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Whats the funniest thing you've ever seen someone on drugs do?

haha whenever we drink my boy always rips these rank ass malt liquor farts in peoples faces who ass out early.
 
This might not be a funny story to anyone who wasn't there.... but anywhoo

Group of about 8 of my friends and I all tripping on various substances, stoned, drunk, etc... we were at a festival, freezing our asses of, tried to make a huge fire out of NOTHING haha there was no wood to be had. it was raining also. So 8 of us basically scrambling around rubbing random branches together, lighting things on fire, rearranging what little scrap wood and boxes we could find over and over and over again, people blowing on the sparks.... hahahaha this went on for like an hour or so. it looked so ridiculous and sad. it was awful.

finally one of our group ran to another person's fire, grabbed a burning log, brought it over to our pathetic excuse for a fire, and VOILA! instant heat! lol.
 
Ripped on shrooms, riding the transit with my friend shouting and dancing out the soundtrack to RENT... weird stares are an understatement
 
God theres so many to choose from

I don't think anyone wants to hear about me chasing and eventually getting chased by deer on Salvia, or jumping off a bridge into water in December; Stoned as hell. So i'm going to tell you a story that sounds like a mix between the 6th Sense and some generic drug movie, this is the scariest/eeriest thing i think i've ever experienced...

I was with some of my friends, and we had been smoking my friend's, lets call him J's Meth all day. No one really likes J we just hang around him because he's a dealer and always gives us drugs because he seems to be really lonely. J had severely tweaking for a couple days: needless to say we were all somewhat worried about him that day.
At around 8 or so went back to J's house and to my surprise ;) he had amassed an abundance of drugs in the short period of time since i last went to his house. Everyone dropped a couple hits of acid, and had a fairly regular trip, but whenever i looked over i would see him in the corner; doing something extremely compulsive. I couldn't tell what exactly, but it didn't worry anyone that much until the next day. at around 2 everyone, or so i thought, downed some bars to crash. It worked without fail and we were all out for the night. Except as i would later find out J would spend his night sitting in that same corner, only leaving to fuel his temporary state of madness by doing more meth and acid.
When I woke up: still feeling the after affects of the Acid and Xanax I contemplated taking the last bit of my meth to combat the sluggishness of the afforementioned xanax. Right as I was pulling out my bag I noticed there was paper scattered all over the floor of the corner where J was and stuffed the bag back into my pocket. Because I was worried about him, and realized that for him to be tempted to do more drugs was probably the worst thing in the world. I walked up to him and tried to talk to him and see what the pictures were. He replied immediately with, "NO! DON'T LOOK AT THAT! ...it's not time." I didn't really think that much about what he said.
I tried to leave a couple hours later. and when I made it to the door I saw J leave his corner for the first time all night, well now it was day. I asked him what he wanted and he just stood there and stared for about 5 seconds before handing me the piece of paper and saying, "look at this," as if it was a new object to me. It just had the number 34 written probably 100 times on it in a similar style to that of the the walls in The Shining. I took it with an uneasy feeling and left without saying a word.
On the walk home about halfway there i noticed a tall thin man with a green jersey on; I think it was a Celtics jersey, and guess what... it was number Thirty-Fucking-Four! That was the scaredest, and most freaked out that i had been in a long time... at least until I had passed him by a foot or two.
"Hey, gimme your fucking money!" he said. I could feel a gun pressing below my ribs and my instinctive to run quickly died. I slowly got my wallet out of my pocket trying not to look as if i was making a quick grab for a gun. When I opened it I knew I was fucked, because i was staring at an empty wallet. I then remembered the bag of meth J had given me in my pocket: I had about half a gram left. I offered it to him while explaining that I had no money. I tried not to sound scared out of my mind but I think i failed at it. Because when he snatched it I bolted off and I don't think i stopped until I made it back to my house.
I can't stop thinking about that drawing, and how it not only should've warned me, but also in a less obvious way saved my life... Because if J hadn't spent all night drawing I wouldn't have been so inclined to not do the rest of my meth, and would've been shot for sure...

christ that was long
 
^^ Reminds me of that Jim Carrey movie, the number 23!
 
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God theres so many to choose from

I don't think anyone wants to hear about me chasing and eventually getting chased by deer on Salvia, or jumping off a bridge into water in December; Stoned as hell. So i'm going to tell you a story that sounds like a mix between the 6th Sense and some generic drug movie, this is the scariest/eeriest thing i think i've ever experienced...

