Useless psychotherapy

[Survival0200]

Hi!

I've been in psychotherapy for three years now. Lately I've noticed, that I haven't really gained anything with this therapy. I admit that it's nice to talk to someone about your past and daily life, but I haven't really gotten anything concrete, that I could present as a result of the therapy. Sometimes it's really awkward when I don't really have any subjects I'd like to talk or work with my therapists. I don't like making drawings or lists about my issues, because I feel like it's useless to write anything down - what could he do to my problems? It doesn't help making maps or diagraphs - it's just annoying. For me it's okay if we just talk, but I'm just updating my situation (what have I done in the past week, what my thoughts have been and so on). I haven't really gotten any "keys" to my problems. I still have anxiety and issues with paranoid thinking and over-thinking. I'm just sticking with the therapy, because my primary care doctor appreciates me being in psychotherapy, and I'm just basically being on the therapy to give a positive impression - that I give a picture of a good patient. I'm just wishing that the useless psychotherapy would end soon, and I wouldn't have to bother going there once a week for one hour. I know everybody who needs psychotherapy are not getting it due to lack of resources and money, but I don't really feel like needing this kind of "treatment" - it's useless for me... I'd just rather eat my pills - at least they help symptoms in a real way by affecting my brain chemistry - what the psychotherapy doesn't do.

I just wanted to tell my story and my experience on psychotherapy. All comments and experiences on psychotherapy are welcome - I'd like to hear your view on psychotherapy.

P.S. Am I doing something wrong or is my attitude wrong with the therapy - what do you think? Am I too lazy to work my issues with the therapist, or am I just the kind of person, that really doesn't benefit from this kind of treatment?

 

[charcoal]

I spent 10 years in psychotherapy, and two of those years were doubled up with an addiction therapist as well.

I got nothing from it. No ah ha moment, no comfort, nothing. I had great therapists, the therapy was free, so I just plugged on. Nothing.

Works fantastically for some people but not me. Conversations with my psychiatrist though are far more enlightening, as well as a psych nurse in hospital last year. Both are men. My therapists were women. I'm also female. Maybe there's something significant there for me.

 

[Bojangles69]

I'm actually getting into doing therapy myself and will admit thats absolutely true for a lot of people. Tons of people do not have an "aha" moment in therapy and thats almost not even what its for. So many people just get up and go to therapy like you said because they can "plug in" and they don't actually have any specific issues in their life they want to work on so nothing really gets accomplished.

I will tell you what psychotherapy IS good for though cause I did it for 6 years on my own.
Its good for people that have an overwhelming conviction to want to better their lives even when they're not in therapy. My shrink always use to tell me that those types of personalities are the onces that usually "excel" at therapy. When their therapist gives them ideas they just don't say "oh thats a good idea" they take that idea and implement it into their life proactively. So many people just go to therapy for the perspective and become lazy. The reason for this is not always just the persons personality but that so many therapists do not set restrictions in therapy.

One of the most useful restrictions, and let me tell you I've been to A LOT of great shrinks, but not one of them ever set restrictions - is the 6 month restriction of therapy. Or you can obviously do a year too but 6 months I was told is generally the best. You tell your patient therapy will END at that point. If you do not do this niether the patient or therapist will ever become strategic in the therapeutic approach. And this is precisely why so many people leave therapy unhappy. You can not just go with an unlimited length of time this never works in therapy. And if you are in therapy now and your therapist has not set time restrictions chances are you are wasting a lot of time. Its as simple as that.

The other real issue is the nature of the therapy too. Psychotherapy is naturally random even when time restrictions are set it can go on in a pretty random way. Behavoiral therapy is naturally selective and organized. Involves a lot more paper generally and way more behavoiral therapists use notes than psychotherapists. It really helps move things along towards a specific goal.
I went to psychotherapy and had some of the most intellectual conversations of my life in there. But in terms of fixing my life it only slightly helped me cope with life better. Then I was in a psychward for 2 weeks at another point in my life and saw a behavoiral therapist. In those 2 weeks I shit you not I accomplished more good for my life than the 6 years w/out time restrictions in psychtherapy. Thats because of the reasons I mentioned above. And these are some things to look out for in the future when you are in psychotherapy, time limits absolutely need to be set or nothing will ever be accomplished.

 

[Dave]

Which treatments were being used, OP? Different things work for different people. For example: I didn't respond much to psychoanalysis, but responded like a hot damn to EMDR and CBT.

If you've been at the same thing for that long, working at it sincerely, with no good results, then a change may be in order. I'd personally recommend still seeing a psychologist, but maybe have them take a different tack, or try a new one who specializes in a different technique(s).

 

[Survival0200]

^I think it's something called cognitive psychotherapy.

 

[Dave]

Not cognitive behavioural therapy? That's the CBT that I mentioned. It takes boatloads of work to make it work, as it's more of a method to reprogram your thought patterns.

My point remains though: if you've been focusing on a single therapeutic style for that long with minimal results, then a change is probably in order.

 

[blakmike]

This is disheartening. I tried to destroy my body and mind with MDPV this summer. Ive attended therapy with a cognitivebehaivoral therapist 3 times these past weeks. He seems like a good guy and agree with/respect his opinions. I feel good for taking this step and need the human contact and forming complete sentences with my mouth. I'mma try an NA meeting today...

 

[Dave]

Keep it it blakmike-- everyone responds differently to different therapies. Especially for something like CBT, three sessions is nowhere near enough time to make a call on whether or not it has been working. As I've mentioned before, CBT takes work. Lots of it. For the therapist, sure, but especially for the patient. It's basically teaching yourself new mental habits, which requires levels of persistence and consistency that are seen in few other human activities. But the payoff is the ability to regain (or in the case of many, just gain) control over our mental and emotional state, and being able to better roll with the punches that life throws at us.

 

[xxsicknessxx]

I say be thank full you got therapy for free. Some people do need it. Sure maybe its not helping but sometimes you don't know until you don't have it. Maybe if you stopped going you would notice it was helping. Know what I mean? Just keep going it doesn't cost ya anything maybe someday you will look back and see it did more then you thought. I used think talking about my problems was pointless but now I see that when I had someone to talk to it helped a lot. I don't now.

 

[Legerity]

Yeah if you're not noticing any benefit after three years it seems like it may be worthwhile to try something else. Therapy isn't inherently beneficial it really depends on both the therapist, the approach, and your own attitude. If you want to be a good patient then do whatever it is that is most helpful for yourself; you don't owe it to any doctor to do what you think they want you to.

 

[shezinphx]

Have tried switching therapists? I agree with everyone else here. If it's not working then make a change. Your therapist should also have some sort of plan for you with goals and what goals need to be met to one day be able to end therapy. Unfortunately, most of these businesses are for profit and some lose sight of what it's meant to be for. Even some non-profit organizations keep clients beyond their need to meet their financial needs. Time is valuable so it would definitely be in your best interest to explore what options you have and what resources are available to you. You need something that works for you. Not your therapist.