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What was your morning fix? v. All part of a balanced breakfast

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That sucks^^^
About to shoot my last two bags, so I'm holed up in my bathroom. Then I'll make a pot of my famous diesel strength coffee.
Have a good day! :D

Lol he probably hates you right now once you said you're gonna shoot those bags. My breakfast is a cup of coffee with about 90mg or morphine, should give me a little buzz. And in a couple hours I'll walk to the local liquor store a couple blocks away and get me a couple Budweiser chelata's (excellent beer for my area) I live in Arizona and should be between 105-110 today
 
A big fat line of sobriety with a side of wds uggghhhhhh! And waking up? Hell I've only slept an hour in the past two days and it wasn't tonight. ☹️ Not my choice just my circumstances this week and next. I'm in famine mode on a crash diet I guess you could say.

I know that feel. :\ I've spent too much time in w/d these past few months. This is actually the first time in a long time I've been able to limit my oxy use. I might actually only spend a few days in w/d this entire month! Or even none at all if I manage to keep this up. I have a lot of oxy left and so far I've been using them 'wisely'. Getting loprazolam scripted is one of the best decisions I've made in a while. I can get off on so much less oxy when I combine the two. I haven't been compulsively redosing like I usually do either.

I'm scripted 240mg a day though, that'd be more than plenty for most people... Well, not for me. But this time I've been able to stick to my dose for a whole week already! Usually I can't stick to my dose for even a single day...

I'm just really, really sick (pun intended) of spending half my days in withdrawal.

Anyway, I wish you well and I hope you get better soon. Be it via relapsing or just waiting for the withdrawals to pass.

OT: my breakfast was 80mg oxy, 12mg bromazepam. A few hours later I shot 2mg loprazolam, stupid move. I spent most of the day passed the fuck out. Lol. Won't be doing that again during the day. Can't remember the last time I had a benzo this potent. Even triazolam, while still pretty powerful, isn't quite as strong as this.

ps: yes there is a thread like this already. It's called: 'What was your morning fix?'
If the higher-ups weren't slacking so much and modded me up already I'd be able to merge these threads. But it looks like their slacking nature hasn't changed in the time I wasn't a mod. =D

Time for me to PM the powers that be and make 'm work fast0r.
 
@ovo1024 - haha no I don't hate! And I'm a she just FYI despite how my name seems to come across. Never did H cuz I figured I'd kill myself with it for sure. And yeah I'm in AZ too. Wicked heat but at least there's cloud cover over this town today!
@DeeDeeDrug- well shit cuz I'm headed to FL in a few days. Was SO hoping for an easier summer there. I do miss thunderstorms though so at least there's that!
@Pill2Chill- I totally lol to that wishing for a relapse soon...or the end of wds. I still don't know how it'll play out myself but it was good to laugh over the predicament at least!
 
-1,800 mgs Pharmaceutical Piracetam
-Choline bitartrate and inisotol
-60 mgs IR Adderall
-2 mgs kpin
-200mg the edible made with concentrate
-bowls of Gorilla Glue #98, Blue Dream, Sour OG, and Thin Mints.
 
1 double stacker pill
2 velvet bean capsules
1 cup strong coffee
1.5g green bali kratom

600mg gabapentin
5 mg fluphenazine
150mg Effexor XL
300mg Wellbutrin SR
 
150mg caffeine via equal parts of chilled medium roast coffee and whole milk mix for alertness and calories (my new go to :))
2.5mg valium for taper day #2 (i want out!)

will munch a clif bar when i get an appetite.
 
^What makes you want to quit the valium all of a sudden? I can relate though, there have been a few times where I wanted to quit taking benzos, and a few times I have quit taking benzos. But I just have too much anxiety in me. I really need my benzos to feel 'okay' and semi-confident. Even when I was off them for about a year and the PAWS were over, I was still just too damn anxious so eventually went back. Now I'm not planning to quit them again any time soon, maybe never. As long as I have it under control I'm fine with it.

You seem to have your benzo-use well under control as well, that's why I was wondering why the sudden change of heart and willingness to get off them.
 
warning: off topic bullshit ahoy!!!

full story: ive been anxious my whole life. i remember having a severe panic attack when i was fucking 9 years old over a goddamn math problem in school. but somehow i made it thru school fine. when i was entering university i started doing way more drugs, cocktails all the time, and when i was 20 i had a supremely horrible panic attack that led to a celexa and klonopin combo. i didnt like the celexa but discontinuing one meant discontinuing both since the crackpot uni psych always prescribed the two in tandem. my roommate at the time had the same doc and meds and we just used the clonazepam recreationally and traded it all the time.

i got thru uni age 22 and until age 25 was fine without anxiety meds and to that point i never used them as rxed anyway. i got caught by LEOs with pills around this time and this led to getting a legit script from my awesome doc who would rather i got pills the right way instead of illicitly. by pills i mean benzos. i didnt wanna fuck up a good thing so ive been taking 5-10mg average daily for the last 2.5 years (im 28 now). sometimes i would take up to 30mg if i was really upset and the most ive ever taken was 55mg. ive never once run out ahead of time, usually because id substitute benzos for constant drinking on weekends, and then switch back come monday.

now that i have been using them for so long i feel like its time to either give up the crutch or resign to lifetime use. ive heard anecdotal evidence of permanent brain chemistry changes from long term use as well. i would like to quit benzos even though they help me for the same reason i loathe ADs, despite common sense telling me i should be on them. primarily, id rather feel pain than nothing at all, and secondly, potential side effects... admittedly less severe with benzos. there ya have it.

if my taper succeeds ill have a full gram of valium in reserve for emergencies and friendly giveaways. my opiate buddies love it when i shower them with leftovers.

tl;dr i survived most of my whole life without them, and i think i can do that again. benzos are great but at this point i think i can escape without major complications and it was good while it lasted. time for some suck-it-up syle willpower.
 
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instead of going to bed i just kept drinking and watching tv so my morning fix was a can of lager.

ill try to get some coffee in before work which will predictably be quite rough.
 
warning: off topic bullshit ahoy!!!

I see, that was pretty much my reasoning as well when I came off them. Then when I realized I was better off just taking them I went back on them with no immediate plans of quitting.

OT: OC'd (160mg) & 12mg bromazepam

/edit: oops, just realised this isn't the how high thread. My morning fix was .. eh, 160mg OC and 2,5mg lorazepam.
 
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