Had work a lil there...then 2 hour lunch break cause we are slow.
Anyway, he was smart and we had a lot in common but not so much that we couldn't learn from each other. There isn't anything we can't talk about.
With Sean, I couldn't remember, other than our first date when I was drunk and he just listened neither of us could remember a time where we just sat and talked all night.
Things with Tony are interesting for some reason we both feel like we have been together for months and act like it. I feel bad because it seems like I replaced Sean with Tony, instead of staying the night at Sean's I stay with Tony. Although I have to bring my own pillow since he has 2 furbabies that shed like crazy and I'm allergic. But I guess I had been falling away from Sean cause well, I was easy, he thought I would never leave. He told me so afterwards. He started to treat me badly and even when he was ok, he was ok.... Tony, I know its new, just seems so different.
Now I mentioned we get stoned, well we have a lot as of late just because, well I can. Sean was always so judgemental about things. Tony accepts me as I am. So I did some drugs, big deal. Not so wild about meth, but I wouldn't have to hide it from him. He doesn't hassle me about my glasses the way Sean always did, that I should wear my contacts. Or my make-up...he says he doesn't like a lot and he can't deside on a little or none lol. I know its new but we are both rather smitten with each other. That is the word we have chosen.
I've been having interesting experiences. I've been watching movies with Tony, stoned. Something I never did before, and I said "Its like my brain is relubricated and running sideways." I just suddenly saw everything in it so differently although I had seen it many times before.
Then the other day, ok back up. I'm lil so Tony as dropped adorable and cute cause I hate it, and has taken up the "pet name" of calling me a pixie. So I decided, ok yeah I just cut my hair and its a fun concept and I like him saying that (although he is on the short side, he says that I'm one of the few women that makes him feel tall. He seems amazed often at how little I am... at 22 lol ) so I decided instead of being a vampire as usual this halloween I'd be a pixie. So I looked it up...its origin is CORNISH! My family on my mom's side came from Cornwall, England. When I was younger and asked why I looked so "dark" (eyes hair, all that) my mother said it was the cornish in me. Strange huh?
So I have started on my costume already. I was inspired to be creative and that night I was filled with a very Piscan like sense of creativeity and mysticism that I haven't felt in a LONG time.
Not to mention, he is working on the house he lives at and we often will sit and talk decorating. His roomate that lives upstairs (and her illegal immigrant bf who Tony can't even speak to because he doesn't know spanish, he does like ordinary for sure...and I think he has a huge heart. But its a lil strange, now and then I bug him about it...
) doesn't really do any decorating or anythign downstairs, so Tony and I talk about it.
His living is this really sweet mix of antique and industrial. It's truely an amazing concept. But the walls are bare. He does have some blueprints of nuclear bombs we used to put up and a old old interesting movie poster... but he has commissioned me to do a art project for another.
He wanted to see my take on him. The things he enjoys and how I see him. So I've been working on that and I hope to be able to maybe share it with you all.
The photos will be black and white to try to add and keep the antique look...I mean he has a antique typewriter on his coffee tabe which is a old balck trunk, part of a wonderfully colored blue motorcyle on metal shelving with his books, and a old wooden radio in the corner...its so hard to explain it really but it works! ANY....
we think putting the pictures up on a old worn cork board would be a interesting way to display them, but wear would you find one....
The large flea market they have around here a couple times a year. (I had told Sean about it and he said no way.) You can find all kinds of strange and wonderful things there so we are planning to go in October. Good maybe I won't get heat stroke.
Hmm Tony is different in a lot of ways, only 3 years older but more together. BUT still young at heart. Sean hates bars, Tony doesn't mind hitting one with me. Sean doesn't like his parents that much...Tony sees them often lately, party out there and all, but my parents were like his second parents and holds them in high esteem. Sean hasn't met any of my friends and would say things like he doesn't like my family and he doesn't even want to meet my friends. Tony on the other hand, already knows some of my friends and like I said is rather accepting naturally and likes them, has no issues.
Right now, we see each other daily since he is so close, just across town, that isn't far compared to Sean. I still haven't mentioned to my family that Sean and I are done and that I"m seeing Tony, I mean he was the older kid next door and I'm not sure how they are going to feel about it. Although it really does seem like he would treat me right, and if he didn't there would be hell to pay I'm sure. But then agai I thought Sean would be a certain way and he changed, now he is committed to becoming that old person I fell for but it might all be too little, too late.
Of course being on my meds and off meth helps, pver a month off... I can see serious addiction there, but now and then I'm not totally turned off by the drug. Tony said he had run into it now and then, someone told him it was coke and then laughed when he learned it wasn't, dirty trick to play if you ask me. But really neither of us do anything but smoke pot together at night at the moment. My pain pills will be around here soon, but we have talked and he doesn't seem like he would be too bothered, as long as I maintained it....and well, I go half the month or more sober anyway because I run out. Lol
Right now I feel happy, and alive. Its sad Sean feels the way he does but thats just the way it went...
Life is never simple, perhaps life is nothing more than a series of random events and we make the choices that make those events not random and contain some meaning...