I was with some of my friends, and we had been smoking my friend's, lets call him J's Meth all day. No one really likes J we just hang around him because he's a dealer and always gives us drugs because he seems to be really lonely. J had severely tweaking for a couple days: needless to say we were all somewhat worried about him that day.
At around 8 or so went back to J's house and to my surprise ;) he had amassed an abundance of drugs in the short period of time since i last went to his house. Everyone dropped a couple hits of acid, and had a fairly regular trip, but whenever i looked over i would see him in the corner; doing something extremely compulsive. I couldn't tell what exactly, but it didn't worry anyone that much until the next day. at around 2 everyone, or so i thought, downed some bars to crash. It worked without fail and we were all out for the night. Except as i would later find out J would spend his night sitting in that same corner, only leaving to fuel his temporary state of madness by doing more meth and acid.
When I woke up: still feeling the after affects of the Acid and Xanax I contemplated taking the last bit of my meth to combat the sluggishness of the afforementioned xanax. Right as I was pulling out my bag I noticed there was paper scattered all over the floor of the corner where J was and stuffed the bag back into my pocket. Because I was worried about him, and realized that for him to be tempted to do more drugs was probably the worst thing in the world. I walked up to him and tried to talk to him and see what the pictures were. He replied immediately with, "NO! DON'T LOOK AT THAT! ...it's not time." I didn't really think that much about what he said.
I tried to leave a couple hours later. and when I made it to the door I saw J leave his corner for the first time all night, well now it was day. I asked him what he wanted and he just stood there and stared for about 5 seconds before handing me the piece of paper and saying, "look at this," as if it was a new object to me. It just had the number 34 written probably 100 times on it in a similar style to that of the the walls in The Shining. I took it with an uneasy feeling and left without saying a word.
On the walk home about halfway there i noticed a tall thin man with a green jersey on; I think it was a Celtics jersey, and guess what... it was number Thirty-Fucking-Four! That was the scaredest, and most freaked out that i had been in a long time... at least until I had passed him by a foot or two.
"Hey, gimme your fucking money!" he said. I could feel a gun pressing below my ribs and my instinctive to run quickly died. I slowly got my wallet out of my pocket trying not to look as if i was making a quick grab for a gun. When I opened it I knew I was fucked, because i was staring at an empty wallet. I then remembered the bag of meth J had given me in my pocket: I had about half a gram left. I offered it to him while explaining that I had no money. I tried not to sound scared out of my mind but I think i failed at it. Because when he snatched it I bolted off and I don't think i stopped until I made it back to my house.
I can't stop thinking about that drawing, and how it not only should've warned me, but also in a less obvious way saved my life... Because if J hadn't spent all night drawing I wouldn't have been so inclined to not do the rest of my meth, and would've been shot for sure...

christ that was long


Wow, thats not a funny story but I can see something like that easily pushing me over the edge into insanity after a night of meth and shrooms.
 
I wasn't actually present for this disgusting feat, but my buddy insists that it happened. This kid Phil that we knew a while ago for absolutely no reason whatsoever declared that he would smoke a stinkbug out of a bong.

I dunno if any of you guys are familiar with these things, but they are like nickel sized beetles that secrete an absolutely disgusting scent when you bother them.

So he throws a dead one in a bong and smokes the fucking thing. Then proceeds to cough violently and vomit afterwards. Truly disgusting, but I laughed my ass off when I heard that story.
 
^^^^
Oh yeah and I don't know how much drugs he was on, but knowing Phil it was safe to assume that he was stoned.
 
someone i know walked down the high street with his trousers round his ankles at midday after dropping 8 pills at once
 
At a festival this summer, my friend and I were tripping acid at around three in the morning, sitting in chairs outside our tent. I started feeling my teeth with my tongue and made a passing comment that they felt kinda fuzzy (from living the nasty festie life for the past couple days) and my friend absolutely bugged. He got up, stormed into the tent, got his toothbrush, toothpaste, and a bottle of water, proceeded to brush his teeth, then threw his toothbrush on the ground and yelled, "If ANYONE else has fuzzy teeth and needs to brush them, my toothbrush is RIGHT THERE. RIGHT THERE!"

