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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

Vent/Rant Thread 1 (POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING)

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^ I'm infering ur in the states, how fucked up, ive seen the same here but the chick didnt have kids in the car but was clearly not able to drive properly.

And yer George always knew how to put it :)
one of my biggest influences in fact.

Now to vent again: FUCK fuckity fuck fuck fuck, i really feel like a drink but i know whats gonna happen if i do.. Stupid fucked up head o'mine grrrr.
 
^ Thats what my psycotherapist told me... just hard to beilve it when it all seems a mess, I'm now looking to get better and study drug and alchohol and psycotherapy. I really dont think i have the apptitude for it, but others are telling me otherwise.

OT: another bunch of dimwits that annnoy me: Proctologists with poor depth perception & dentists with blood in thier hair :/
 
S.M.F.G said:
^ Thats what my psycotherapist told me... just hard to beilve it when it all seems a mess, I'm now looking to get better and study drug and alchohol and psycotherapy. I really dont think i have the apptitude for it, but others are telling me otherwise.

OT: another bunch of dimwits that annnoy me: Proctologists with poor depth perception & dentists with blood in thier hair :/
Click to expand...

maybe, because it actually does seem, i mean IS otherwise!
;-)
wait,,, this was your experience with a proctologist, and a dentist?!?
Zomg dude, Zo - M - G
 
OverDone said:
I'm intolerant towards stupidity and ridiculous over sights.
Stupid, little things drive me fucking nuts! :X
I was told that my outgoing message on my voicemail sounds 'synthesized' and 'robotic'. I can't have that since I have customers calling that number. I have a Nexus S with Sprint service.

I call my voicemail to listen to my outgoing message. There is no option to listen to the current, outgoing message. I can only re-record my outgoing message.

I call Sprint to se what I am overlooking. They say I need to call from another phone to hear what other people hear. Ummmm... what?

I just moved to Colorado and have a Pennsylvania phone number. I don't know anyone well enough to ask if I can use there phone to call MYSELF. If I use a pay phone it will be long distance so, what, around $2 just to listen to a message on my own fucking phone?

Get the fuck out of here Sprint. Fix your shit
Click to expand...
You should switch phone companies ;)
 
Somehow today started on this really strange foot.......
Maybe b/c it is the first day I Woke up alone and have the house to myself in a while- maybe it's b/c I've had nightmares the last 3 night running.....maybe its b/c I'm staying positive and feeling a little guilty over it when I have things I am actually worried over..... I saw a new article about a helicopter down in Afghanistan, and my brother is there and the stupid page wouldn't load to tell me what/who was on the frigging helicopter. I finally got the page to load and saw it was "mostly" NAVY seals- but my heart was about to jump out of my chest when I saw that, knowing my brother is being flown by helicopter and dropped into places at random.......I feel guilty for trying to ignore the thought of him there. Most days I pretend it's not happening to keep sane.
Seeing that stupid article has me worried......I feel for the families who lost people in that crash and I just don't want to ever get that call. I feel selfish for being relieved when I know there are others out there who don't want that call and will now be getting it.....
I have a funeral on Monday for a child and I Feel guilty going but want to support his mother- I am going, but I feel selfish for being sad, like I don't have a right.....
I'm also worried about two other friends who are both going through hard times......
I'm just kind of filled with worry and guilt.
 
hey Ocean,
if i still prayed, i would pray for your brother, but as of now, the best i can do is hope that he stays 100% safe:\
and why do you feel guilty about going to the childs' funeral? was he close to you?
regaurdless, you shouldnt feel selfish for being sad about a death, even if you didnt know the person.
just keep your head up, it'll get better. :D
btw,when ur brother comes home, tell him i said thanks for defending our country:)


on another note:
tomorrow i'll be stopping my Effexor, its only been a week so i dont think i'll have any withdrawal.
the main 2 reasons im stopping is because 1- i really dont think its doing anything, this is the lowest dose prescribeable. 2- now that im back in touch with my bestfriend, we've decided to start experementing with psychedellics n such.

until my depression gets better, im gonna take 5-HTP occassionally and St. Johns Wort on a daily basis probably.
i know i shouldnt quit my antidepresssants but im fuck it, im gonna try cleaning up my diet and being more healthy before i start with the pharms again.
 