Anyway, he was smart and we had a lot in common but not so much that we couldn't learn from each other. There isn't anything we can't talk about.
With Sean, I couldn't remember, other than our first date when I was drunk and he just listened neither of us could remember a time where we just sat and talked all night.
Things with Tony are interesting for some reason we both feel like we have been together for months and act like it. I feel bad because it seems like I replaced Sean with Tony, instead of staying the night at Sean's I stay with Tony. Although I have to bring my own pillow since he has 2 furbabies that shed like crazy and I'm allergic. But I guess I had been falling away from Sean cause well, I was easy, he thought I would never leave. He told me so afterwards. He started to treat me badly and even when he was ok, he was ok.... Tony, I know its new, just seems so different.
Now I mentioned we get stoned, well we have a lot as of late just because, well I can. Sean was always so judgemental about things. Tony accepts me as I am. So I did some drugs, big deal. Not so wild about meth, but I wouldn't have to hide it from him. He doesn't hassle me about my glasses the way Sean always did, that I should wear my contacts. Or my make-up...he says he doesn't like a lot and he can't deside on a little or none lol. I know its new but we are both rather smitten with each other. That is the word we have chosen.
I've been having interesting experiences. I've been watching movies with Tony, stoned. Something I never did before, and I said "Its like my brain is relubricated and running sideways." I just suddenly saw everything in it so differently although I had seen it many times before.
Then the other day, ok back up. I'm lil so Tony as dropped adorable and cute cause I hate it, and has taken up the "pet name" of calling me a pixie. So I decided, ok yeah I just cut my hair and its a fun concept and I like him saying that (although he is on the short side, he says that I'm one of the few women that makes him feel tall. He seems amazed often at how little I am... at 22 lol ) so I decided instead of being a vampire as usual this halloween I'd be a pixie. So I looked it up...its origin is CORNISH! My family on my mom's side came from Cornwall, England. When I was younger and asked why I looked so "dark" (eyes hair, all that) my mother said it was the cornish in me. Strange huh?
So I have started on my costume already. I was inspired to be creative and that night I was filled with a very Piscan like sense of creativeity and mysticism that I haven't felt in a LONG time.
Not to mention, he is working on the house he lives at and we often will sit and talk decorating. His roomate that lives upstairs (and her illegal immigrant bf who Tony can't even speak to because he doesn't know spanish, he does like ordinary for sure...and I think he has a huge heart. But its a lil strange, now and then I bug him about it...
) doesn't really do any decorating or anythign downstairs, so Tony and I talk about it.His living is this really sweet mix of antique and industrial. It's truely an amazing concept. But the walls are bare. He does have some blueprints of nuclear bombs we used to put up and a old old interesting movie poster... but he has commissioned me to do a art project for another.
He wanted to see my take on him. The things he enjoys and how I see him. So I've been working on that and I hope to be able to maybe share it with you all.
The photos will be black and white to try to add and keep the antique look...I mean he has a antique typewriter on his coffee tabe which is a old balck trunk, part of a wonderfully colored blue motorcyle on metal shelving with his books, and a old wooden radio in the corner...its so hard to explain it really but it works! ANY....
we think putting the pictures up on a old worn cork board would be a interesting way to display them, but wear would you find one....
The large flea market they have around here a couple times a year. (I had told Sean about it and he said no way.) You can find all kinds of strange and wonderful things there so we are planning to go in October. Good maybe I won't get heat stroke.
Hmm Tony is different in a lot of ways, only 3 years older but more together. BUT still young at heart. Sean hates bars, Tony doesn't mind hitting one with me. Sean doesn't like his parents that much...Tony sees them often lately, party out there and all, but my parents were like his second parents and holds them in high esteem. Sean hasn't met any of my friends and would say things like he doesn't like my family and he doesn't even want to meet my friends. Tony on the other hand, already knows some of my friends and like I said is rather accepting naturally and likes them, has no issues.
Right now, we see each other daily since he is so close, just across town, that isn't far compared to Sean. I still haven't mentioned to my family that Sean and I are done and that I"m seeing Tony, I mean he was the older kid next door and I'm not sure how they are going to feel about it. Although it really does seem like he would treat me right, and if he didn't there would be hell to pay I'm sure. But then agai I thought Sean would be a certain way and he changed, now he is committed to becoming that old person I fell for but it might all be too little, too late.
Of course being on my meds and off meth helps, pver a month off... I can see serious addiction there, but now and then I'm not totally turned off by the drug. Tony said he had run into it now and then, someone told him it was coke and then laughed when he learned it wasn't, dirty trick to play if you ask me. But really neither of us do anything but smoke pot together at night at the moment. My pain pills will be around here soon, but we have talked and he doesn't seem like he would be too bothered, as long as I maintained it....and well, I go half the month or more sober anyway because I run out. Lol
Right now I feel happy, and alive. Its sad Sean feels the way he does but thats just the way it went...
Life is never simple, perhaps life is nothing more than a series of random events and we make the choices that make those events not random and contain some meaning...