@Alex_1991: Thanks. It is a very informative reply.
Did paroxetine (Paxil) give you delusions of grandiosity with insight?
Interesting.
- What dose and route of administration of methamphetanine?
- Does it give you delusions of grandiosity with insight?
- Is this realistically attainable with prescribed doses of ADHD stimulants (say, 50 mg of dextroamphetamine per day)?
I know what you mean. The strict description is “delusion with insight”. You feel as if you were omnipotent, had unlimtied skill, could freely chose your destiny without the constraints of society or similar. At the same time you know that it is not true and this keeps you from getting in trouble. This is what I want. What drug do you recommend? Preferably something that can be obtained legally with a prescription.
There are very few reports of maniac delusions with insight. It seems to be rare. Most people who have maniac delusions let the mania control them and work against them. Thus they claim “mania = bad” as some users above. Probably the few people who can control their maniac delusions and use the for their favor rarely talk about it because of fear of being involuntarily committed. If you enjoy yourself this much, psychiatry with its prejudices sees you as a disease to be eradicated.
Paxil did not give me much insight, I was out of my mind and by the time I was off the Paxil I was back in a heavy alcohol addiction and I’d triggered the bipolar episode and I’d made my choices. It was a heavy summer for me. I don’t regret those experiences really but I don’t want to be back in that spot again. I’ve been back in some spots though, I think that year was the first in my most major series of just being fucked up and completely reckless out of my dome completely.
Amps I’ve used every which way in doses up to 1/2 to a G meth at a time IV at the peak of my last meth addiction. Just a couple weeks ago now I’ve been off the crystal.
The only clarity in that state I find is in moderate amphetamine doses aka not totally spun or drunk too or whatever I’m usually doing. When amphetamines work for me, I’m regulating my dose and level of intoxication to a more therapeutic level, just taking my prescribed it’s a wonder drug. It really makes me feel well and gives me some clarity that I don’t really have a way of tapping into otherwise.
That being said, it’s a fine line to walk and I’ve been way out of control for some time. It’s good when it’s good, and the rest of the time it’s more building the delusion and more psychotic states of mind than anything.
It’s really world building in a really negative way where it’s bound actually affect your character in a negative way because your thoughts do kind of become your reality, and if they’re all fucked up from being in an offstate for too long that’s no longer really an off state, it’s just always on. Always on the verge in psychosis if not in it, always on the precipice of absolute disaster or ruin to the deepest level. People who do meth wind up fucked up, totally delusional and demoralized in so many ways.
I would not recommend trying to achieve from any recreational standpoint as in not discussed thoroughly with your doctor... a medicinal level of relief or actual clarity from it, any amphetamines, to someone who’s prone to addiction or already hooked on the shit especially. I am still trying to manage it, but it’s precarious.
Im eally just going for harm reduction more than anything now (meaning there’s still harm). I get one weeks worth at a time and do urinalysis for meth to get my vyvanse now. It lasts 2-3 days. That’s the best I’ve managed this whole year after a long run of pure addiction hell and I’m into some alcohol and pot and whatever comes my way too.. been hooked into meth since 3 years ago and first tried it, even abused at times much farther back then that.
It’s amazing when a substance works and you can get into a positive frame of mind that feels good and in control, mind expanding, but it’s really the exception I think to what most people can manage with these powerful substances.
Amps are really, not worth the investment if you’re just kind of soul seeking like this and trying to find these “manic delusions with insight”. I need to press here that even with insight it’s still delusion and you’re creating a fantasy world you can’t possibly make into something totally concrete in a positive or healthy way because it’s like all fiction, unattainable except in passing and remote from who and what you really are. It’s a big disappointment and honestly my memory is so shot now most of the great thoughts I’ve ever had on it just passed me by while the nightmare remained.
with amps it’s at the cost of your brains natural ability to feel well and connected. It a warm blanket at the cost of the heating in your house and then the fat in your body, the world around and inside you is no longer regulated properly. Then the blanket gets really old and worn out really fast, there’s essentially nothing left but this inner death, hallow state.
All the ego building and spiritual degradation makes a fine mix for the opposite of what was intended to begin with; trying to achieve insight and wellness, grandeur, hypomania, whatever makes the world go by.
many do use amps to a good degree and people do get things under control, but here’s the straight man.. if you wind up in addiction the relapse rate is 88% with or without treatment. There’s no good earworm to the tune of being most likely fucked and in and out of your mind forever, not when its about you and you hear own psyche screaming that cacophony saying you're just fucked.