Fyasko. i imagine you probably have done so, but just in case, please do read about the interactions St Johns Wort has with different prescription meds...
____________________________________

... ocean, you have every right to feel that way, and some people wont or cant acknowledge or even identify feelings of guilt/empathy - i would assume that those people have a-lot more to feel guilty about.


try and balance the worry and guilt, let them eat each other up into a manageable equality - dont let these feelings do that to you...look at these feelings and emotions, and disassemble them into thoughts. then maybe, after sorting your thoughts gather what is left, and see them as values, as your moral-structure - rambling on further - with this 'structure' understood you then have this to build upon. and i can promise that the morals and values you have inertly, if utilized as building blocks will create an even more solid foundation for yourself.


i really hope that makes sense as written...not easy to say, or do...although with practice and in ones own words, it happens.



<3

NSFW:

heh, or maybe its the catholic in you...
... i was baptized irish catholic myself.
:-\
 
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research assistants creating very, very dangerous problems in a lab where I am the R.S.O. for administrative reasons. I mean my god! This fellow is a P.hd student in physics and he could not (or did not) think of the potential consequences of adding that much reactivity to the system!... Now I get to figure out how to get boric acid solution and cadmium into the experiment room without killing all my leukocytes or at least lowering my sperm count for the next 2 years.... I am fed up with people who don't think before doing something.
 
This has been such a shit week. I can feel myself just totally coming apart and can't do anything about it. I promised myself and my friends back in Chicago that I'd get help for my BPD while at home, but we don't have health insurance anymore, and my mother seems convinced that her sketchily acquired Lexapro script is gonna be my cure-all. I can't sleep, and I've been forcing myself to go to work because I'm fucked if I don't, but I really, really don't think I can handle going to that place in the morning. I don't want to talk to anyone, but I also can't stand being alone to drown in my own fucking head. This summer needs to end immediately, or it's gonna end up taking me with it.
 
I'm so dissilusioned with the world atm i just wanna crawl into a hole, but why the fuck should i? my mood is rapidly going downhill an im feelin hell angry. not much of a vent but its off my chest now il go fuckoff and do some other shit which will more than likley annoy me in some way:X
 
i really would like, and do need to eat more then once this week with out it making a return, same goes for my pills...!
fuck

oh yeah hah!

i had mentioned by bloodpressure @ 160/91 then it was 148/88, last check i was 60/48. my doctor see this, but...more pills, thats all i need.!

my bad

=D
 
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Jebus man, I hope that the whitecoats can figure out what's up soon; doesn't sound like a fun time. Not that it will help much, but I'll be hoping for the best for you.

-------

Fuck the FDA/USP. Ferreal. I understand that they both do very important work, but there is virtually no recourse when someone wants to challenge them, short of suing. Their 'guidance' is absolute law, their test methods are the only ones that will be accepted, and if you don't like it, well then: you can just forget about selling your productin the USA, and by extension much of the western world.

Without going into specifics, at work we're developing a product for medical use, and laready have FDA approval. A few months ago we've had a new requirement slapped on us (and only us, not for any of our competitors) with respect to our lot release testing. In short, we need to send samples from every lot we produce to undergo a biological test that is extremely touchy in the best of conditions, and in our case virtually invalid. Our material interferes with the test in nearly every possible way, to the point where the results are basically random, non-repeatable and vary within the same lot of material BY UP TO THREE FUCKING ORDERS OF MAGNITUDE. That's like saying that two widgets, produced from the same materials, using the same methods, and everything else being equal, somehow vary in a parameter by a factor of a thousand or more.

I'm already pushing up against confidentiality, so I'll cut it there. The crux of all this is that everything points to the test being bunk, but the contract lab performing the testing refuses to even consider the possibility that the test is not valid for us. In their mind, there is something in our process that varies on a second-to-second basis that would cause this thousand-fold increase in the test response. Which is utter malarkey. Our options at this point are: try to shoehorn the test to make it look like it is valid, which will likely take a few months and tens of thousands of dollars, or try to convince the FDA that the test is not valid for us, which will take a few weeks to submit our argument, but may come back with us being told that the test is valid and our product is not. Meaning: recall.

But that's what you get when bureaucrats are in charge. They aren't ever wrong, and are completely unwilling to listen to people who understand the technical side of the situation in question, because it may mean that they'll have to admit that one test does not work for every possible situation.

Graar!
 
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