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Various downers - Experienced - benzo medley

narutokun

narutokun

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 21, 2007
Messages
1,612
Wow. The only time I had this kind of amnesia was when I had little benzo tolerance and took 4mg of flunitrazepam oraly. Yesterday night I thought I wouldn't be able to go to sleep (had 100mg mph and 30mg midazolam iv) a while before. So i took downers and other stuff i had available here: oraly 3x 2mg estazolam, 250mg gaba. then i decided to shoot 60mg midazolam to knock me out. so i prepped the shot and went to the bathroom to take a shower, i took the shower and shot what was able to fit on a 10ml syringe (not the whole 60mg). i felt the urge to do that even when i was aware that my parents were home. after i shot the midazolam i can't remember much of what happened, i went back to my room and filled a 3ml rig with the rest of the midazolam i had prepared then i took 10mg zolpidem, 7,5mg zopiclone and 10mg of baclofen i don't remember having shot the 3ml of midazolam or if i did it safly or not, don't remember what i did to the needles and stuff, that really bothers me ugh. all i remember are unconnected events like fragments. i was so fucked up that i went to have dinner (not very good idea) with the torniquette hanging around my neck (i still don't know why i did that i thought i had hidden it) under my shirt and my parents asked me wtf i was doing (i'm used to being high around my parents without being visualy fucked, i mean without my parents being able to spot that i'm high) then my mom asked me to show her my upper arms and spotted the injection marks i remember they going on about that i shouldn't inject myself and that i was killing myself and they thought whenever i'm home alone that i keep injecting (which i do) and that they wanted me to tell them where i store my drug paraphernalia and shit; i couldn't give less of a fuck to what they were saying and had a great dinner. when i get very high on downerz i have the stupid uncontrolable feeling of having more of whatever i have around so i went outside smoked a kretek and now my datura tree is flowering so i went downstairs and literaly ate 2 flowers (tasted bitter ew); before i passed out on my bed i remember i took lots of pills i'm still not very sure what but from what i checked today when i woke up i ate more 3 baclofen pills, 500mg gaba (2 pills), 4 x 2mg alprazolam and like 3x 30mg codeine-only pills. i slept very well for over 14 hours which was great lol but at the same time my parents found out that i abuse drugs and what they consider me to be an "addict".
i dunno why i posted this i just noticed it's quite long sorry lol i don't really have anyone irl to talk to dunno if it's cause of my antisocial behavior or it's just everyone that pretends not being a drug user pfft
(i also posted this on my journal) ;)
 
PLEASE stop abusing yourself!!

Shooting pills will only lead you to two places:
- Being Dead.
- Being in so much untreatable pain that you wish you were dead.

If you have so much tolerance to benzos that you can take them up and down like that, YOU ARE AN ADDICT.

PLEASE stop abusing yourself like that.
 
Thanks for sharing. Unfortunately it does seem that your parents are right. You should really, really stop injecting yourself, and work towards reducing the role that drugs play in your life. It seems obvious that your use of drugs is to replace something else in your life. In any case, you at least need to get your addiction down to a level in which you're not putting yourself into these kinds of situations.

Hell, man, I'm a drug addict myself, as are many here who are being honest with themselves. So please don't take this advice as something to roll your eyes at from a straight-edge who doesn't understand. Please understand that what I say to you is a very serious thing. Benzo dependence is messy and dangerous, and so is IVing.
 
Listen to xorkoth, I myself struggl with Opiate Addiction, and I must say, if you are not ready to quit then please learn how to manage your addiction, or you will eventually cause lots of heartache to you and your family
 
thanks everyone for reading it already means a lot to me since i can't talk to anyone irl about this stuff and yeah it maybe to replace something else in my life something that i cant have that i cant do and also to take away the pain from other things... i'm 16 now how much longer will i live if i inject pills like once a day? (that sounds stupid, sorry) Jamshyd what do you mean that it can lead to untreatable pain, what kind of pain is that from vein damage, lung damage? i didn't quite get it.. isn't the way everyone talks about injecting pills dangers a little exagerated? it's not like i can get this stuff on vials with ready injectable solution
i got some self control.. or at least i like to think so, like i said that only happens when i'm already high then i don't have any control (obviously) :p
 
If you keep injecting pills "once a day", you might die any day now if a particle gets into your heart or brain and you get an embolism. If you don't get particulate matter into your heart, you will die painfully in less than a couple of years because of both vein and lung damage.

No, people do no exaggerate injecting pills. There is simply no way to safely filter pills - there will always be stuff in the solution that you will not be able to see with your naked eye.

At the very least, PLEASE get yourself some micron filters.

The drugs you are injecting work well if you take them orally or snort them. You abolutely have no excuse injecting them daily!! I mean I'd understand if it was a drug that wouldn't work orally or snorted, but these ones do, and injecting them doesn't give much more advantage over oral/snorted, and makes them last shorter!
 
I feel really sorry for your parents. Imagine what theyre feeling, their kid is killing himself slowly and they have to watch it.

Settle down man, its not good or normal what your doing.
 
Listen to Jamshyd... if you are unwilling to stop IVing, then please do not IV pills. They're filled with fillers and binders (and sometimes waxes, even worse)and it's not possible to get all of that out of there with any items you might be able to get. Unfortunately, people tend to underemphasize the dangers of injecting pills. :(

Anyway, seriously, thanks for sharing, and don't think we're getting down on you. We're just offering our opinions and advice. :)
 
thx everyone it means a lot. my parents won't leave the stupid house now cuz they think that whenever they leave i'll starting shootin up so it's been hard for me to do it as much as i want to. i have no idea where to get micron filters here where i live it's a shame really so i mostly double filter through cotton i might be able to get pure powders so hopefuly i won't be injecting pills anymore (at least not benzos) but still whenever i look at those pills i just feel like it's a waste eating them
 
Damn dude, your only sixteen years old and abusing all those medications..
I actually got sad after reading your storie, you cant be prescribed all those Bensodiazepines right?
I can totally relate to what your parents are going trough right now, have you considered seeking some outside help?
Dont know where you live and what help there is to get for you but there IS some great help to get.

I have many years behind me of drug and alcohol addiction, - bensos, heroin and so on.
Getting f*cked up on bensos can be really dangerous, i guess we all have woken up more than one time with all bensos eaten.. :|

Well, atleast you inject one benso that actually IS watersoluable - Midazolam.
Ofcourse you wont get rid of all the fillers.
 
Kosloff said:
Damn dude, your only sixteen years old and abusing all those medications..
I actually got sad after reading your storie, you cant be prescribed all those Bensodiazepines right?
I can totally relate to what your parents are going trough right now, have you considered seeking some outside help?
Dont know where you live and what help there is to get for you but there IS some great help to get.

I have many years behind me of drug and alcohol addiction, - bensos, heroin and so on.
Getting f*cked up on bensos can be really dangerous, i guess we all have woken up more than one time with all bensos eaten.. :|

Well, atleast you inject one benso that actually IS watersoluable - Midazolam.
Ofcourse you wont get rid of all the fillers.
Click to expand...

<3 oh hey thx for reading i thought that my post was dead lol i totaly liked the fact to know that i'm not the only one that woke up with all their benzos eaten, i mean i never really heard ppl saying that
btw i'm going through w/d right now and after this happened my parents took all of my money and drugs away if you wanna read my other post the link is:
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/showthread.php?p=5333445#post5333445
 
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