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Write a letter to someone who may never read it! >>> v. 2

of course its a bad idea for us to meet, its a bad idea for me to treat you like i used to.
i want so much for things to be different
i wanted so much for things to be different
its slowly fading into the past now, just like you are
when will come the day when you realise whats happened
and once again we slip through each others fingers?
happiness so close but like a ghost

i wish i could wish you all the best
the bitterness inside wont let me be that mature
im still a child who still believes in fairytales

there should be a single word for love and hate

I _____ you
xo
 
You...

You have messed my head up...and I still want more, coz I know you didn't mean to.

OK, to be honest it was my fault, I knew ya just split up from that dude we both knew wasn't right for you, and that you had a lot on your mind...

BUT WHY DID YOU GO SAYING ALL THOSE THINGS?!?!?!?Then dismiss it all when you turn around and say all the other stuff a week later - IN VINO VERITAS.
I was fucked too!! I remember almost every word, but I was tripping balls...
Actions speak louder than words, and there was plenty of both.

So I got the greenlight over & over, and didn't think about the consequences enough (still, enough to not do anything we'd both really regret) - that's surely not a first, and I know this ain't why you're mad at me...

I'm not actually sure why you're mad at me per se - except for the fact I couldn't keep my fucking big mouth shut... and it's cost me what chance I had with you it seems.

I just hope that thursday night's apology gesture to come will make you smile, and it probably won't make things all better just like that *zap* but will show you I'm sincere, and I just fucked up...

SO I'm sorry - really sorry... coz we've had amazing chemistry for the past few months, tears, much laughter...
You're the one person apart from T***a who I could really dance with as one energy on the dancefloor...we bind together in so many silly ways, I can't believe I fucked it up...

THe one person who has actually said they really enjoy my musky man smell I wear with pride in order to find the right woman, and wore my scarf to her burlesque audition and wore it on their pillow.

The one person who I least expected to start with, the person who for some reason intimidated me when I first met you...and I told you this...
The person who I can realistically see myself with in a relationship with, which lets face it hasn't happened at all since Lucia...

The one person, who when I slept in your bed, with your cats, and your messy state of a room, made me feel at home...it felt right...

Now to see where this leaves us...

Fuck I want you...I'm crazy about you...and I'm prepared wait til your head's in the right place.

And I don't want to stop til I get you... But until you're talking to me again properly I'm gonna take a step back apart from the "I'm Sorry" in many colourful stolen flowers you'll receive on your lawn.
 
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X,

I want out. I've been feeling less and less attracted to you lately and I don't know how to tell you. I know it's been over a week now, but I still can't stop thinking about the freakout I had.. I'm still really mad at you for what you did, and even though I act like nothing is wrong, that's only because dwelling on it and bringing it up again only makes me more miserable too. That doesn't mean I've forgiven you; I haven't.

You're cute.. funny.. really sweet and well-intentioned. I know you love me more than a lot of people. That's what makes this so difficult. You're also too irresponsible, inconsiderate, and dependent for me to deal with anymore. You just need to grow up.. I don't want somebody to take care of me.. Fuck that.. But I don't want to have to take care of somebody else either. I'm no babysitter, but I always feel like I have to pick up your slack.

I'm not looking forward to having this conversation with you, but I know it's coming. I have no idea what we'll both do for living arrangements afterward.. What a mess this will be. :(
 
Dear A

I have only known you for a little over 2 months now (and it's because we work together) and I wish with everything in my soul that you were mine. Most of the girls that I meet I can tell right away that a relationship would never work, but with you A there is something different. I admire your drive and ambition and I've thought that you were beautiful from the moment I met you.

I have been lonely for years now and yearned for someone to spend time with. I have made mistakes and turned to drugs to fill up the emptiness in my soul. I am still an addict but I have been searching for something to give me the motivation to change my life. You could be the light through the clouds for me, you could fill the void in my soul. But you don't even know.

So I have always thought it would be nice to have a girlfriend like you, but I know you have a boyfriend and so it's never been more than a fleeting thought in my mind. Even if you were single, I am too shy to make any moves and I have a pretty low self esteem so still it would only be something nice to think of occasionally, certainly nothing worth getting excited or hopeful about. Then when our other coworker K comes up and tells me that you've got "such a thing for me and think I am the cutest thing", my heart aches. I know you are in a relationship and I could never ask anyone to break up with someone else for me so once again I feel I have reached a dead end. It feels nice to think that someone like you could like me, but I cannot take that energy and move onto someone else because I like YOU. It goes deeper than a physical attraction - I know that you are beautiful but it's your mind and soul that I think I am falling for. You are not like most of the girls that I have met - you are a kind person and you are also so hard working and determined. I suppose what it comes down to is that I ADMIRE you. I feel all of these things and I have never even seen you out of work or been on a date with you. I think that the more I know you the more I would like you.

So now, knowing that you take at least some kind of an interest in me is having a strong effect on me. I think about you a lot now, and I have began to open myself up to you while trying not to get excited because deep down the pessimist in me knows that it's all for nothing. I want to take you out on a date, I want to hold your hand and smile and feel that connection that I haven't felt in years. Most of all, I want to quit the opiates and move onto a life more rewarding. But I know that in the end this will pass me by just like everything else and I will continue to be lonely and fill up the void with drugs.

I want you to be happy so I hope your boyfriend is a great guy and that he's better than me, but I can't help but wonder what could be if things had only been slightly different.
 
