• Psychedelic Drugs Welcome Guest
    View threads about
    Posting RulesBluelight Rules
    PD's Best Threads Index
    Social ThreadSupport Bluelight
    Psychedelic Beginner's FAQ

When I look in the mirror i see myself,but I dont feel myself there, is it normal?

B

boxkittycat

Greenlighter
Joined
Jun 2, 2016
Messages
9
After psychedelic use, when i look into the mirror, I see myself, but i dont feel like im there, i feel numb...No anxiety no nothing, i know im real, up until I see my reflection, its like im looking at a whole other person who just isnt me...at all.
 
It's the realization that youre a spirit, and your reflection is but a vessel. Typical psychedelic thought process.



- SS373dOH Soul
 
That seems semi-common for some people, it happens with a variety of different drugs. It's called dissociation and it happens to sober people too, the reasons ranging from increased stress to childhood abuse or trauma. What you're describing sounds like depersonalization, which is just a specific type of dissociation where you feel like you might not be real or you are looking at yourself from a different point of view, or a bunch of other weird shit. It's got other symptoms as well, and you may be experiencing them but not considering them related to the "im not real" thing. I get that feeling sometimes while on drugs and often times it's when im really stressed and depressed. I'll be chillin and all of the sudden everything is foggy and im not real and nothing is real and sometimes it can be pretty fuckin scary. It is interesting though probably worth looking into.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dissociation_(psychology) This is a good start, and it has depersonalization info.
 
boxkittycat said:
After psychedelic use, when i look into the mirror, I see myself, but i dont feel like im there, i feel numb...No anxiety no nothing, i know im real, up until I see my reflection, its like im looking at a whole other person who just isnt me...at all.
Click to expand...

I know this feeling too well.

A lot of it has to do with not having a healthy ego in place and, in addition, awareness of the non existence of YOUR ego but the existence of a single consciousness.

Psychadelics showed you the whole... now, is it time to work on the pieces?

It's up to you.
 
Looking in the mirror used to make me feel strange too sometimes. It's good to be with a friend- we could look at each other and say "you look weird" and laugh. That's part of the fun I remember. Tripping by yourself can make you overthink stuff. :) Moving to Psychedelic Drugs
 
If it bothers you enough then it would seem like what is called depersonalization (related to derealization), but if you instead take it as something revealing how complex or subjective or relative things like 'reality' and 'self' are you can try to integrate it as an experience and expanded awareness.

Maybe read up a bit about it, try to put it in perspective and see if it helps. It doesn't matter whether it's normal (yes its probably not that uncommon) IMO, but whether it bothers you and why. Hopefully it is not bothersome but just 'different' and interesting.
 
Dissociative. Kinda like dissociative highs but without the drugs as a mental health disorder Minor or major I kno someone who said they feel that way
 
T. Calderone said:
Looking in the mirror used to make me feel strange too sometimes. It's good to be with a friend- we could look at each other and say "you look weird" and laugh. That's part of the fun I remember. Tripping by yourself can make you overthink stuff. :) Moving to Psychedelic Drugs
Click to expand...

:)

this
 
^ Except that this is about after the trip... surely I don't like to experience all possible psychedelic effects after trips as much as I like them during..

Seems like a mental health thread to me, imo

As long as this is not too bothersome and remains benign its good to talk about it and try to just put it in perspective and focus on self reintegration... but if it is really a part of a problem probably good to get some psych help.
 
Solipsis said:
^ Except that this is about after the trip... surely I don't like to experience all possible psychedelic effects after trips as much as I like them during..

Seems like a mental health thread to me, imo

As long as this is not too bothersome and remains benign its good to talk about it and try to just put it in perspective and focus on self reintegration... but if it is really a part of a problem probably good to get some psych help.
Click to expand...

+1

I've felt strange for a while after psychedelic use, time is needed to integrate the experience too and understand what it is you have experienced. I've felt at one with the universe when tripping well actually I was the universe but on sobering up I was a disconnected meat bag stumbling through life. Had to take a look at myself after that!

It can be a horrible feeling, if you can talk to someone maybe read a bit of philosophy, eat, exercise and rest well and if things start to get worse maybe consider reaching out for help.
 
Solipsis said:
^ Except that this is about after the trip... surely I don't like to experience all possible psychedelic effects after trips as much as I like them during..

Seems like a mental health thread to me, imo

As long as this is not too bothersome and remains benign its good to talk about it and try to just put it in perspective and focus on self reintegration... but if it is really a part of a problem probably good to get some psych help.
Click to expand...

