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What is your thought for the day?

T

Tryptomaniacs

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 3, 2016
Messages
66
Location
Chicago
Post your thoughts right here! Whether they are drug related or not I wanna know what you all are thinking (:


my thought for for right now is that I'm using far to many pain medications for my post op tonsillectomy and I'm falling back into old habits, opiates are a beautiful experience and feel so good but they are hell once they are gone and I'm worried /: I'll probably order some kratom and tianeptine to help slowly wean off this hydro/codeine that I have been alternating back and fourth from, I want to stay clean though I need to stop using drugs gahhhh

what are your thoughts for the day guys?
 
Surprisingly my thoughts are very similar to yours, my friend. I've been using drugs WAY too much in the last couple months. In my case, it's amphetamines. Similar to your feelings about opiate experiences, I feel speed can open up channels of being and creativity that are valuable and unique, and I cherish that feeling.

But if I'm honest with myself I have to say that my use has been anything but moderate or beneficial.

Tryptomaniacs said:
I want to stay clean though I need to stop using drugs gahhhh
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My thoughts exactly, dude. Literally. By sharing your thoughts and desire to live healthier, I'm able to acknowledge my desperate need to make better choices right now. I hope we both take paths that in the future we'll be glad we took.
 
Solitude we both can and will go down the right paths i believe, it all just takes time i had a long run woth amphetamines myself once particularly vyvanse id stay up for days and get so much done but then opiates came along and benzos and hallucinogens and all sorts of goodies and i realized i liked stuff that make me feel more relaxed and tored than anxious and speedy although some people get relaxed on amps im not one of them lol.

My thought is im on day 4 of recovery from my tonsilectomy and when i woke up the pain was so bad i couldnt talk for an hour, doubled up on my liquid codeine and extra popsicles today! Oh also if any of you ever get a tonsilectomy buy nugget ice its anazing on the throat.

But im in the worst prt of recovery the doc said days 4-7 are the worst so great lol and then another anazing thing about this is ill probably be in opiate withdrawl once i recover i may order some kratom to help me out with that nit sure yet.
 
Tryptomaniacs said:
Post your thoughts right here! Whether they are drug related or not I wanna know what you all are thinking (:


my thought for for right now is that I'm using far to many pain medications for my post op tonsillectomy and I'm falling back into old habits, opiates are a beautiful experience and feel so good but they are hell once they are gone and I'm worried /: I'll probably order some kratom and tianeptine to help slowly wean off this hydro/codeine that I have been alternating back and fourth from, I want to stay clean though I need to stop using drugs gahhhh

what are your thoughts for the day guys?
Click to expand...

Suicide is painless, it brings on many changes, and I can take or leave it if I try.
 
I start a new job next week so I've been trying to get big projects done around the house to begin this job with a clear head. I'm very OCD, so having this stuff done is important to my functional wellbeing lol. I didn't sleep well last night so I got up early today for a relaxing cigarette and coffee session, only to realize I'm out of smokes. Though the store is a two minute drive from my house, I wasn't planning on going, so I guess I'm going to not smoke for the day (that damn OCD again lol). I actually just started back up with the smoking last month to get through trazodone with withdrawal. I was on it for 15 years for sleep, and have been wanting to get off it for a while. I can happily say I am no longer on any prescriptions, but my cigarette smoking is out of control again lol. So, today I quit cigs as I can't smoke at the new job, and since starting smoking again I have realized how they disrupt my sleep and increase my anxiety.

Fingers crossed for a productive smoke free day!
 
I'm freaked out about my new suboxone prescription. This is my second week on it (actually on Zubsolv...same difference) after about a year of abortive tries at quitting a three year dope habit. In all honesty, the zubs are a miracle...the hell i made from craving/depression/suicide attempts has receded into the background of my thoughts. But a little voice in my head makes me feel like the progress I'm making isn't real, isn't authentic, like I'm as fucked up as ever but with rose-colored glasses on due to the meds. This is of course bullshit; maybe echoes of my failed stint in NA or maybe just me being a dick.

I wanted to stop using heroin, and so far suboxone is really helping me reach that goal. Why can't I let myself feel good about that? Sigh. End of rant.
 
My first thought of the day was either "arg why do i have a lot of out going expenses due to a lack of payment from being an addict right when i get clean and want to do fun stuff again?" or "when is my motivation going to restore so i can get some projects done?"

Today makes 3 weeks off methadone and sure i am almost sleeping through the night, use to wake up every 2-3 hours now its like 4-5 so its once a night not 3 times. So i am happy that i am almost sleeping but I use to have so much energy i bought all this stuff for projects and i just cant seem to get motivated to do them :(

But I understand these to be "sober problems" and i greatly prefer them over my previous "heroin problems" of the last 4 years.
 
x_benzo_girl said:
I start a new job next week so I've been trying to get big projects done around the house to begin this job with a clear head. I'm very OCD, so having this stuff done is important to my functional wellbeing lol. I didn't sleep well last night so I got up early today for a relaxing cigarette and coffee session, only to realize I'm out of smokes. Though the store is a two minute drive from my house, I wasn't planning on going, so I guess I'm going to not smoke for the day (that damn OCD again lol). I actually just started back up with the smoking last month to get through trazodone with withdrawal. I was on it for 15 years for sleep, and have been wanting to get off it for a while. I can happily say I am no longer on any prescriptions, but my cigarette smoking is out of control again lol. So, today I quit cigs as I can't smoke at the new job, and since starting smoking again I have realized how they disrupt my sleep and increase my anxiety.

Fingers crossed for a productive smoke free day!
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Good luck, x_benzo_girl. <3


My thought for the day is that I have to get control of my worrying. I have a home. I have food. I live with people I love. I live in a safe community. Any problems I may have are challenges and not tragedies. There! I talked myself out of worrying for 60 seconds.=D
 
To catch myself confusing thinking with Being - both coexist, independently and together but are elastic and; I get to decide what appropriate thoughts to play with, in the moment and honour the right choice; rather than let them control me. <3
 
My thoughts are posotive today (: woke up its nice and sunny outside (cold but sunny) im popping maybe 100 mg dxm just to enhance my day! And its gonna be a good time! I had some bourbon chicken and i only have to work the day shift today whitch is nice! Hope yall are having a good friday!
 
Tryptomaniacs said:
My thoughts are posotive today (: woke up its nice and sunny outside (cold but sunny) im popping maybe 100 mg dxm just to enhance my day! And its gonna be a good time! I had some bourbon chicken and i only have to work the day shift today whitch is nice! Hope yall are having a good friday!
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I woke to snow but sober and my thought is. Tina is the worst drug I've tried. Never again and I need a week to stop everything (other then my pain meds. Maybe some k )
 
^^^
Good to see you posting!

Learned of two deaths today, nether of which had to happen. Sad for lives cut short.
 
Great, another day.

It's been pretty hard recently, i haven't done much but all these 'things' are piling on each other, making the next day less meaningful and more shallow then the previous.
 
I woke up today feeling really happy, ive been kinda sober these past 3 months and i ordered some kratom yesterday it should be here saturday or monday and im super excited. Im tired as shit though. I have a long day ahead of meee
 
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