What is it with guys taking advantage of girls on E?

[Invalid Usename]

Oh no, I was taken advantage of by spammers: they got my email address and distributed it and know I get unwanted emails... RAPE, RAPE, RAPE!!!

The local walmart is taking advantage of me right now, I just saw some-one deliver a flyer into my mailbox without permission... RAPE, RAPE, RAPE!!!!!

Sexual play thing? She got a couple fucking text messages.... RAPE RAPE RAPE!!!!

Jesus fucking christ...

She wasn't taken advantage of, she should have been in full control of her mental faculties... She was lucky the guy didn't just leave with her cell phone, then maybe she could argue that her kindness was taken advantage of.

So I guess if you were rolling heavy and two aggressive gay men started coming on to you, and made it a point to try to kiss you and rub their privates on your butt, that you would not feel taken advantage of.


Personally, I think that it sucks that some many men feel that a woman's lot in life is to be the recipient of their sexual advances when they are unwanted.

What exactly is it about a woman's personal space that males feel it is their right to violate it?


BTW, she DON'T give anyone her phone number, they stole it. (Kind of like someone looking over your shoulder and getting your credit card number during a purchase.) Big difference from "giving."

 

[BilZ0r]

No, I wouldn't feel taken advantage of, that exact same thing has happened to me. It's a matter of leaving, getting out of situations that are bad, and making yourself clear. I would feel taken advantage of, if I passed out, and then came to with them ass-fucking me...

I very much doubt any of these guys were trying to make her feel uncomfortable, they were just trying to get layed and they didn't know what they were doing... People get less than subtle when they are drunk.

I didn't say she did GIVE anyone her phone number (or if I did, I didn't mean to), but recieving some unwanted text messages is hardly an invasion of privacy.

 

[Staticage]

Maybe you have yourself to blame. No one forced you to get wasted.

what the fuck? have you never gotten wasted? being on drugs is in no way a reason to blame yourself for certain guys being dicks and trying to fuck anything that moves.

 

[iamtha1]

Thanks to everyone who has replied. The reason I posted in the first place is to clarify the increased male attention once I was in an even more vulnerable E-induced state. I do agree that yes, its never a good idea to be that smashed for pure safety, especially being a girl. But because it was the first time I'd been 'wasted' on combo of alcohol and E, I was surprised at how I reacted.

What was bizarre was that when I was drunk, even in my inebriated state I was still able to stand up for myself, tell guys to stay away etc. I don't know if people understood this from my first post:

After that, things got a bit messy. Once I was rolling, this guy who had kind of been around the whole night, suddenly moved in and cornered me at moments to try and kiss me.

The guy was actually around from the moment I walked in. I kept telling him politely to "fuck off!" the entire time when I was drinking. But once I was rolling, I didn't feel loved up towards him or anything, but at the same time I couldn't tell him to fuck off. I just remained in this constant paranoia, sick state of mind, completely uncomfortable. I kept trying to run off but he'd just be there. So in a way, I did feel taken advantage of, even emotionally.

I guess I am just interested to see what people think about the alcohol/drugs combo, I felt completely drunk most of the time, but with weird complacent feelings that couldn't even be called 'loved up' because they were sort-of muted?

Yes, it made a difference that I was at a particularly popular drinking club, I've never encountered problems at raves or harder clubs, which surprises most people. I find that people that are either there for the music, the dancing. Or the drugs (which I don't know why they'd be out at a club therefore, but anyway). I think the drinking and drug wavelengths are just so different.

With the phone sms thing, the guys were friends of my cousin's new boyfriend. So I knew of them, but not really. I suppose it was about trust, even though I didn't know them very well, I trusted that they wouldn't do something like that. Its like I trusted that the guy wouldn't run off with my phone as well!

For one, MDMA and alcohol don't mix well. You should've known that before you did it. Maybe you shouldn't be doing mixes that you don't know anything about. You're lucky that you just ended up with an upset stomach.

The obvious answer for this is that it's true, but I suppose I thought because every guy I know who has ever tried drugs has to be drunk first, that's the reason why I didn't shut down the pill offer when it came up. But it will be my first and last mixing experience, I really wasn't a fan.

I've gotten drunk before and rolled before (seperately) and never felt the whole 'taken advantage of' thing to the extent of that night. So basically I posted to understand 'Was it the alcohol/E mix?' 'The fact that I was in a drinking club?' 'Because I looked retarded?' 'Do guys go for that whole retarded look thing?' Lol

And for God's sake people I was wearing pants! This kind of thing does not just happen to girls who were 'asking for it' by wearing a short skirt. I've actually found that whenever I've worn skirts, guys are more likely to be intimidated and not harass. Funny how this happened when I was in pants!

So unless you want to end up with some STD because you got "taken advantage of", don't mix MDMA and alcohol, and maybe don't do either one unless you have the ability to stand up for yourself and be the bitch you need to be. I think it's pretty obvious that I'm able to do that, which is why I'm a huge ecstasy user with no sexually transmitted diseases.