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i love you and maybe what we're doing IS fucking with our heads but it's obvious neither one of us wants to let go. i wish i could explain what i know in my gut without it sounding like a delusion but you will only ever understand if you explore that world yourself.

i'm sorry for what i said and i know you're not mad and don't hold it against me but i still feel like it's created a rift between us. only time will tell...

<3
 
I am longing to close my eyes
To hold you and kiss you so tender
Joyfully waiting for your sign of delight and surrender.
You take me to places I have never been
Every moment I'm with you I change for the better within
And it's always surreal how you make my life seem
Ever since I laid eyes on you it's like I'm living a dream
 
D,

The only thing I said to you today was, 'Oh. Sorry' but I really did mean it, even though it wasn't important.

Regards,
UAN

PS. Your Movember mo is fucking awesome.
 
Dear M,

It has not been two weeks since we separated and so much has happened already. You've apparently met new people, done stuff you say you've always wanted to, and most of all met someone to fill my gap already. Two years, two amazingly fun and sacred years to me, are thrown out the window now, discarded for little apparent reason. Today you flew to hawaii for thanksgiving break. For the first time in a very long time i haven't heard from you or said something to you in over 24 hours. I check my phone here and there, hoping, praying deep down that you'll say something to me. I miss you, but I can't let myself hold onto the false belief that you will change your mind and come back; i can't keep a relationship with a girl who moved on and away from me so quickly. We loved each other so much, we were supposed to get married, buy a house, make a family. Two years is a long time to be stuck with someone, i get it, but we could have at least talked together, face to face instead of over the phone. What a disappointment.

-W
 
foreign girl: I guess I scared you off, either that or you're already seeing someone else, no big deal.

Out of town girl: I'm interested, but unfortunately I don't think you are.

Older girl: I can't tell what it is, if anything, that you want. And I have no idea what I want either...
 
Dear J
Hey every time I see you I want to hold you, close to my heart so I can feel the warmth of your breasts. We smoke bud all the time together, we are both single, we are both madly in love with each other, but why, why can't either of us make the first move?
Your best friend
-d
 
Hello, Bluelighter! Oh shit, you are reading this! I guess this is not a letter to someone who may never read it then. :P But really, I am curious if anyone ever reads posts they do not write in this thread.
 
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Dear AH,

I know it's crazy. I know it's all wrong. My head is so messed up right now. If i tell you, would you smile? if i tell you, would you call me a perv? if i tell you, would you run away? How do i get myself into these situations. everything is totally messed up. You know when you meet someone, you just have that connection. It shouldn't be this time...but it is. It risks everything. It's not logical. im not THAT guy...but maybe i am THAT guy? and if i am THAT guy, does going for it make me happy or rip my life to shreds? How can you ask me to do that? All i know is that when i am with you, nothing else matters. everything is happy, serene, sexy, funny, and hot as hell. I get that adreneline, that stinky sweaty musty feeling and i smell it on you too. i know the way you look at me. you dont even have to say anything, your eyes give it away. your scent gives it away. it is just right. we fit. you are my missing piece...and i cant have you. you bring me such warmth but you bring me such pain. you are the happiness i've been waiting for and i cannot have you. sure, i can wait. but if i wait, the time will pass, the moment will disappear. life will move on, carry me away to my boring oblivion...rolling out like the tide sucking out the spirit from my life. how can life be so cruel? how can i end up in this place, seeing my happiness...yet there she sits, perched on a jagged mountain top, unreachable by mortal man. there you are, like a siren, medusa, tormenting me, mocking me, inspiring me to greatness. can i reach you? should i touch you? will it burn me, break me, eat me, beat me? i know you. i love you. and i cant have you. the moments we spend together are my heaven. know that. if i let you go, will you come back to me when the time is right? will you be there for my happiness? You must know that chemistry like this comes along so infrequently...then why should we be denied? ah fml. trapped in a place of obstenent hell, tantalizingly close, yet it can only be a fantasy. take me away from this life and bring me to our eden, where we can run and play and be and love and i can hold you, touch you, be with you.

but it is all just a fantasy, the wall is too high as you can see.

-MLE
 
Jube,
I miss you every day and wish you were still around to party with. You were one awesome dude. Your life ended way too soon. You will always hold a part of my heart, you crazy mother fucker :)

Jay,
Fuck you asshole. Nice way to treat a friend. I won't even give you the pleasure of saying kiss my lilly white arse cause apparently my arse is comparable to a square pillar.

S,
You're lucky you're still breathing. I hope you die a slow painful death.


XXX,
Thanks for being a totally awesome friend. You've been there for me more than my supposedly 'friends'. Plus your fucking awesome. ♥ u, u sexy weirdo ;) :D

V,
Sorry about mum, hope the flight went well. Wish I was a better friend and was able to be there for you. I miss you bad. ♥ u sista phreak. <3
 
please stop telling me none sense. i know you mean it when you say it, but you have a hard time keeping your word and this little girl has no idea what a promise is nor does she need to think they're meant to be broken.
 
Dear Jen,

After all these years I am glad I finally got to see your smile! I am so grateful that you forgave me for that incident 9 years ago in the restaraunt with my ex....I should have manned up and not let her push away a great friend like I let her! It bugged me all these years, but am glad I finally got to say sorry and I get to have a great friend back!
 
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