Hopeless Unsure what to do

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Okay, I don't know if this is the right place to put this post, if it is wrong could mods please move. it Thank you.

I dunno what to do anymore. First off I lost about four thousand through polipay. Second off I lost $461.50 on Ebay.
I'm shattered because I had lots and lots and lots of money, now I have nothing. I wants it back. I just feel so, so, Ugh.
I'm a methamphetamine addict. I like to call it methamphetamine because meth just seems dirty, and it's not. It's not as bad as those meth montana project ads, they are an absolute joke.

Everyone thinks i'm schizophrenic and i'm not, i'm also shattered about this. I made a thread about this in the lounge (I know its a joke forum but I didn't know where it to put it, much like this post, I should have asked the mods if it was allowed)
Maybe I am schizophrenic because I tripped over and almost fell to the ground on the train the other train, and some Lady said "spastic" I'm pretty sure she was talking about me because when I turned around she was looking at me with a grin on her face.
I was very upset about this.

There was only about four people on the train because of the Conara virus so i'm happy the train wasn't full or the whole train would have laughed at me.
I don't have a car so I have to catch the train or walk everywhere. Ugh
I hate my psychiatrist his a fuckhead he pulls the strings, he's in charge. I would love to do something like torture him and his family.


My neighbours watch me on the cellphone and don't know what to do about it.
I left a not written on a piece of paper saying "Liars" and sticky taped on there driveway. They knew it was me because I confronted them the day before. So hello just say neighhhh bours. I know you're watching me.
They watch me go to the bathroom and I can't do anything about it. They USED to watch me masturbate, I say USED to because I have no Libido anymore, oh no I just remembered they watched me at a hotel I stayed at. (I have Libido when I take Methamphetamine) They watched me masturbate on the floor (I should have said "jerkin' off on the sheets, when I stay at Hotels) like the lyrical mastermind Immortal Technique says on the track Obnoxious. It's an Invasion of privacy. It has to stop. I don't know what to do to them.

Well I don't know where I'm headed with this my neighbours are my main concern.
What should I do?
 
I would like to tell you that I am very sorry your post was moved to the lounge and you were attacked during a dark time in your life.

What makes you think that people are watching you darling?

Have you told your doctor these things about people watching you?
 
Just for reference (and not to demean you or imply you're mentally ill), if you are concerned about people spying on you all the time, or effecting you somehow with malicious thinking, and especially if you act threateningly towards people (even just by leaving notes), you are definitely checking many of the boxes for a schizophrenia diagnosis.

Did you know methamphetamine use can make thoughts and feelings of this sort more frequent? Part of its stimulant activity (and its side effects) comes from its ability to activate the fight-or-flight response that adrenaline provides. With continuous use, your mind is kept on high alert for unhealthy amounts of time, and can start making up threats where none exist.

I'm sure you've heard stories of methamphetamine users who have to contend with "shadow people" who they can sense but never see, or police agents they know must be weatching them, or even people who disassemble and destroy their living quarters and anything larger than a pack of cards that was inside it in a search for recording devices they fear have been watching them. In many cases there is no actual threat, and such thinking goes away with reduction in dose.

If you do want to act on this thought process, I urge you to do so in as calm and rational a method as possible. It would be best to have someone you trust come and help you compose a letter or something, and structure your thoughts coherently. You have nothing to gain by using threats of any sort, or acts that could be construed as violent or damaging to property. Rather than direct accusations, open-ended questions are better. Overconfidence will not help either.

Compare these two statements:

"Hello Bill. I don't want to alarm you, but I've been concerned reecently that someone's been watching me. It could be my imagination, but I'm curious, have you seen or heard anything? I just want everyone to stay safe"

"I know you've been watching me you fucking pervert. I'm going to come crack you over the head with a nine iron. I bet you want to sabotage my life, well, I won't let you"

Which do you think will be most effective? Which one sounds more rational and friendly? Which would be more embarassing if you said it to someone who turned out to be totally uninvolved?

Just a thought.
 
People can hear to a neighboring apartment and even see what's happening on their computer screens with quite low-cost equipment, but thinking they can see you in full color without having an actual camera lens installed somewhere is quite delusional. The problem is that people with a known mental disorder get easily bullied by neigbors or co-workers who want to get rid of them, and it's almost impossible for others to tell which part of it is actually happening and what is delusional thinking.
 
Its never to late to turn around your life even once hitting rock bottom. Addiction is a powerful thing to battle but i believe you need love and support which sadly doesn't seem to the way of the world due to the war on drugs. Your best bet would be taking the first step to maybe enlisting in a rehab to help you. Meth really does you send crazy as do all stimulant abuse you can recover from stimulant psychosis after abstaining and returning back to average day life maybe need some anti psychotics to stabilize you first. I been there on stimulants believing the CIA and the illumanti had wire tapped my entire house and seeing shadow people ghosts and demons and almost felt possessed at one point but once i cut out stimulants all the crazy thoughts and delusions went away.

Going for long walks out in nature can help ground you just walk for hours on ends.

Breaking your addiction and finding a support group for rehab to bring your life into stability then working and slowly putting your money back together you will 100% need some external help and i believe their should be some groups out there to support meth addicts i seen it destroy australia and NZ but i also seen amazing recoveries of people take place once they were able to find the help they needed and the support to get back on track to a worthwhile life.
 