Why is E even considered a sexual drug??? It wasn't about that, it was about the fact that I felt violated being in such an obviously vulnerable state. Nothing sexual happened except for a kiss, the phone thing was not sexual at all, but I was still almost in tears for the fact that I was like 'Why can't he leave me alone?' 'Why do they have my number?' Its about respecting other humans, particularly when they appear vulnerable. It is so much more of an emotional issue rather then a sexual one. Anyway, thanks for the input anyway, 'huge ecstasy user' ey? You should
read this:

I think it was the whole thing about not being able to tell the guys where to go. When I'm drinking I'm actually quite aggressive and when I'm rolling I'm just honest - 'I'm sorry I just really don't want to dance with you!' But it was the combo that was weird for me, I basically just had paranoia to the point of sickness. I was intimidated! I felt afterwards like I'd deserved it & nothing sexual had even happened! No wonder girls who get date-raped never go to the police.

CrimsonDreams, you're completely right with your interpretation of what happened. What's interesting is that I actually enjoy rolling at huge events more because I know that most people are rolling as well, with sexual things the last thing on their mind. After what has happened, I've come to realise that drinking clubs are one of the worst places to roll.

fastandbulbous, Invalid Usename, Pippin - your supportive posts were very touching, thanks. I don't want anyone to ever think I posted with the intention of getting sympathy, in reality, I knew I'd probably cop a lot of shit. BilZOr, I also know what you're getting at, cheers for the informative input, I really hope you don't think I'm some slut that brings this on myself all the time (of course, not saying that you do think that, posts can be taken the wrong way at times as we all know).

well, i think she was taken advantage of to a certain extent because she was inebriated even though she wasn't raped. i mean, i've taken advantage of people who were fucked up and got this kid to pay me and all my friends money for no fucking reason.

thursday, my mates have done the same thing! A couple of them work at a convenience store and get their laughs out of convincing the kids off their heads to buy all the shit that supposedly 'increases their roll' and they make the stoned kids all paranoid for no reason just for fun. It sounds funny but when you think about its pretty harsh and another form of taking advantage seeing as we're on the topic!

Peace out

 

[thursday]

i was drunk.

 

[iamtha1]

Out of interest what did you say to this kid to make him pay you?

 

[thursday]

it was dumb. the guy was being a total spas and people were talking shit to him so he was trying to get out of there. i told him he couldn't leave with the drink he had unless he paid me cuz he was under 21. i was just fucking with him and didn't think he'd actually do it. i mean, i'm only fuckin 19 and i look like i'm 16 and there were plenty of other people around who were underage too.
and once he took out his wallet everyone else started hassling him saying that he had to pay them for being in the apartment, for smoking their weed(which he didn't even get a hit of cuz he coughed into the bong like a retard before he even got a hit), and all this other bullshit.

i guess i kinda feel bad. but not really. if someone would have said that to me i woulda told them to fuck off.

 

[rollmodel36]

Most girls I know can't name their first pill,let alone most of the ones they've taken in the past.*note*I said MOST girls,so those who can,please don't respond) The reason being is this. Most girls don't pay for their pills. I have been around a lot of girls who wanted me to give them a pill just because I had some on me. I was weak in my early days and gave them a free tab or two. One girl,after promising me that she would roll with me that night,actually took the tab I gave her and took off with several other guys. There were a few incidents along this line. My point is,the whole "taking advantage" thing works both ways. Most girls feel we guys are obligated to pay for their pills,as if we were on a dinner date. I don't fall for this shit anymore. If a girl wants to roll with me,she'd better be able to get hers(unless I'm dating her,of course) Otherwise,she can roll her ass right out of my face.

BTW, I don't condone anyone taking advantage of anyone under the influence of ANY drug. These people are no better than rapists.

 

[DJDannyUhOh]

It's a matter of leaving, getting out of situations that are bad, and making yourself clear.

I totally agree. Every woman should know it as common knowledge that in a club environment, especially towards closing, it's shark infested waters. Even in the high profile clubs here in Chicago, one of my favorite things to do when rolling is to watch the circus that ensues when the females become scarce and the testosterone-pumped sharks do everything possible short of rape to avoid going home with their tales between their legs to another night of jerkin' off. It's unfortunate, but every woman who wants to avoid this situation either needs to be with some close friends or not drink too much. Also, unless you know the guy pretty well, never let him buy you a drink without you seeing it from the moment it's made to the moment it hits your hand. You'd be suprised how many guys slip it into your drink, especially the one who follow you around all night as if to wait for it to take affect.

 

[thursday]

BTW, I don't condone anyone taking advantage of anyone under the influence of ANY drug. These people are no better than rapists.

then i guess if they went that far then they should have just raped her right?

don't you think you trivialize rape when you equivocate stealing someone's # to committing one of the most degrading and traumatizing acts of violating another person's rights?

 

[fastandbulbous]

For whoever said,"most girls don't pay for their pills", er, no not in my experience (the only ones who don't are ones in a relationship with the person with the pills, and they generally buy the drinks anyway), but maybe that's another difference between the US and the UK.

There are people, both male and female out there, who will take advantage of any situation without any feelings of guilt about using people, regardless of the consequences for the people they use; they are called sociopaths, and are surprisingly common in the population (think it's something like 1 in 50 people show sociopathic tendancies), but they're also some of the most adept manipulators of people as well.

