Codeine phosphate was the drug that first ignited my love affair with opiates.
I was curious about what it was like for all of the people I had administered opiates to in a professional capacity; some seemed to love and embrace the experience, others seemed truly freaked out by it.
I was aware that in the majority of people codeine phosphate is metabolised to morphine so I figured it would be as good an opioid as any to allow me to experience what it felt like to have your opioid receptors artificially stimulated. And anyway, codeine isn't even a controlled drug here so what harm could it do?. I 'borrowed' some tablets from work and took 90mg, which I had calculated would be approx. equivalent to 10mg morphine. I downed the tablets on an empty stomach with a cup of tea and half an hour later I was in love with this drug.
I soon started taking codeine at work to 'help' me through the shift. I reasoned that it actually made me better at my job as it made me feel more empathic towards people and more cheerful towards my colleagues. It really is strange how a person rationalises something that deep, deep down they know is wrong.
Well, to cut a long story short, after eventually graduating to IV diamorphine (used very extensively in clinical practice in the UK) via various other opioids and nearly losing my job and professional registration in the process, I am now on prescribed morphine maintenance treatment (400mg/day) and expect to be on it for a long period of time.
There is not a day that goes by that I do not regret that fateful afternoon of tea and codeine.