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Witnessing someone else saying what your actually saying?

angryteabag

angryteabag

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 12, 2010
Messages
96
I was driving down the road last night with a bunch of mates and there was this taxi parked up. we drove passed it and i look over at my mate driving

My mate starts talking about how the taxi driver could be real fucked up and come and eat your babies and fuck them and all this random dark shit.

I look at him and am like "what the fuck are you talking about man"
he says "what do you mean, are you alright?"
I say "what are you on about?"
He says "You were talking some really fucked up things just then"

and apparently i was the one saying all that shit about the taxi baby eater thing. To me i was watching him say that to me. but i was saying it. I HAD NO IDEA.

I had smoked weed and there was like crumbs/resin of jwh legal alternatives in the bong.

I'm normally a very lucid guy, why the fuck did i pull a full on "stabby vibe"

I remember leading up to that point i was tripping a little. i would see shapes of shit in windows and all sorts. felt really disconnected. then we drove passed the taxi and i phased out into a dream-like state. kind of snapped out of it when my mate was like "you ok". felt like i was peaking on something.

My mates wern't messing with me, they all heard me. they stuck to their story even after i told them i was having a full blown bad trip. They are the type of people who wouldn't fuck with someone if they were genuinely shitting them selves

That night was intense as well, i stayed up till 5am. my face was really hot and my body temp had dropped. i was shaking, felt really fucking wrong. had the whole cant breathe panic attack then eventually passed out from exhaustion. up till that point, I had been having really shit sleep. like for the last 2 weeks i have been going to sleep at 3am and waking at 10 still tired.

fuck, i must be really fucked up inside to be talking about that sort of shit. thats really dark. i must have some fucking demons or something. I feel like i must be psychotic..

fuuuuuuck.... I just need to get this out somewhere, i cant really tell mates this. any advise or personal experience would be very appreciated. I'm taking a break from drugs...

thanks
 
I dont know. i thought so at first but i'm pretty sure they wern't.

They would've given me more shit about it and tried to mess with me more. they were just like "wtf?" and havent mentioned it since.
I'm feeling pretty out of it at the moment and its the morning after.
 
Could just be that you reacted differently to the weed/jwh on that day. It's certainly possible to have very difficult experiences with extreme anxiety/paranoia from weed.

Doesn't mean you are psychotic or fucked up because of what was said. Thoughts are just thoughts. Most of the thoughts that pass through people's heads could pass for insanity or at least neuroses.

Taking a break can't hurt :)
 
I also think your friends are messing with you, as I told you before your thread was closed in OD. You had only smoked weed, with only little traces of jwh? Any other drugs that night? It just doesn't seem like you're psychotic, you got too high and just need a solid night of rest and a recovery day after that happening.
 
yeah i'll definitely take a break for a while. I've had a bad reaction to JWH before.

I just need to eat some food, get some rest, chill out haha.

I'm just worried that my little psyco breakdown mite lead to something worse. I actually felt like i was still high again this morning. i smoked it at like 2am and now its 1.40pm the next day and i only just feel like im coming down to baseline, it wasn't a weed buzz though.

Maybe i shouldn't read too far into this...
 
I know exactly what you mean. I very often get these dark thoughts too and it sorta fucks with you. It makes you think that these thoughts are the real you trying to get out and the drug is just letting you do it. Your high so often and you get these thoughts so frequently that they become your reality. High is the new sober, so high thought is confused with real thought.
But I dont know if this is your case, just mine.
I was having some real dark thoughts today while watching Natural Born Killers, now that movie gets to you when you're in this sort of state.
 
bryan21 said:
I know exactly what you mean. I very often get these dark thoughts too and it sorta fucks with you. It makes you think that these thoughts are the real you trying to get out and the drug is just letting you do it. Your high so often and you get these thoughts so frequently that they become your reality. High is the new sober, so high thought is confused with real thought.
But I dont know if this is your case, just mine.
I was having some real dark thoughts today while watching Natural Born Killers, now that movie gets to you when you're in this sort of state.
Click to expand...

Haha who doesn't have dark thoughts watching Natural Born Killers? That whole movie is one big psychotic break. Fucking wicked movie though!
 
I just found out my mate was just messing with me. not cool man. not cool.

And I found that out through a friend who he told. At the time when I apparently freaked out in the car, I was chilled about the whole thing at first (like, oh shit, i said that, oh well), then he kept mentioning it and annoying me till i got uncomfortable and had a panic trip.

I canceled an acid trip that weekend because i thought i was turning into one of the few people drugs actually fuck up.

I've never liked that dude. what a douche
 
Legerity said:
Could just be that you reacted differently to the weed/jwh on that day. It's certainly possible to have very difficult experiences with extreme anxiety/paranoia from weed.

Doesn't mean you are psychotic or fucked up because of what was said. Thoughts are just thoughts. Most of the thoughts that pass through people's heads could pass for insanity or at least neuroses.

Taking a break can't hurt :)
Click to expand...

This.
 
"I was driving down the road last night with a bunch of mates and there was this taxi parked up. we drove passed it and i look over at my mate driving"

Who was driving you or him?
 
angryteabag said:
I just found out my mate was just messing with me. not cool man. not cool.

And I found that out through a friend who he told. At the time when I apparently freaked out in the car, I was chilled about the whole thing at first (like, oh shit, i said that, oh well), then he kept mentioning it and annoying me till i got uncomfortable and had a panic trip.

I canceled an acid trip that weekend because i thought i was turning into one of the few people drugs actually fuck up.

I've never liked that dude. what a douche
Click to expand...

Wow, what a fucking asshole.
 
Problem resolved.
now its ur turn to fuck with his head.
Naw thats fucked up but karma will take action eventually imo
 
I've had something similar happen to me. The only difference was that I didn't think someone else said it. I didn't even know I said it. I kinda had to ask why everyone was staring at me like "what in the fuck did you just say buddy?" I was clueless. Once they told me, I think I remembered a fragment of it. However what I remembered wasn't me saying it, it was just the thought in general. If that makes sense. Weird shit.
 
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