Except, there is no AFTER the trip, there is only the trip.
 
Let me clarify.

It can certainly be difficult. I know this all too well. Eventually you will be incentivized to seek filters in order to integrate etc more smoothly into day to day life.

This may be something as simple (or difficult) as acceptance of the situation, or placing yourself in comfortable situations, such as referenced above.

If you mean that total EMPTINESS, and not so much a mental filter, you may be dealing with a different beast. I've felt this as well. The best thing I can say is to try to seek the root of it.

That might be a starting point.

Good luck.... :)
 
boxkittycat said:
After psychedelic use, when i look into the mirror, I see myself, but i dont feel like im there, i feel numb...No anxiety no nothing, i know im real, up until I see my reflection, its like im looking at a whole other person who just isnt me...at all.
Click to expand...
Maybe you just haven't found yourself yet? You know you're there you just don't know who you are. There was a time where I felt I didn't know who I was, hell I still don't. I'm still a work in progress as you can see. Explore yourself, your mind, your interest old and new, and see where you go from there.

Another thing I'd like to add well if you look into the mirror and see a whole another person that you don't recognize but is clearly you why not have some fun with that? Be that other person for a day or two and see what happens. You never know you might enjoy being that person. I met my ego on this one trip I didn't really like that person but I didn't try to shut him out I embraced him and we've been turning the world upside down since then haa
 
I noticed that most of the time weirdness of anything that one might be perceiving/being aware of is strongly related to feeling fear and seeing the phenomenon as unknown/weird, whatever is weird is only weird because it is not common/known to you at the moment, being in a situation in which you can't wrap your mind around everything you experience can be frightening. A few years ago I came to a conclusion that all the religion stuff, gods, eternal life as presented in so called holy books is a scam, it took me a while to fully integrate with this "knowledge" or awareness of that, with this came decreased fear of death, you know, on one hand it is perfectly normal to die at some point in your life as everybody do. So how is this anything unknown/weird (as soon as you realize there is no logic reason to believe you continue to live after you die)? So I began to feel comfortable with the thought that I will die one day and my consciousness and my memory will vanish. On the other hand there is something weirdly frightening about dying when you know nobody cares about you, when you're not the most important person for anyone, at the same time dying doesn't seem as frightening, even if you're physically alone at the very moment of your death, once you've been loved. What I mean by this is that religion as a way of manipulation deals with some basic needs of every being and plays with them to make an individual submissive to the "system" (= whatever is governing the way our every day life as in culture, habits, manners, what is seen as normal and not normal by a society etc., with the way not being natural if only every individual wasn't influenced by the system). Depersonalization and derealization, not provoked by dissociatives or psychedelics, are manifestations of negating the reality you find yourself in, of not wanting it to be like it really is. I've experienced deep dissociative episode after quitting benzodiazepines and it was indeed frightening, one thing is the cause was biochemical (but how? what is the mechanism?), the other thing when I stopped taking them, I suddenly started perceiving and feeling everything much stronger, all the stuff that I managed to deny and hide deep inside myself years ago started popping out and it was way too stressful to take at once, hence dissociation from the present moment, from the reality I found myself in.

Weird stuff this is and I continue experiencing it even though it's not as intense, it's as if I was about to find about something I need to know to survive, but don't want to know to avoid stress.
 
Last edited:
T. Calderone said:
Looking in the mirror used to make me feel strange too sometimes. It's good to be with a friend- we could look at each other and say "you look weird" and laugh. That's part of the fun I remember. Tripping by yourself can make you overthink stuff. :) Moving to Psychedelic Drugs
Click to expand...

Ironic...Weed used to do that to me all the time hence "Mild psychedelic". It doesn't help when weed makes me think more.
 
I'll give you a short answer.

This is dissociation. Dissociative Psychadelics such as PCP, Ketamine, DXM, etc will cause this everytime. It may last a couple days even after you're done tripping. This may even happen with strong Psychadelics as with almost every drug theres a point where a lot of it can cause dissociation, and it could last a bit after you're done tripping.

So, in your case if it doesn't go away in a week or so then I'd start looking into depersonalization disorder and what you can do to help yourself out. This disorder can be brought on by many things too such as just turning from a person against drugs to a drug addict. Some people have actually used Psychadelics such as LSD to find themselves, which actually sort of cured their disorder. But the opposite could very much happen like in your case. I'd wait a week or two before doing a drug again to see if it goes away. If not then defintley research what you can do to help yourself out, maybe even go see a therapist or doctor.

I hope for the best.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top