Why I FUCKING HATE The Holidays, Part Two Of *Window Shattering Shriek*

December. Fuckerfucking December.

Raise your hand if you love December hahahahaha, just kidding. I don't care. (Not to mention, none of you did, anyway.)

Let's have a neat list, shall we?

• I can't STAND shopping.
• I can't STAND spending money - I panic like crazy.
• I can't stand buying gifts. More panic (what if it isn't what you wanted? What if you hate it?)
• I can't stand disappointing people, predominantly loved ones. I don't want to crap on my kids' hopes.
• I can't STAND getting gifts. What if I don't like what I've gotten? Then I have to fake as if I like the shit. And I can't toss it or re-gift it if it came from family. I'm stuck with useless crap forever. Yay. Barf.
• I can't stand holiday decorations.
• I can't STAND wrapping shit.
• Although not directly December related, I can't STAND the weather. It's cold as my tit out constantly.
• I have lost too many friends in the month of December.
• It goes: Christmas, my birthday, New Year's Eve so basically, I get "Happy Birthmas" cards or some other dumb shit.
• This both pisses me off and doesn't because I hate getting shit, nevertheless I know I'd get more respect if my day was in April...
• If anyone does bother to acknowledge my birthday, it's with a combo gift "for both events! Cool, right?". Yes. As cool as chlamydia from a public toilet. Fuck you, assears. I'm gonna get you one, too. Who cares if your birthday is in August.
• I pay attention. I *know* what you want. Probably better than anyone else in your life because when I'm with my girlfriends and one of them is looking through a magazine, I look at what she points to. When she tosses herself down on the couch after a long day and says, "all I want is..." I write it down. When we're walking around and she stops at a window to admire whatever the fuck bullshit is in it, I get a sense of her tastes. With my guy friends, I know what his hobbies are and I ask about what the coolest shit in it is. If he likes pool, tell me about...*shrug* sticks. Oh, lol, not sticks? Cues? I'm a dummy. Tell me about them. Yeah...and do you have a case? A bag? If it's bowling...you get it. Even better, if I'm friends with both halves of a couple, I can tell each one how to get the perfect gift for the other.
• But I can't do it myself because I'm broke.
• ...and broken.

I fucking hate December.

 

Come on over to my antidote to the "holidays" thread in TDS!

I have a birthday four days after xmas as well. I used to look at it this way when I was a kid: If I didn't get what I asked for for xmas, I still had another shot four days later. Considering that I always wanted a donkey, I was doomed to disappointment on both days.

 

Come on over to my antidote to the "holidays" thread in TDS!

I have a birthday four days after xmas as well. I used to look at it this way when I was a kid: If I didn't get what I asked for for xmas, I still had another shot four days later. Considering that I always wanted a donkey, I was doomed to disappointment on both days.

When I was a kid, I didn't mind. My mom was pretty awesome about it. I will never forget the year she gave me a CD for Christmas....knowing full well I didn't have a dang player!! I had to wait until my birthday! Meanie!! But it was a delight knowing what I was going to get. Nowadays, no one is that awesome or creative. I'm headed to your thread now! %)

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