Sincere Condolences
Hi Dragonfly,
I've 3 things in common with you. My mum passed away from cancer almost 4 weeks ago. It took her very quickly: In 12 weeks she went from a vibrant 67 year old working phlebotomist, to a tortured skeleton in a hospice bed. It's just begun to hit me.
As a heroin junkie, I relapsed over 2 years ago, in circumstances similar to the bloke who just wanted to get smacked over the weekend.
Cos I basically spend nearly all my cash on brown, and still can't afford my idiot habit, I avoid dope sickness with OxyNorm, the powdered form in capsules, which I prefer to snort but, occasionally eat.
Now. In June 2012 I lost my 33 year old cousin, who was like my little brother, to almost the same cancer that just took my mum (turns out I belong to a "Cancer Family" my maternal grandfather died of it too). I was 300 miles from home. Over the course of three weeks, staying with my eldest son, visiting my dying cuz, then attending his funeral. I ran out of everything. I was skint. I agree: WD from Oxy is Hell. IMO, worse than smack, particularly the monstrous physicality of it. I'm old. It took about 4 days just to even be able to get out of bed to get my arse down to my Dad's, whose GF gave me a sheet of 30mg/500mg Codeine/Paracetamol she was getting off her GP to alleviate her painful dodgy hip prior to a hip replacement operation. Man, did that help - Big Time. Although, I think they were effective due to 4 days Cold Turkey reducing my opiate/opioid tolerance. I tried to drink as much warm/hot water as comfortably possible to pee out the bad stuff and keep myself warm cos I was bonkers cold and it was summer. I used essential oils to relax and ameliorate stress. Bergamot & Lavender are good. Lemon & Tea Tree Oil's good for when you need "uplifting". You don't have to massage it over you. Simply applying a drop to your pulse points works wonders. The human olfactory system is woefully under explored. I also have Rheumatoid Arthritis, which is why I became a junkie six years ago. I used Capsicum capsules to keep my body warm too. Taking a daily broad spectrum multi vitamin, multi mineral tab or cap is essential. Try to eat well, and regularly. Small, but often. So four or five small meals a day rather than three "square" meals. Try to eat clean protein, such as pulses (lentils and beans) as well as low fat lean meat like chicken, rabbit, turkey, rather than beef. Dark green leafy vegetables such as kale are important, as is broccoli. Lettuce is really good because it has a very calming, soothing effect on our system BUT, choose round head butter lettuce rather than iceberg. Fruit, not too much citrus, which is way too acidic. Above all, try to get organically produced food. Right now, you need as few unnecessary chemicals as possible in your body which, as you know, is in desperate recovery mode. Basically, I agree with all the stuff others have said. It's a uniquely individual experience. I reckon that if I keep myself busy every day (like when I got clean for over a year) the psychological aspects of addiction and addictive behaviours is somewhat diminished. Then there's night time. Which is hard. Sleep, or rather the lack of sleep, plus my brain running on like an engine pinking. If you really need an indication of time, then I'd go for between six to nine months until you're reliably compos mentis, as long as you steer clear of alcohol: It's a very easy gateway or trigger for the harder stuff. Even then, it will take years of cautious abstinence before you're "out of the woods".
I don't know if any of what I've babbled will help you or, if it's even cogent or coherent. Most of all, I want to congratulate you on re-igniting the fire in your belly which has enabled you to say No, and mean it. It sure is a difficult time to resume control of your life in areas, which for me, I just couldn't handle right now. I respect and admire your courage. Sorry my ha'penny worth's SO long! Best Wishes to you, for a peaceful year ahead.
