*** copied from BL journal ***
This life has been interesting. I've played all the roles one can play with the exception of the most important, the real me.
Fear and the comfort of illusion has prevented me from being who I truly am (whoever that may be). The masks I've previously worn are now thrown away. I've held on to them longer than their shelf life would allow. I've worn these masks, however tattered, however many holes were worn into them, for too long. People started to see through these holes and have seen the real me. I wish I knew who they saw through those masks. Perhaps it would help me understand who I truly am.
I feel naked and vulnerable without the comfort of these masks to hide the person that I am, that I'm afraid to be. I won't go digging in the trash for them and I will not make new ones. I'll just need to let the world see me for who I am afraid to be and use the strength I've gained from self-inflicted pain to handle the results.
Standing emotionally naked in front of the world terrifies me. I can no longer pretend. I can no longer falsify my being. I will not accept the comfort of lies.
I just wish I knew.
Who am I?
This life has been interesting. I've played all the roles one can play with the exception of the most important, the real me.
Fear and the comfort of illusion has prevented me from being who I truly am (whoever that may be). The masks I've previously worn are now thrown away. I've held on to them longer than their shelf life would allow. I've worn these masks, however tattered, however many holes were worn into them, for too long. People started to see through these holes and have seen the real me. I wish I knew who they saw through those masks. Perhaps it would help me understand who I truly am.
I feel naked and vulnerable without the comfort of these masks to hide the person that I am, that I'm afraid to be. I won't go digging in the trash for them and I will not make new ones. I'll just need to let the world see me for who I am afraid to be and use the strength I've gained from self-inflicted pain to handle the results.
Standing emotionally naked in front of the world terrifies me. I can no longer pretend. I can no longer falsify my being. I will not accept the comfort of lies.
I just wish I knew.
Who am I?