Also, the next day at that festival, another friend of mine somehow found his way to our camp at around 2 in the afternoon and begged us for food. He was tripping pretty hard and we offered him goldfish and cookies but then he spied a breakfast burrito I'd gotten that morning and only eaten half of...and now another of my friend had it impaled on a tent stake and was waving it around:
"What is that?"
"A breakfast burrito.."
"When did you get it?"
"...Like 10 this morning.."
"Oh ok, it's still good, can I have it?"

And he takes it and walks off munching on this nasty ass cold burrito.

I'm sure I have funnier stories but I can't really remember right now
 
A friend of mine slams a whole 5th of rum then a 20 sack of shrooms, he gets really fucked up and passes out (we were on a beach). He proceeds to climb on these rocks were he then slips off and falls head first into a rock eight feet below. I looked down and was like "OH SHIT ARE YOU OKAY?!" he replies "my head hurts"
 
if he fell head first onto a rock eight feet below wouldnt he be dead?
 
A friend of mine slams a whole 5th of rum then a 20 sack of shrooms, he gets really fucked up and passes out (we were on a beach). He proceeds to climb on these rocks were he then slips off and falls head first into a rock eight feet below. I looked down and was like "OH SHIT ARE YOU OKAY?!" he replies "my head hurts"

And im guessing you took him to the hospital right after
RIIIGHTT??

im surprised he didnt die!

I just have one question: why would you let someone whos trippin/drinkin to climb rocks?!
 
IDK if this is funny to you guys, but after like a full 24 hours of rolling, I went to score more pills from the literal hood at 6 am with my guy friend and I was still in such lovey dovey mode that I bought the all the boys slinging on the block munchkin donuts from Dunkin.

I actually asked the head guy to come out to breakfast with me, but he said he had to work. Apparently (and I guess I missed this somehow) he did ask if my friend was my BF, cause if not he was willing to take some time out to sleep with me. My friend just said that I was his gf though.
 
I was rolling balls one night years ago and we were waiting outside this girl's apartment for her to let us in or something. I happened to see this HUUUGE stink bug just chilling down on the ground. I thought it was so fascinating that I had to stick my finger under the bug, and kind of lift it up.

Well, it being a stink bug, guess what that little fucker did? He didn't try to run, oh no; he just excreted a clear looking liquid from his/her rear, almost like taking a piss. Now what did my dumbass do? Put my finger right under my nose and gave a big whiff!!

I immediately starting throwing up so hard, it wasn't even funny. It was almost instanataneous. My friends that were there got a big kick out of that.
 
i remember one time i went over to my friends house mid day baked outta my mind. by this point they had dropped a couple tabs of acid and were peaking. So im downstairs chillin out on the couch when i just hear thumping upstairs heading down towards me.

Lo and behold my friend comes thundering down the stairs with a whole bread loaf in his hand and procliams "BREAD IT ON!!!" and thrusts his arm into it and starts flailing it around in the air. he wore that loaf on his arm for quite some time. he seemed pretty excited so i couldnt help but laugh my ass off fuck lol
 
I was rolling balls one night years ago and we were waiting outside this girl's apartment for her to let us in or something. I happened to see this HUUUGE stink bug just chilling down on the ground. I thought it was so fascinating that I had to stick my finger under the bug, and kind of lift it up.

Well, it being a stink bug, guess what that little fucker did? He didn't try to run, oh no; he just excreted a clear looking liquid from his/her rear, almost like taking a piss. Now what did my dumbass do? Put my finger right under my nose and gave a big whiff!!

I immediately starting throwing up so hard, it wasn't even funny. It was almost instanataneous. My friends that were there got a big kick out of that.

I wasn't actually present for this disgusting feat, but my buddy insists that it happened. This kid Phil that we knew a while ago for absolutely no reason whatsoever declared that he would smoke a stinkbug out of a bong.

I dunno if any of you guys are familiar with these things, but they are like nickel sized beetles that secrete an absolutely disgusting scent when you bother them.

So he throws a dead one in a bong and smokes the fucking thing. Then proceeds to cough violently and vomit afterwards. Truly disgusting, but I laughed my ass off when I heard that story.


What is with you people and stink bugs? LOL
 
When I was young and only smoked weed (a long long time ago), this one dude we all knew was totally fucked up in the head... I saw him spray gold spraypaint on his tongue for like 30 seconds, saw him eat a McDonalds cheeseburger that was hanging on a nail in my buddy's attic for at least 6 months, all moldy and shit, it was nasty... this dude would do all kinds of crazy shit, but those are the only 2 I can think of right now... nasty mofo...
 
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