I'll get back to this thread. I just feel alone, sad, don't have a girlfriend. I promise I will get back to this thread to reply to you're kind words <3 <3<3<3<3
 
Its never to late to turn around your life even once hitting rock bottom. Addiction is a powerful thing to battle but i believe you need love and support which sadly doesn't seem to the way of the world due to the war on drugs. Your best bet would be taking the first step to maybe enlisting in a rehab to help you. Meth really does you send crazy as do all stimulant abuse you can recover from stimulant psychosis after abstaining and returning back to average day life maybe need some anti psychotics to stabilize you first. I been there on stimulants believing the CIA and the illumanti had wire tapped my entire house and seeing shadow people ghosts and demons and almost felt possessed at one point but once i cut out stimulants all the crazy thoughts and delusions went away.

Going for long walks out in nature can help ground you just walk for hours on ends.

Breaking your addiction and finding a support group for rehab to bring your life into stability then working and slowly putting your money back together you will 100% need some external help and i believe their should be some groups out there to support meth addicts i seen it destroy australia and NZ but i also seen amazing recoveries of people take place once they were able to find the help they needed and the support to get back on track to a worthwhile life.
Going for long walks out in nature can help ground you just walk for hours on ends. What da fuck you sayin' I'm some damn nerd going for walks out in nature? Fuck outta here
 
Its never to late to turn around your life even once hitting rock bottom. Addiction is a powerful thing to battle but i believe you need love and support which sadly doesn't seem to the way of the world due to the war on drugs. Your best bet would be taking the first step to maybe enlisting in a rehab to help you. Meth really does you send crazy as do all stimulant abuse you can recover from stimulant psychosis after abstaining and returning back to average day life maybe need some anti psychotics to stabilize you first. I been there on stimulants believing the CIA and the illumanti had wire tapped my entire house and seeing shadow people ghosts and demons and almost felt possessed at one point but once i cut out stimulants all the crazy thoughts and delusions went away.

Going for long walks out in nature can help ground you just walk for hours on ends.

Breaking your addiction and finding a support group for rehab to bring your life into stability then working and slowly putting your money back together you will 100% need some external help and i believe their should be some groups out there to support meth addicts i seen it destroy australia and NZ but i also seen amazing recoveries of people take place once they were able to find the help they needed and the support to get back on track to a worthwhile life.
I'm sorry I apologize I suffer from bipolar disord0e0r
 
People can hear to a neighboring apartment and even see what's happening on their computer screens with quite low-cost equipment, but thinking they can see you in full color without having an actual camera lens installed somewhere is quite delusional. The problem is that people with a known mental disorder get easily bullied by neigbors or co-workers who want to get rid of them, and it's almost impossible for others to tell which part of it is actually happening and what is delusional thinking.
What you mean people cant ser what's on your comp screen...I know people saw me fap for hours to chaturbate. And I came alllllllll over the floor..That chaturbate thing is the shit! It's free and other people tip to reach the goal whether it be spit on there tits which is my absolute favorite I fap faster and faster when they do that
 
How are they watching you, peeking through the widows, hidden cameras, etc...? I'm not mocking the situation, I'm just trying to help you see reality for what it is. The events you've described, along with your drug use and mental health, are almost certainly delusions.
 
Tv
How are they watching you, peeking through the widows, hidden cameras, etc...? I'm not mocking the situation, I'm just trying to help you see reality for what it is. The events you've described, along with your drug use and mental health, are almost certainly delusions.
I'm really tired atm but thanks for the reply...I'll reply you soon as I can
 
Quo
I would like to tell you that I am very sorry your post was moved to the lounge and you were attacked during a dark time in your life.

What makes you think that people are watching you darling?

Have you told your doctor these things about people watching you?
Lol PLEASE DON'T CALL ME DARLING LOL
 
I'm sorry I apologize I suffer from bipolar disord0e0r
You can live the life or the diagnosis it’s your choice. I don’t know you, I don’t have any place to speak about this and really no one else does. We can base this off psychiatry, but mental health treatment has done nothing for me. A bunch of pills, a practice that has no scientific basis nor can really ever be proven short of “you have these symptoms so most likely this is what you are”. It sounds to me that if your really concerned with your health you’ll get off the meth stop worry about money that you can’t take with you when you go. And find something in your life that makes you happy no matter what anyone else says or does. I also have “bipolar” my dad committed suicide because of “bipolar” I’ve tried. You know what we both had in common? Drug usage. Especially the love of stims like cocaine and in his case crack. I also use to think everyone’s out to get me I got tired of living in fear. Give your mind more credit. It’s a lot stronger then what you’ve been told by doctors trying to push a list of substances. I have a bug in my ass towards doctors so even though I say things your path may not be mine. But your a person specified. You deserve to find happiness.
 
People are way to self involved, none is watching you! What makes you so special that people need to watch you? Trust me it's all in your head, I say again put the fucking pipe down and get some sleep ffs! You need to settle down and get a hobby or something, it seems like you must be watching them, to know they are watching you. So stop watching them!
 
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