If you're truly scared you'll hurt yourself, please tell someone that will be able to stay with you and make sure you do not hurt yourself. If there is no one you trust that you can tell, go to the ER. Just don't sit there alone, being depressed and seriously contemplating suicide. It's not worth it. Also, the drugs aren't helping. If you can stop using, definitely do that. Also, try going to sleep. My insomnia gets really bad sometimes(like now that it's 6am and I've been positing on here all night, lol) and if I don't sleep for a few days in a row, I become really moody and irritable. You'll feel a lot better after a good night's sleep. Since you've been doing meth and coke, that might be difficult. If you have access to any benzos, they would help greatly. If not, try taking a few benedryl/unisom/wtv OTC diphenhydramine pills you can find, they would also help you get to sleep.