Why am i affected so bad by what people think of me?

[takinabreak]

This is my second year living away at college. My last year of high school i had so many friends and was always busy, always going out and partying and had something to do, someone to hang out with. My first year in college, I lived in the dorms and made a lot of friends. All my high school friends disappeared and do their own thing now and i dont keep in contact with any of them...and they have NO interest in keeping contact with me. So be it. I

I come back to college my second year and all the friends i made my first year left school. They dropped out. They went back home- all far away. My school sucks by the way, almost a third of all freshman drop out. Im one of the one that stayed. I now live in a three bedroom apartment and find it SO FUCKIN hard to make friends and get to know people. I find myself being comforted in the confines of my own apartment and now wanting to go out, just because im so depressed i have no one to go out with anymore.

The Campus sports and activities suck around here, I have no interest in joining a sorority, and the Drexel people just all around suck anyway...theyre just not like me. My roomates have come to see that i stay at the apartment a lot, except when i visit my boyfriend on the weekends, go to class, or go to work. I pretty much dont go anywhere else. They see me as a loser. Theyre always like..."oh, youll be here for a while, wont you?" or "youre here all the time, youre so conservative, youre so boring, you never throw any parties here, etc"

That hurts my feelings and makes my sucky situation even worse. I want to slap them and tell them to fuck off. I get angry at the fact they think im a loser of some sort, because thats not what i was in the past years, AT ALL.

What can i do to change this? What do i say to them? Do i ignore it? How can i connect with people at a place where its virtually impossible and the people are mostly cold? I want my life back!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[yellodolphin]

hey, sorry to hear about ur unpleasent situation but I can relate. Being lonely always makes me depressed. Im in my first year and find it hard to make friends also.
The reason its hard to make friends now is that people probably already have thier established groups by the second year. I know in first year after a lil while it seemed like alot of people had friends and formed social groups. In light of this most people arent really looking to make new friends. I live in an apartment way off campus so that doesnt help much either.
So I apologize that i cant be of more help, i jus know where ur coming from.

 

[WacoWas AnAccident]

Your roommates are stupid. Fuck those bitches!

 

[Banquo]

What can i do to change this? What do i say to them? Do i ignore it? How can i connect with people at a place where its virtually impossible and the people are mostly cold? I want my life back!!!!!!!!!!!

Undergrad can be a rough social experience. But if you take some time to put yourself out there, you can also have a lot of fun. Most of my undergrad friends I met through work. Have you thought about getting a job? What about people who are in your major or study area? Talking with them about class or career can be a good conversation starter. A tough thing to do is learning not to compare undergrad with your old life, like comparing your high school friends with the college friends. Undergrad is a new start, and you gotta push yourself a little to meet new people. Things always get better as you get more seniority. good luck

 

[x2stpsfrmnowhere]

Just start conversations with something easy like "whats your major?" , "where are you from?", "what are your plans after college?" 99.99999% of people love to answer these questions, as it gives them some sense of identity. Then from there ask questions about their answers to those easy questions. IE "your a chemical engineering major, wow that sounds hard, what do you have to do for that?" Plus once you get passed all those Gen Ed classes, and into your major courses you'll start seeing the same people over and over. This makes it virtually impossible to not start some type of friendship with them.

 

[uacvax]

After a year of extremely heavy drinking I can honestly tell you that you're not the loser, they are. Do things you have a strong passion for and try to keep busy that's all I can tell you

 

[tokey]

I rarely went out for my first three years in college. Not until my fourth year did I actually start doing shit. That has a lot to do with turning 21 though. That and being used to where you are. You've got a boyfriend, job and two roommates. You can't be completely alone. Don't worry about it though; give it time. You'll be cool again. I promise.

 

[DJstupid]

I am having sort of the same problem. All of the friends I have I met through work. Also, like it was said before, when you get into your major classes you will see many people over and over again. But I think a lot of people are having your problem. And the bigger problem is no one thinks anyone else has that problem. I think you'll find that the most successful people in college have a restricted social life. College can be so busy and stressful especially if you work and go to school. Count yourself lucky that you at least have a boyfriend so your not totally alone.