Yet 500ug of LSD is not a problem for you
I'd handle 500mg of caffeine 5 times easier than 500ug of LSD. In fact I'd handle it 50 times easier.
One time though i took over a gram of caffeine at once and had the bright idea to drive to a bookstore right after it taking it. I was a trembling drooling mess and got into a fender bender in the parking lot. It was a pretty black woman who apparently didn't have insurance so she took off despite it being my fault.
It’s been harder recently. This is not the most suitable time in history though to be taking LSD fullstop, let alone full on.
The age of the downer lol. Hence me being where I am currently. The Etiz was always coming, and I’d likely have gone nuts without it.
I’m trying to address it. It was actually a bad 500 ug trip about 6 weeks ago that motivated me to start. Now, I can actually handle the huge acid doses, the headspace, zero apprehension about myself and the world, other people, how to be, act, communicate, just be myself.
There’s never any difficulty there, I’m extremely cemented.
The bad trip was wrong from the off. I knew it wasn’t wise taking the half mg as soon as it was in my mouth.
Previous, glorious 500 ug and bigger trips, I went into them very differently to that one.
I had messed up and painful indigestion prior, which can get exacerbated on a trip, into really painful acid indigestion and mucus production. I take the big doses usually with large edible doses too, which is a supreme and very friendly compliment and boost, it’s like an extra few hundred ug effectively.
But this ill-advised time to trip, I also vaporized a load of weed before I’d come up fully.
Being so gone on acid and knowing not much is okay but when you only are aware of pain, it makes the bad trip, there’s no other focus.
I’m an expert at handling bad trips. Knowing I’m not going to really be harmed by it directly, it’s just time and endurance. That one stretched on, beyond my endurance, over 10 hours of the most extreme physical discomfort.
It really toughened my resolve. Positive momentum can come out of bad trips. I was and have been chronically exhausted, and I had no physical or conscious energy for the intensity and endurance.
When basically physically comfortable, a mg can be as easy and heavenly as anything on earth, start to end.
I’ve also had significant nerve and nerve ending damage from two neurological viruses concurrent with Long Covid, aka nerve based (but still localised) before recovering from PVFS from 6 week Flu in January.
The physical nerve damage is understandably making LSD harder to handle, total exhaustion too. Of all the drugs, LSD has always strangely caused major fatigue days after, even young.
So 21 mg’s in 20 weeks at such an unsettled, frankly dismal apocalyptic time, with major physical damage and CNS related anxiety, PVFS (post-viral…)
Acid isn’t the recipe. 16 days off today. I could actually trip. On a huge dose, but physically I’m not energised enough, have gained a lot of weight though somehow.
I was under 51 kg’s in 2019 and falling. 6 foot, big, never slightly fat but wide, broad guy, 67 kg’s minimum ideally.
I started the Etiz in Oct 2019 to address a life threatening anxiety related eating and digestive order, heavily connected to being allergic to no joke, 99% of everything consumable- make me a list I’ll tick it off I swear. Sounds wild, but that 1% has kept me alive yet.
So, I honestly believe, the Etiz, ironically, which I began with to prevent my anxiety condition from making it impossible for me to relax to eat and digest food, I was already improving rapidly by November 2019.
Now, I’m about 64 kg’s! An achievement. I would honestly have dropped unregainable weight otherwise.
But now I’m in this most urged against ditch of heavy (thieno)benzo dependance.
After that gruelling trip due to physical pain, I dropped the Etiz from about 18 to 10 mg’s daily, held it for 10 days but the heavy wave of rebound anxiety really unnerred (I think that’s a word we grew up knowing) me.
I went up, down, up up, down again in dosage in an unsettled time. Now I’m actually about 10.7 mg’s daily, kind of on a run.
With determination. I’m not looking to it, trying not to rely, see it as a spontaneous release, desire, place of comfort, as I was before.
It’s going to be harder than I considered, but I’ve done well I think to stick with a marked dosage drop.
Taking acid atm with the nerve damage isn’t going to make tapering easier.
I have a local walk in addiction service team of doctors and nurses to visit after concluding CBT aren’t qualified enough to help me with this.
Like, try keeping a CBT therapist’s attention beyond “Thieno…” lol. That’s as far as it goes.
And like, 21 mg’s LSD in 20 weeks, it’s just hyroglyphics to them. It’s relevant to the overall situation, I need to be open about all my drug usage to set goals, break patterns, but not to a laymen.
1050 ug a week?? No? 4 full blown LSD trips a week? 10.5 tabs? 3-4 OG Microdots?
Ahh, a slight glint of comprehension, but only slight.
I hope the addiction team will be educated on the distinction between thienobenz and benzo. It could be significant. I’ve zero traditional Benzo in my system.
Thing is, again, Etiz pure powder is the only psychoactive substance, besides coconut oil cannabis edibles, that doesn’t cause an allergenic respiratory reaction.
I could not touch a prescription tablet I know of, I’ve ingredient checked hundreds.
Diazepam included. The “normal” person would be prescribed longer half-lifed Vals. Unless they could compound the powder only in rice flour for me, the tablets with lactose +++ would be worse than WD and likely fatal sooner.
I need to seek them as a sounder though. I’m looking to hold where I am for a bit, get used to not feeling high on it, not using as a coping mechanism, just keeping discomfort and restlessness endurable really.
I’m strong mentally, it’s the physical where my problems really, really stem from, fuck Lyme, I was incredibly fit before, infinite energy, cat landing on my feet, no effort a single part of living fully.
So that’s a work in progress.
Now
@negrogesic I wanted to answer you at the time, my love for 1 mg acid specifically was discovered years ago, no benzos, only cannabis used then.
It was identical. Instant bliss, sent by baseball bat and express mail lol.
Swooning in an armchair, in a dimensional crack between time/space blah blah, this crazy, intricate dream world of visions, insights, true ones, a glance from years to years and certain concepts, lifelines, the most insane imaginative humorous angle etc,
I still get that. It’s like waking from a dream, purposely because you are so awed you want to snap round and remember it.
But it’s so hard to bring that stuff back!
I drift in and out of it for hours, blissfully, in true psychedelia.
But you would be able to turn up, sit with me, I’d snap round, make you a tea, chill, relax, pay attention. You might or might not even see a clue I was even tripping, depending on day and point.
I could take Acid for 14 days straight, without developing a tolerance these days, be losing my shit lol, or not take any for 14 days, as just completed.
Now, I know this for a fact. My mum had zero idea I had started tripping again in February, 8 mg’s in 18 days, 1875 ug day one.
I never told her. She had zero suspicion.
I was having ++++ rabbit hole trips, I’ll not be the same again. But I still acted, spoke, be’d (haha, new conjugation), like my usual self outwardly.
LSD doesn’t change ME. It does, but in my own natural developing way.
It’s a phenomenon though.
Sometimes, Im clearly obliterated on even 300 ug. Others, 1000 having the most crystal, captivating trip just holding back giggles in place of a calm, delightful grin, and a room full of people will insist they can’t tell at all.
Im like, what? I am tripping so much trust me.
So likewise, I’ve not told my mum, this is day 16 no acid. She would have no idea, or beliefs either way, unless I say.
Sorry
@negrogesic got carried, always like reading your thoughts thanks for the mention and hope you’re doing well.
I’m a bit potty atm, the WD’s plus about 250-300 mg’s THC daily, helping actually to not crave more Etiz but adds to the anxiety in a way.
Edible cannabis, not overly dosed, is much less anxiety triggering than fast onset peak vapor and smoke THC form.