Being caught on mushrooms with a spaced out kid with a criminal record, no license to verify who I am, with, get this, a TURTLE!
We went all the way to this arboritum one day after taking an eighth each of finie cubes, prepared with oj in a blender for faster onset. Only to find out once we got there, their closed on Monday's, for whatever reason. So, I park on the side of the road, we hop the fence, and maybe spend half hour max (beautiful place).
Anyhow, as I'm walking along I see something in the distance that appears to be a rock, yet I can see its energy and realize its a living thing. I creep closer and closer (very strong vivid memories of this) and can not believe my eyes, its a turtle (as ordinary as that sounds), and I couldn't believe such a creature could exist. So, being a reptile entrepreneur (baby turtle, painted I believe), I put him in my bag with plans on releasing him in my pond (i had a rather large koi pond at the time). I now think this was wrong, animals should never be taken out of the wild and I firmly believe that now, but alas I wasn't in the clearest of heads.
Anyhow we get back into the car, I find a small but comfortable box to put him in, both doors are open no seatbelts on. Up comes this ornory fucking pissed off cop, so he asks my friend what we were doing there. Cop asks me "what ya got there?" referring to the turtle, but before I have a chance to let him know its my pet turtle I just bought from the petstore down the road, my idiot friend answers "we took it from the park."
Then the prick seperates us both, hands on car, all that shit. He was trying to bag me because I had long dreads and bellbottoms on and a messenger bag, looking for a big "score." So the prick starts searching my car, to which I reply "pardon me, sir, but I give you no consent to search my vehicle." He comes back with "your harboring turtles." My jaw dropped.
We had no drugs in the car (never do while I'm out and about tripping, which I don't do any more anyway unless i'm on foot).
Well after a lot of bad noise, accusations of being high, sobriety tests etc, bastard lets me go with 4 fucking tickets, 2 park tickets and 1 no license and 1 no seatbelt (keys werent in the ignition, but he's the cop and does what he likes). Then we're on our merry way, all for the sake of a little turtle.
It was a victory in my eyes, because I was peaking hard the whole time, and he couldn't tell. He kept asking me "are you high?", to which my response was simply I'm straight edge, my brother died of a heroin overdose, thanks for bringing it up though. Fuck that guy, he was real douch nozzle.