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What are you craving? v. Feel Good Hit of the Summer

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I'm waiting on 2 people, neither of which are inspiring much confidence.

If these 2 people fall through then I'm maybe 3 days away from combined benzo/opiate WD. The benzo WD is completely new to me, but I haven't been using that long and the amounts have not been that high, but I'm still going to feel it. I've got enough sub to maybe go 3 days, but I'm probably going to try to stretch that out as long as possible.

I was all set to get more sub a week ago, but the kid I would have gotten them from ODed and passed away from a combination of too much oxy, xanax, and alcohol.


So

Suboxone and xanax is what I'm craving.
 
I was all set to get more sub a week ago, but the kid I would have gotten them from ODed and passed away from a combination of too much oxy, xanax, and alcohol.

That's fucking heavy, man. :(

Why not take the plunge and get your own Suboxone script? I've been contemplating it for like 2 years now for myself... I guess it's a money issue for me mostly. :\

Anyway, OT: I want a strong opiate/opioid. Fackkkkkkkkkk.
 
^I actually can get high on top of Methadone if I want to because im not on a blocking dosage. What's strange is that my tolerance seems to be pretty low, but if I start a binge it builds up insanely fast. As far as potentiator's go, I'm not to crazy about diphenhydramine. I mean, don't Get me wrong, it totally works, but Benadryl gives me nasty hangovers, similar to alchohol so it's not really worth it. Besides, I get a nice glow from my Methadone as it is. Last weekend I expiramented and plugged my take home dose, and I got really stoned off it. I might do that here and there,but don't want to make a weekly habit out of it.

Yea man, once you have a habit your tolerance builds to fast when you binge, even if you take a long break from everything. That's why whenever I see threads with people asking how long of a break to take in order for their opiate tolerance to go down I always mention that once they start using again after the break they need to keep it to once a week, or twice a week max, otherwise they will find their tolerance to end up right back where it was after only a few days of using continuously.

And speaking of methadone, that's probably what I am craving. One nice dose would get me really high, and I would not have to worry about doing any other opies for at least a few days.
 
Why not take the plunge and get your own Suboxone script? I've been contemplating it for like 2 years now for myself... I guess it's a money issue for me mostly. :\

I've had a script before. I was on it for 14 months straight at one point where I took suboxone everyday. For months 5-12 I was on a routine dose of 2mg a day and then I spent 2 full months doing a slow taper from 2mg to nothing.

The doctor I had made it seem like I was already on a really low dose at 2mg and it seemed like he would have had me jump at something much higher than the 0.1mg I tapered down to. The doctor I had never pushed for a lower dose or had any kind of idea when people should get off sub. He never brought up gettting off it after a year of seeing him. I got tired of being on sub and decided to taper on my own. I generally don't like being on sub. I'd like to have some to do a proper taper with, but I don't think it's worth the effort to get a doctor and get back on some kind of program.
 
I wish I could smoke weed right now...I'd say I'd smoke a huge blunt but seeing as its been a year since I last smoked, I'd take like 2 hits and pass out. Still...I miss you mary jane </3

I would say alcohol but I woke up this morning feeling hungover as hell, unable to get out of bed or eat until the afternoon.
 
I've had a script before. I was on it for 14 months straight at one point where I took suboxone everyday. For months 5-12 I was on a routine dose of 2mg a day and then I spent 2 full months doing a slow taper from 2mg to nothing.

The doctor I had made it seem like I was already on a really low dose at 2mg and it seemed like he would have had me jump at something much higher than the 0.1mg I tapered down to. The doctor I had never pushed for a lower dose or had any kind of idea when people should get off sub. He never brought up gettting off it after a year of seeing him. I got tired of being on sub and decided to taper on my own. I generally don't like being on sub. I'd like to have some to do a proper taper with, but I don't think it's worth the effort to get a doctor and get back on some kind of program.

Holy shit, no way someone should jump from 2mg Suboxone to nothing... what a fucking greedy quack to keep you on it so long and then not even have a plan for jumping off? I'm on a tiny dose of like, literally, maybe .25mg a day that I got from a friend to kind of hold me over until I can get more full-agonists, basically, but I would specifically want heroin... Suboxone really does basically extend your misery rather than just jumping off of a full-agonist at a low dose...

I'm glad you mentioned your experience with Suboxone because I really wanted to get a script but unless you've got a heavy habit and are living a completely harmful life you should just fucking suck it up, because even though it's the most painful way, it's the most beneficial way...

Sorry I'm rambling dude I'm kinda caked.

OT: Still craving heroin OR try IV hydromorphone for the first time, it's driving me mad, it's haunting my dreams... 8(
 
clonazepemmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm (slowly fades and drools on keyboard)
 
Holy shit, no way someone should jump from 2mg Suboxone to nothing... what a fucking greedy quack to keep you on it so long and then not even have a plan for jumping off? I'm on a tiny dose of like, literally, maybe .25mg a day that I got from a friend to kind of hold me over until I can get more full-agonists, basically, but I would specifically want heroin... Suboxone really does basically extend your misery rather than just jumping off of a full-agonist at a low dose...

I'm glad you mentioned your experience with Suboxone because I really wanted to get a script but unless you've got a heavy habit and are living a completely harmful life you should just fucking suck it up, because even though it's the most painful way, it's the most beneficial way...

Sorry I'm rambling dude I'm kinda caked.

OT: Still craving heroin OR try IV hydromorphone for the first time, it's driving me mad, it's haunting my dreams... 8(

I feel I painted a somewhat inaccurate picture. The doctor was a pretty good guy, I just didn't like how he didn't realize the strength of suboxone and how he never had any sort of plan or goal for me getting off sub. He also seemed clueless about the actual tapering with sub and how it would be similar to getting off other opiates/opioids though with a longer WD as I had been taking it daily for over a year.

I like sub as it gives me a bit of time away from full on agonists, so I feel like it gives me a buffer zone away from more active use. I do agree that it can sometimes just prolong any WD suffering, but it's really a matter of how you use it and whether or not you still abuse full on agonists. If it wasn't so much of an effort I'd probably try to get sub prescribed again just so I didn't have to worry about having it, but I don't really need THAT much sub and don't want to be continuing to take it just because I'm getting prescribed or anything.

Honestly when I spent those 2 months tapering from 2mg to nothing at the end of 2007 it was a pretty liberating feeling. The doctor I had probably didn't know anything about the sub WD because I was his first patient to go from being on it for a good period and then getting off of it. I had to figure out how to properly taper and it was awesome to feel myself getting away from opiates. After I got off sub I had some of the best months of my life.

Then I relapsed on dope after being close to 18months away from it and that was the beginning of a slow downward spiral. When I look back on that relapse I can't help but feeling like it was just meant to happen. I was on campus, walking back to my car, and daydreaming about dope when I suddenly hear my name being yelled out. It was Dope Boy! After a minute or two of catching up our conversation switched to the topic of dope and apparently he had a really great dealer who was always around and right in the area. If I had some money I could get bags right then! I did have money! So I did get bags! In a matter of 20minutes it went from casual daydream to sniffing dope all because I happened to be in the right place at the right time.
 
I'm craving heroin :(

Really fucking bad. I'm tearing my hair out. Not in a good place right now. All alone today; my girlfriend went to visit her cousin before I even woke up this afternoon... SHIT, I'm fucked...
 
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