Opioids produce feelings which I can describe as divine and wonderful. When I have dosed an opioid other than my normal regimen of 100 mg tramadol three times daily, I feel like all of the bad in the world cannot harm me, like anything but the great feelings of the opioid and enjoying those feelings is not important for me to be well. They have a way, too, of making the beautiful in the world to seem even better, yet make the bad seem harmless in a subjective sense. They make me feel as if I am at the best place I could ever be - a feeling of complete peace. They kill discomfort, whether it be physical pain or emotional pain of whatever sort. For example, they will obliterate, in a way so different than any other drug, the anxiety that I might otherwise feel, even if warranted. They do provide a sort of a protective blanket feeling, because pain just does not register as pain, and to know one will just feel great is so comforting within itself. Opioids make me feel so special, too, which I know must sound odd, but they make me feel truly okay; they feel to me to be 'where it's at'. It is as if opioids are the best thing in the world, from how my personal feelings work. They also give the great ability to nod - so placid a state, sometimes with nice and vivid imagery, all of which tie back into their appeal for me. Opioids are probably the only drugs I would say I love, and I would be right. I 'love' many others, but I have the wonderful love one has for another person for opioids, and those are the only drugs I feel quite that way about. One will never quite understand why a junkie is a junkie until he tastes the love of an opioid - opioids are just different, I feel. This is not my best description, but I am tired and worn.
