SirTophamHat
Bluelighter
Just the thread I was looking for.
Man, so I have that ANX/DEP complex, and regardless of when that popped up, I'm fairly sure I have PTSD too now, or a [more mild?] related condition.
NSFW for length/no one wants to read my brain drool. Man that felt good to type out, though. Screw PTSD.
Man, so I have that ANX/DEP complex, and regardless of when that popped up, I'm fairly sure I have PTSD too now, or a [more mild?] related condition.
NSFW:
In winter 09 Friend A asks me if I want to room with Friends A, B, and C from summer 09-spring 10. I say sure. I am great friends with A & B and if they are all right with C he can't be a bad guy, right? Friend D tries to tell me that Friend C is psychopathic but I shrug it off because Friend D has troubles with many people. I made the decision to room with these fellows when drunk which was OBVIOUSLY NOT GOOD. I am a horribly impulsive person at times. Which means almost all the time.
So we move into a place, things are going well for a little while, like a few weeks maybe. We build a large table together, pooling our funds. Friend C decides he will graffiti N I G G E R on the table (it's wooden) with permanent marker one night. Remember, this is a table at the front of our flat, which we all paid for and built together. Over the course of the next couple months, Friend C exposes himself as incredibly angry, manic, and blameful. Of course he is also a bigot, and continues to tag things like "Fuck fags"on our table. Friends A & B have lived with Friend C before, concede that "he has anger problems," but don't believe it is a big deal like I do. I snap one night and spray paint the entire table black out of frustration/aggravation/embarrassment of what it represents and who I associate with. Friend C, drunk as is par for his course, comes along later that evening and goes "I'm glad someone blacked out the N I G G E Rs, it shows that we don't stand for those people in our house."
I moved out the next day, and Friend A & B cannot understand why. The rest of the semester I cannot sleep without alcohol or another kind of sedative, have nightmares about this idiot, etc. I am living with my parents now and just threw about 7,000 USD down the toilet because as hard as I may try, no one wants to sublet my room--who would? I consider moving back in over the holiday break, but return to find holes punched into my vacant room by Friend C and decide I don't want to deal with this kid's bullshit facade any more. I stay at home, commute to school for the rest of the year, until graduation. It really really sucked having to move out of my awesome flat because of this one dickhole.
Fast forward to last week, I'm having a shit time at work and at home, anxiety up the wazoo. Friend C crashed a party I was at over the weekend that I thought was going to be a wicked fun bash before he showed up drunk and all "Hey man, haven't seen you in a while dude what's up?!" Hahaha.
I saw him again a few days later at a jam packet grocery market with his girlfriend and couldn't resist yelling "Hey it's ____ the racist, what's up!!!" He starts to respond and I just walk away. We're in the most liberal store in our liberal state and he can endure all the stares himself. Things are never that cut and dry of course, and he winds up checking out next to me. Granted, the market is pretty much standing room only but that doesn't stop him from threatening to kill me as he walks past me out the door. I simply responded "See ya, racist!"
Now I have an old friend in my neighborhood who is somewhat bigoted himself, in the same circle of friends as this psycho. My neighborhood friend has called me up this past weekend saying "____ wants to know where you are, so he can kick your ass." Now I am not afraid of this kid, but all I want to do is end his tenure in my city. He is really crazy enough to do something like pull a knife on me and although I would take the hit if it meant getting him shipped out, I'd rather not take the chance.
EDIT: Just to clarify, I realize it is incredibly foolish to antagonize unstable people with mood problems. I never claimed to be bright.
So we move into a place, things are going well for a little while, like a few weeks maybe. We build a large table together, pooling our funds. Friend C decides he will graffiti N I G G E R on the table (it's wooden) with permanent marker one night. Remember, this is a table at the front of our flat, which we all paid for and built together. Over the course of the next couple months, Friend C exposes himself as incredibly angry, manic, and blameful. Of course he is also a bigot, and continues to tag things like "Fuck fags"on our table. Friends A & B have lived with Friend C before, concede that "he has anger problems," but don't believe it is a big deal like I do. I snap one night and spray paint the entire table black out of frustration/aggravation/embarrassment of what it represents and who I associate with. Friend C, drunk as is par for his course, comes along later that evening and goes "I'm glad someone blacked out the N I G G E Rs, it shows that we don't stand for those people in our house."
I moved out the next day, and Friend A & B cannot understand why. The rest of the semester I cannot sleep without alcohol or another kind of sedative, have nightmares about this idiot, etc. I am living with my parents now and just threw about 7,000 USD down the toilet because as hard as I may try, no one wants to sublet my room--who would? I consider moving back in over the holiday break, but return to find holes punched into my vacant room by Friend C and decide I don't want to deal with this kid's bullshit facade any more. I stay at home, commute to school for the rest of the year, until graduation. It really really sucked having to move out of my awesome flat because of this one dickhole.
Fast forward to last week, I'm having a shit time at work and at home, anxiety up the wazoo. Friend C crashed a party I was at over the weekend that I thought was going to be a wicked fun bash before he showed up drunk and all "Hey man, haven't seen you in a while dude what's up?!" Hahaha.
I saw him again a few days later at a jam packet grocery market with his girlfriend and couldn't resist yelling "Hey it's ____ the racist, what's up!!!" He starts to respond and I just walk away. We're in the most liberal store in our liberal state and he can endure all the stares himself. Things are never that cut and dry of course, and he winds up checking out next to me. Granted, the market is pretty much standing room only but that doesn't stop him from threatening to kill me as he walks past me out the door. I simply responded "See ya, racist!"
Now I have an old friend in my neighborhood who is somewhat bigoted himself, in the same circle of friends as this psycho. My neighborhood friend has called me up this past weekend saying "____ wants to know where you are, so he can kick your ass." Now I am not afraid of this kid, but all I want to do is end his tenure in my city. He is really crazy enough to do something like pull a knife on me and although I would take the hit if it meant getting him shipped out, I'd rather not take the chance.
EDIT: Just to clarify, I realize it is incredibly foolish to antagonize unstable people with mood problems. I never claimed to be bright.
NSFW for length/no one wants to read my brain drool. Man that felt good to type out, though. Screw PTSD.
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omg im gonna blow down the other half that i was saving but i guess ill hjae to buy another one fuck
