet of a wall of mirrors bounces the light so differently, but light never lies.
All of these faces will serve me well, and not so well.
I am my own worst enemy and the best patron I could know.
I am as unique as you.
 
Raz...I like it. It just seems so twisted. Your opinion of yourself seems to devolve as the piece goes on. And then you reveal the monster inside all of us ever so stealthily, but it hits like a hurricane. It reads to me as a sardonic characterization of humanity using the only test subject you truly know-yourself.

Ah shit. I guess this leaves my popcorn trite up for critique as well. All's fair in words and war. Have fun:)
 
great idea, I've dug everything that's been posted so far. ya'll are liek deep and stuff :D

when drugs hit the table, I put them there
and you know I smoke weed like I'm just breathing air
a flare for the shady. pretty crazy.
just a gun tote'n liberal stacking funds cause they make me
so fight the man with money, passion and music
I like action and using
fast cash and moving
smack, grass, and shrooms kid
so step back and view this
last stab at beauty
silence
sit in zen
feel the earth
and the sky over head
thank the food
smell the dirt
find a place
and enlight in worth
 
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Raz said:
I am the unbroken man, made new every day like the sun in the sky.
I know too much to rage because it all comes undone, so sweetly undone.
How many lives I've lived to come to this place, to reach such heights of enlightenment where love is as free as the air and as nourishing.
How evolved I am.

I am the self-possessed child, consumed in awe of a world that performs tricks for me.
How curious I am of such curiosities, creatures that breathe for our mutual amusement.
Everything is experienced for the first and best time, and no shadows exist in this burning house of glass.
I have so much to learn.

I am the monster without depth of perception.
An angry throwback consumed by flawed introspection.
I hide in the dark and wail at the stars, because they are more than I am.
I think I'm more special than I am.

Every facet of a wall of mirrors bounces the light so differently, but light never lies.
All of these faces will serve me well, and not so well.
I am my own worst enemy and the best patron I could know.
I am as unique as you.
Click to expand...

I like that! It caught my attention right away. I especially like the last line. Keep it Transgaian, buddy!
 
Fantastic thread idea, Raz! :) And I love the honesty and humility in your self-portrait.

Benefit's self-portrait is truly a thing of beauty! :D
 
Self-portrait

I am open
and open
and open
(we never close, so why
should the city
sleep?)

City be slow with me,
city slow down; I love you but
I must get treed, rivered,
rocked, beached,
and often

Back home on my body,
hair grows like wild grass;
back home in my eye,
something quick and approximate
(of the whole perfect whole)

You asked to see a photo, but
I asked for paper
to write on

I am colourised wires, ant colony,
wide area network,
landmass seen from an airplane window

I am those
and those
and those

(sometimes
I look very familiar)

I am the words
we squeezed out of nature
which with use
became unusable
(I am looking for
the new words
to give back)

I want to plant lamps

I am aiming
to be skilful
(as in apple-healthy,
jam-calm,
monkey-wise)

I am walking around
no armour, no cloak
(I look pretty strange)

I am yes
and yes
and yes

and here
and here

(I’m so glad
you could make it)
 
^^^At the risk of sounding like mutual admiration society....I love that. You have touched so many bases there, and all so expertly...these lines in particular I think are awesome;
You asked to see a photo, but
I asked for paper
to write on

I am colourised wires, ant colony,
wide area network,
landmass seen from an airplane window

I am those
and those
and those
Click to expand...
..but I would have to post pretty much the whole thing to say everything I loved about it.. :)
 
soliloquay in the tune of sorrow

i don't belong here anymore
i don't belong anywhere, anymore

i am only a vagabond
i am only a derelict
just debris waiting to be shuffled around
just me waiting to be let down


hanging around
bringing everyone down
don't ask me how
when i rode into town
there were only hopes and dreams abound
and look at me now

i don't belong here anymore
i don't belong anywhere, anymore

i am so sick of living in this perpetual desperation
i am so sick of creating this celestial desolation
it is impossible to change this inherent destination
it is impossible to change this hereditary mutation

i am only a vagabond
a wastrel, lost and truly alone
debris that has been weather beaten
debris that has grown

up from the heap
and out from the norm
i don't belong here anymore
i don't belong anywhere, anymore
 
Wordy: So your self portrait is one of complexity and confusion? ;) nice piece

I like your's too status tickles. I'm sorry you're so sad though.
 
What do you see that does not reach my eyes?
Ponder this as I wonder, seeking as I write
Of a princely poet who writes his own reality
Wisdom witheld til the last breath

Aquarian sun shines brilliant
Chilled and unique
A snowflake
Drifting

Agog
 
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Watching, i don't make much sound
Assessing, i blindly feel round
The game, as it's played by the tune
A headache, the sun's behind the moon

A mirror, that sports many faces
Many occupations, behind me with graces
A shoe fetish, different pair every day
Black painted scars, to remind of the way

As rain falls, so does the world ends
In darkness, i can't see my own bends
With effort, i work to change mind
And focus, to follow though in kind

To sunshine, and heavenly bliss
With roses, give thorns a slight kiss
Hurt lips, i pay them no jive
Tastes of blood, remind me i'm alive.
 
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