It's because of them that people have to be careful about alcohol/MDMA etc induced vunerability, but even the people who aren't sociopaths can take advantage, but it's usually because they're in a fucked up state as well.

Although in the original post, it seems more like they were being drunken arseholes, rather than some sociopathic behaviour, you can never know, so that's why people should avoid getting totally twatted if they don't have immediate access to people that they know are trustworthy.

PS. Yes, I've been an arsehole when drunk in the past (a very long time ago), but I've never done anything like what happened in the 1st post. It's always used to be shouting (can't call it singing - very few would!) late at night, or things like doing a streak at 4 in the morning.

As I've said before about meeting new people, hope for the best, but at the back of your mind, expect the worst; at least until you get to know them.

 

[dankstersauce]

you noticed how gross most clubs are.

i think that explains the whole deal. alot of people at clubs r lookin for someone to go home with. so whatya thinks gonna happen when ur wasted surrounded by a bunch of sketch balls who are lookin to get laid?
alot of these douches could never have sex with a sober chick, so when they see an attractive female all intoxicated they think it's there chance to act like they're in a music video


it's not right. it's mad fucked up. but people are people

 

[rollmodel36]

then i guess if they went that far then they should have just raped her right?

don't you think you trivialize rape when you equivocate stealing someone's # to committing one of the most degrading and traumatizing acts of violating another person's rights?

What the hell are you talking about? I'm not trivializing rape in any way,shape or form. Where the hell did you get that I equate(and that is the proper word)with stealing someone's #? Maybe you should actually read a post instead of trying to see how many posts you can rack up. I see your pointless posts in almost every section.

 

[thursday]

BTW, I don't condone anyone taking advantage of anyone under the influence of ANY drug. These people are no better than rapists.

if stealing someone's cellphone number is no better than raping someone, then it follows that raping someone is no worse than stealing someone's number. that is the equivocation(and, yes, that's the appropriate word, go look it up, mr. smarty pants.) you are making.

stealing someone's cell # while they're inebriated isn't very polite, but i definitely don't consider it as bad as raping someone. but i'm not as smart as you apparently since my posts are all pointless and yours are chock-full of brilliant insight.

ps. chill the fuck out.

 

[C1RCA STARR]

I have just always thought that alcohol and pills dont match to well. Buzzin off some alcohol's cool, but drunk as shit and poppin one would just be too much shit creepin up on me at once. E is great alone too.. just make sure the environment is right and you will have a great roll.

 

[TROPIKAL]

I think that guys that try and take advantage of girls just cause they r drunk or on anything else is realy pathetic. I dont care if the girl is passed out ass naked that doesnt mean its fair game and u can do what u want.

Some guys out there r so lame and r loosers cause they cant get girls any other way. They sit there and prey on girls who r a little trashed at a club. I know you have seen them before, they sit there and basicaly stalk girls on the dance floor. They get so aggresive on when the girl keeps teeling them no they think the girl is a bitch.

Thats why its a good idea to have a guy friend that u can trust go out with u. That way when these assholes wont leave u alone they can be dealt with. Its horrible that girls cant go out with their girlfriends and have a good time and dance without the harrasment.

I know not all guys r like that because im a guy myself. But they r out they just waiting to find the girls that r hammered because they know it is easier prey for they.

late!

 

[teetmanike]

I think this is more of a "taking advantage of a girl on alcohol" rather than on E.

exactly what i was thinking..

 

[fastandbulbous]

^ In general, this is really a thread about taking advantage of people (mostly women, for gender based reasons) who are under the influence of any drug, or combination thereof, E and alcohol being the specific case.

Although alcohol, GHB etc would be the main offenders, any drug that lowers your ability to interpret a situation would fit hereThe main problem with MDMA, in this situation, is that you're inclined to be oversensetive to what sort of response you might elicit if you actually did turn round and tell someone to 'fuck off' (empathy you can't turn off isn't always good); with others, it might be lack of physical coordination (alcohol etc) or an inability to recognise certain social cues (LSD, psilocybin etc).

In the past, I've seen predatory males mistake a woman's good mood, talkitiveness (and huge pupils) etc as meaning that they were loved up, and more likely to not tell them to go away, so that they impose themselves, only to find that said woman was cranked off her head and prepared to damage them physically, along with a noticably loud 'fuck off' shouted in their face.

In that case, woe betide anybody who doesn't fuck off as instructed!

 

[rollmodel36]

if stealing someone's cellphone number is no better than raping someone, then it follows that raping someone is no worse than stealing someone's number. that is the equivocation(and, yes, that's the appropriate word, go look it up, mr. smarty pants.) you are making.

stealing someone's cell # while they're inebriated isn't very polite, but i definitely don't consider it as bad as raping someone. but i'm not as smart as you apparently since my posts are all pointless and yours are chock-full of brilliant insight.

ps. chill the fuck out.

I never mentioned a cell number and have no idea what you are talking about. Idiot. If that was something mentioned in the original post,that's NOT what I was talking about.

 

[thursday]

what is meant by the phrase "loved up?"