I just noticed it's been over 10 years ago since i signed up to Bluelight.
That'd make it about 10 years ago since my first Ecstasy experience, which is what lead me to bluelight, as i was researching and browsing the internet about MDMA.
i was about 19 at the time. My friend who was a few years older than me mentioned to me one day that he had taken Ecstasy, and how much he loved it.
He didn't stop talking about it for weeks. He asked me to do it with him. At first i wasn't really into the idea. Growing up my parents were always pretty strict about drugs, etc etc. Drinking alochol was okay, but drugs were a big no no.
Anyway, the more my friend talked about it, the more my inquisitive mind wanted to know more. So i started asking him questions about it, etc etc. i also spent countless hours on the internet reading about it. Many of those hours were on this very site, the Ecstasy Discussion forum.
I'm glad i took the time to read and research about it a lot. It was thanks to websites like bluelight that helped educate me. I had a lot of respect for the drug and never took it consecutive nights or weekends. Always had 4 weeks break minimum in between rolls... i use to count down the weekends 'till my next roll. it was good having that discipline not taking it every weekend, it made me appreciate it a lot more when i did take it. As time went on those 4 weeks became 5 weeks, and so on...
I'm so glad i experienced MDMA. what i love most about it is how it really just opens you up. brings even the most reserved person to life. I have always been quite a reserved person socially. kinda keep to myself, don't really say much. Very shy at times especially talking to beautiful women. but when i'm on MDMA, i'm able to just let go and walk over all those social walls i normally have. Gives me the confidence i otherwise don't have, and just allows me to be me. No bullshit. and it's genuine too... unlike alcohol where there's times when you're intoxicated you say and do things you otherwise just wouldn't do. but with MDMA, i have been able to meet and talk to people i otherwise wouldn't have. and the best thing is that many of those people i have became friends with and talked to long after the MDMA has worn off. that's the difference between alcohol and MDMA, for me anyway.
the one thing i hate about MDMA is the stigma that comes with it. a lot of people look down on MDMA because it's just another one of those "illicit" bad drugs. the funny thing for me when i started taking MDMA was that the majority of my friends and my major group of friends, none of them took it. they were all big drinkers, and had no problem in writing themselves off on alcohol, but any drug such as Ecstasy was kind of looked down upon.
i guess they just didn't understand, but at the same time i can't blame them for that - i once had a similar outlook on drugs in general before i took the time to read and research into things. i guess we've all been guilty of being ignorant about something. with all the bullshit and propaganda you hear and read about, combined with the scare tactics many parents use on their own children, it's no wonder why drugs such as MDMA have such a bad rep.
but anyway.. most of them knew that i was on MDMA.. while some didn't even notice.
MDMA has helped me recognise the person i want to be. the person i enjoy being. it's helped me ask questions of myself -- why am i such a reserved person normally, and why do i generally lack so much confidence? my self esteem is a problem, and something i need to work on. MDMA has given me perspective, and helped me help myself in certain ways i probably wouldn't have realised otherwise.
anyway, MDMA is not the be all and end all of life. it's just one of the many many experiences life has to offer. it won't solve your problems, or make you a better person. but like any experience in life, you'll get to take away something from it. what you take away is up to you. for some people MDMA is just a hell of a good time, while for others it's a tool they use to self reflect and gain perspective they otherwise wouldn't have had.
have fun. be safe, and always make sure you use the majority of your energy on appreciating the things you DO have, and not worrying or thinking about the shit you DON'T have.
pz.
That'd make it about 10 years ago since my first Ecstasy experience, which is what lead me to bluelight, as i was researching and browsing the internet about MDMA.
i was about 19 at the time. My friend who was a few years older than me mentioned to me one day that he had taken Ecstasy, and how much he loved it.
He didn't stop talking about it for weeks. He asked me to do it with him. At first i wasn't really into the idea. Growing up my parents were always pretty strict about drugs, etc etc. Drinking alochol was okay, but drugs were a big no no.
Anyway, the more my friend talked about it, the more my inquisitive mind wanted to know more. So i started asking him questions about it, etc etc. i also spent countless hours on the internet reading about it. Many of those hours were on this very site, the Ecstasy Discussion forum.
I'm glad i took the time to read and research about it a lot. It was thanks to websites like bluelight that helped educate me. I had a lot of respect for the drug and never took it consecutive nights or weekends. Always had 4 weeks break minimum in between rolls... i use to count down the weekends 'till my next roll. it was good having that discipline not taking it every weekend, it made me appreciate it a lot more when i did take it. As time went on those 4 weeks became 5 weeks, and so on...
I'm so glad i experienced MDMA. what i love most about it is how it really just opens you up. brings even the most reserved person to life. I have always been quite a reserved person socially. kinda keep to myself, don't really say much. Very shy at times especially talking to beautiful women. but when i'm on MDMA, i'm able to just let go and walk over all those social walls i normally have. Gives me the confidence i otherwise don't have, and just allows me to be me. No bullshit. and it's genuine too... unlike alcohol where there's times when you're intoxicated you say and do things you otherwise just wouldn't do. but with MDMA, i have been able to meet and talk to people i otherwise wouldn't have. and the best thing is that many of those people i have became friends with and talked to long after the MDMA has worn off. that's the difference between alcohol and MDMA, for me anyway.
the one thing i hate about MDMA is the stigma that comes with it. a lot of people look down on MDMA because it's just another one of those "illicit" bad drugs. the funny thing for me when i started taking MDMA was that the majority of my friends and my major group of friends, none of them took it. they were all big drinkers, and had no problem in writing themselves off on alcohol, but any drug such as Ecstasy was kind of looked down upon.
i guess they just didn't understand, but at the same time i can't blame them for that - i once had a similar outlook on drugs in general before i took the time to read and research into things. i guess we've all been guilty of being ignorant about something. with all the bullshit and propaganda you hear and read about, combined with the scare tactics many parents use on their own children, it's no wonder why drugs such as MDMA have such a bad rep.
but anyway.. most of them knew that i was on MDMA.. while some didn't even notice.
MDMA has helped me recognise the person i want to be. the person i enjoy being. it's helped me ask questions of myself -- why am i such a reserved person normally, and why do i generally lack so much confidence? my self esteem is a problem, and something i need to work on. MDMA has given me perspective, and helped me help myself in certain ways i probably wouldn't have realised otherwise.
anyway, MDMA is not the be all and end all of life. it's just one of the many many experiences life has to offer. it won't solve your problems, or make you a better person. but like any experience in life, you'll get to take away something from it. what you take away is up to you. for some people MDMA is just a hell of a good time, while for others it's a tool they use to self reflect and gain perspective they otherwise wouldn't have had.
have fun. be safe, and always make sure you use the majority of your energy on appreciating the things you DO have, and not worrying or thinking about the shit you DON'T have.
pz.
